Lockdown Toy Boy

I was expecting some kind of witty response, but her reaction surprised and delighted me. "Matthew, you cannot begin to know how that makes me feel. To think that something I did back then - in what sometimes seems like another world - still resonates; still has life and meaning. The thought that a young man so far removed from the age in which I worked finds it erotic fills me with pride and joy."

Her whole body shook. "Ooh I've gone a little shivery! So come on then, don't keep me in suspense. Tell me what you found!"

"I found a lot, and it was all gold-dust. How do you keep it a secret?"

She shrugged. "I don't - simple as. I don't broadcast it if that's what you mean. It's all out there in the public domain after all - can't take it back and redact it, can I? Not that I'd want to of course - I'm as proud of it now as I was back then. Maybe more so given that it's still turning people on. Some folk that know about it accept it. A few bigots hate me for it and some folk are confused. Hey, that's life, huh? So, come on, spill the beans to a dirty old lady. What utter depraved filth did you see her getting up to?"

I gave her a brief synopsis of what I had read and seen and she kept smiling and nodding. When I told her about the interview, she sat up straight. "Whoa, the Clem Lawler thing? How the fuck? Jeez, Matthew - I thought that was lost for posterity! Do you still have the link?"

Five minutes later, she was purring as I retrieved my tablet from the cabin and sent her the link. "Only interview I ever did. Wow am I glad I put my best researcher on the job! Better think up a big fat finder's bonus for him!"

I was feeling more confident thanks to her amazing honesty and candour. "The scene with Tanzi and Luke was bonus enough. Let's just say I was extremely jealous of him and for seventeen minutes and eight seconds I wanted to be him."

She snorted. "Be Luke Schneiderman? Shit, Matthew don't ever wish that on yourself. Grade-A asshole, believe me. Big dick, knew where to put it alright - but a bigger piece of shit never walked this earth. If I knew where the cunt was buried, I'd piss on his grave."

Surprised by her impassioned outburst, all I could manage was, "Whoa, how come?"

"Just a manipulative, violent piece of vermin. Took a liking to Tanzi and wanted her to have all sorts of shit done - tits, lips, nose-job - you name it. Poor kid nearly flipped and he threatened her so bad she almost quit. He was one of the reasons I got out. I didn't say it in the interview but he was the director who wanted a second dick in my ass and it was going to be his."

She closed her eyes and was silent for a long time. "Anyways, Tanzi moved to New York from the west coast still intact. I got out and he didn't last much longer in the biz. Still a fucking Grade-A asshole until the day he went downstairs." She laughed. "But itwas a Grade-A classic scene, wasn't it?"

I had to agree with her. "It sure was. Seems you liked Tanzi a lot?"

She nodded wistfully. "Still do. We hang out from time to time." Almost reading my thoughts, she added slyly, "And yes Matthew, we still do it - especially now I am a single girl once more!"

"Was she really your first off-camera?"

"Yeah, God's-honest! Been a few more since, especially on the road with Long Time Gone, but she was the first. But enough about me for a while. Let's talk Matthew Wilson, shall we? Find out what makes my new lockdown toy boy tick!"

She grinned. "Lockdown toy boy, I like it! Shame Glen's not around to re-record Rhinestone Cowboy!"

I groaned inwardly, both at her joke and having to talk about myself. "Not much to tell really. Grew up in various small towns in England. Dad moved here with his job when I was twelve. It's taken me most of that time to come to terms with it."

"You got there yet?"

I thought for a moment. "Not entirely. I still don't feel I fit in. I had to swap cricket and rugby for baseball and football and resented that for a long time."

"Any good at either?"

I laughed. "Well my pitching sucks because I've spent all my life making sure the ball bounces on the way to the batter. I was a decent kicker in rugby but didn't like getting hit, so guess where I ended up in football? My mantra is, 'Run fast, kick hard, run even faster.'"

Bella smiled. "Sound like wise words to me. You seem to like the quiet life up here, don't you?"

"I didn't at first. Just as I was getting used to a new life in the big city, Dad decided he needed a getaway, and this was the place. I just hated being so remote, so far away from my few new friends." I lowered my head. "He's kind of driven. Gets these ideas and goes with them without thinking of everyone floundering around in his wake. Dragged me and my Mum all over England, never settling. Then we came here, all to further his career."

"Yeah, strange. I get on fine with your Mom, but he always seems - I dunno, distant? Distracted?"

"Just about sums him up. Add driven, determined, blinkered and you're getting towards the truth. I've been a bit of a nomad all my life and it's only the last two or three years I've come to love this place." I looked around. "There's nowhere I'd rather be."

"Especially at the moment?" She had that wicked smile on her face once more.

I nodded slowly. "Especially at the moment."

She nodded back. "Me too, Matthew, me too."

Her next question floored me a little, but I should have expected it. "Girlfriend?"

The million-dollar question. Did I have a girlfriend? Emlee and I had kissed a few times at school parties and I liked her a lot, but we were not an item. I had fervently wished we were on many occasions but to no avail.

Bella laughed as I told her. "Oh poor Matthew. Is she cute?"

"Very."

"Carrying a torch for her."

I raised my right hand high with my fist clenched and we both laughed. "Could do without the braces, but yeah, she's a babe."

"How old?"

"Same as me - eighteen."

"Do you want to do the things to her you want to do to me?"

Now there was a question. "No, not really. I want to make out with her, yes. But... it's different. She's different. Sorry, Bella - that's just the way it is."

She held my gaze. "No apologies needed, Matthew. We are what we are. I'm a sexual predator - an adventurer. I am fifty-one years old and I have been pushing the boundaries for a long time. I did what I did because I loved it - still do. I know why I was put on God's Green Earth, and I intend to make the most of it as long as I can."

She leaned towards me and lowered her voice. "So when this is all over and you go back home, use all the things I will teach you in the next few weeks to make Emlee's first time a lot more memorable than most girls her age. Slow and gentle, yeah? Make sure she is calling your name with her legs wrapped tightly around your butt as she comes. Kiss her tenderly and tell her it was the best thing ever. Promise me?"

"Seems a long way off, but if it happens, I promise, Bella."

"Good boy - and it will happen. Trust me. Oh and Matthew..."

"Yes Bella?"

"Wait until she's had her braces off before you come in her mouth. Poor kid will be brushing her teeth for weeks elsewise!"

This woman was incredible. She had the knack of making things almost unbearable before bringing in a human element and making us laugh. I had no idea what the next few weeks were going to entail, but I had no doubt it was going to be the time of my life. "Hopefully, I can bring her back next year as a 'thank you' to a lovely lady?"

"No dear boy. If she got together with me, she'd be setting up a webcam show within a week and she'd have made more than my ninety-three features before she's twenty."

"Point taken. Anyway, that's about it for me. Not much else to say really."

"Apart from your lust for a fifty-one-year-old ex-porn star who you just so happen to be locked down with for an unspecified time?"

Hearing her say that sort of thing should have terrified me, but she had a way of making it seem so natural that I was completely relaxed in her company. "Yes, apart from that of course."

"So, you have a torch for this Emlee in your right hand and another for me in your left. Must make evenings rather uncomfortable!"

"I put them down from time to time."

"I know - I've seen evidence. So, you got a thing for older women generally?"

"No, just beautiful ones."

"Good answer. Go on."

"I... I don't know how to put it. There's just something about you. A poise, an elegance, a grace in the way you move. The sway of your hair, the tightness of your perfect body. Then there's..." I trailed off into silence.

"Then there's the porn star looks, the cocksucker's mouth, the cock-tease poses and the hard stares?"

"I'm glad you said it."

"Only saying what's true. How many times you reckon you've jacked off to me, Matthew?"

I closed my eyes, feeling myself reddening once more. I hoped she'd bring this one back to earth by making us laugh. "A lot."

"Good to hear. Glad I still got it. Just a few more days, Matthew. Just a few more days then I'll be jacking you off." She pointed to her mouth, her breasts, her tummy. "Here, here, here. Anywhere you want. I have to admit I've been a little quiet on that front since Chuck left. We had some good times on the road, and we got up to some crazy shit. Since then I've been a little less... active than I usually am. Had a quiet year last year - for the most part, just me and my toys out here in the wilderness. A few weekends with Tanzi and some other old friends here and there. Just needed some familiarity and to take stock a little."

She gave me her look. "But my self-imposed exile is almost over. As with you, Matthew, I don't see age. I just see guys - and occasionally gals like Tanzi - that I like. I reckon the age range I have covered with my lovers must be at least fifty years. As you wisely said earlier - I don't see young, old, middle aged, whatever. I just see lovers I can share a good time with. And I do share, Matthew. I assure you I am a very generous lover."

She waved her hand indicating the distance between us. "Hell, if it weren't for this quarantine, I'd be down on my knees in front of you now."

I wanted nothing more. "Damn this bloody virus and quarantine."

"Hey, it may be a bastard, but without it we would not be where we are, would we? Some folk are getting hit hard. For us, it's an opportunity. So we gotta wait a little. All good things, Matthew. And believe me, when it comes, it's gonna be fucking good."

"Yeah, you're right of course." I had no doubt in my mind and I couldn't wait. I didn't know what else to say, so I changed the subject slightly. "Why would anyone leave someone like you, Bella? He must be crazy."

She let out a harsh little laugh. "We both were. As I said, we had some wild times out there. Wanna know?"

I nodded.

"Ok - short version. Me and one of the backing singers used to entertain the guys on the bus before they all piled in. Another younger girl. Shoulda known it was trouble brewing. Patti was her name. Patti Graves. Ring any bells from your research?"

I nodded again. The singer her ex-husband had taken up with.

"She not only got the lead singer's job in front of me, she done stole my man!" She put on a Southern twang. "If we had been a country band and not blues, she'd have probably shot ma dawg for good measure!"

At least she could laugh at the situation. "I'm sorry - what happened if you don't mind me asking?"

"Ah, it was falling apart, Matthew. Had been for years. I knew they were an item on the road when I stopped touring. We were both as bad as each other. Leopards can't change their spots. I could live with losing Chuck to her, but the singer's job was a biggie."

I said I had read in her bio that she had sung on some tracks on the band's first album.

"Yeah, it was Chuck's intention I was going to be lead vocalist. It was going well, but after we cut a couple of tracks the record company got wind of it. Said they didn't like the idea of an ex-porn star fronting a band." She pulled a face and lowered her voice to a deep rumble. "'Bad for the company's image'. Chuck struck a deal that he'd re-record the tracks as duets and keep some of my stuff on there. He did the rest of the album then Patti took over for the second."

"Jeez, Bella - that's rough. These days it would probably go platinum!"

"Yeah, too right!" She finished her coffee. "So, my life of porn was behind me, my life of sex and drugs and rock and roll was behind me - not that I partook in the drugs part, mind you."

I was mildly surprised to say the least. "I thought it was almost part of the deal?"

"For some, yeah. Not for Tiffany or Bella. Or Chuck for that matter. He's been a wild guy, but like his great hero Frank Zappa, it was strictly no drugs in the band. I saw what it did to a lot of people - Tanzi for one. I like being in control of myself - well, apart from in the sack, anyways!" She let out a long exhalation of breath. "I'm pretty sure that if I had been high when they tried to get me to do the double-ass thing, I'd have let them. And I'm equally sure if I had, I'd probably now be carrying drinks to craps tables back in Vegas, hiding my track marks and blowing low-lives for increasingly small denomination banknotes."

She stood and stretched herself like a cat in the morning sun before fixing me with her hardest stare. "So, still wanna sample the goods after all that?"

I stood myself, wishing I could close the short distance between us and take her in my arms. "Yes, Arabella 'Tiffany Goodnite' DeLorenzo-Hanson, I do. So much more now. I am so scared I can barely stop shaking and I am so excited I'll probably lose my load involuntarily as I walk down to the fishing spot."

She put her hand out as if she wanted me to take it. "Don't be scared, Matthew. We'll just be doing what comes naturally."

"Yes, but..."

She put a finger to her lips. "Shh - no buts. No ifs, no maybes. I'm not expecting you to perform like Luke Schneiderman, but at least you'll perform like a human being. It's gonna be great, Matthew. It's gonna be a wild ride, but little by little, we are going to do everything I did in those stills and movies together. We've got time. We can take it as slow or as fast as we need to. Anything you want, hear me?"

I took a deep breath and swallowed. "Yes, I hear you, Bella. Oh my God, I can't believe this is happening!"

"Oh it is young man - you better believe! Now - I need to work out and you are not going to watch. You are going down to the lake to catch fish. I'm bringing showtime forward an hour tonight. I want it to be a little lighter so you can see it all up close and personal. I'll set a chair up for you on the back porch. Bring beer, bring tissues. Wear only shorts. No underwear, no top. Tonight I get to watch you as well. Got all that?"

Watch me as well? That close? I nearly lost my load there and then. "Yes Bella."

"Good - see you at seven-thirty. Safe distance at all times. Even Luke couldn't shoot that far, so I should be safe!"

Grinning, she turned to go and I began my walk down to the fishing area feeling very uncomfortable indeed. But of course with Bella, there was always a last word.

"Oh and Matthew?"

I turned and her hands were on her hips and her tongue was back in her cheek. It reminded me of the bulge the guy's erection had made in the first few shots I had seen of her in action.

"Yes Bella?"

She smiled archly. "Oh just look at that poor thing straining at the zip of your shorts! I'll allow you to pop one out down at the fishing spot." Once again, she turned away, flicking her hand in the air nonchalantly. "Send pictures or no show later!"

She got her pictures alright, but they were much earlier than I had hoped for. I just prayed I'd last longer when it was all for real.

Chapter Four - Tickled and Teased

She was already in position when I let myself in through the gate alongside her cabin. There was a table beside her chair with a wine glass and a bottle of red on it. Something else was covered by a brightly coloured napkin. My chair was set up directly opposite a few feet away, the table next to it empty. Bella sat looking intently at a Kindle in her lap. She was wearing thick rimmed glasses that looked amazing on her. Her only other attire was a sleek, black silky robe and her hair was down over her left shoulder. Her long legs were crossed, giving me a very graphic view of the smooth, tanned skin of her left upper thigh. She didn't look a day over thirty.

I crossed the intervening distance with my heart pounding and placed two beer bottles and a box of tissues on the table. Ignoring me completely, she poured herself a glass of wine and went on reading. As long minutes passed and my discomfort grew, she put down her Kindle, took a sip of wine and looked up at last, removing her glasses and sucking on the stem for a moment.

"Sorry, I do get caught up in a good book." She glanced at my beer bottles. "Two? Well, there's confidence!" Smiling at my now palpable discomfort, she went on. "Oh, poor Matthew. I have you on my hook and I am reeling you in slowly, slowly. Dear old Abe Aaronson once told me that you have to play with your catch. Tickle it, get it interested. He's been fishing for over sixty years, so only right I pay attention to him. Don't you agree?"

Abe was correct and I didn't dare disagree. "Yes Bella. Just don't bang me over the head when I land."

She laughed. "Oh you are such a lovely boy - I'll certainly bang something!" She straightened up and smoothed out her robe. "Ok, here's how tonight is going to play out. As we are much closer to one another this evening, I hope you will hear the lovely liquid noises I make. You may even catch a tantalising whiff of my intoxicating aroma! All my little moans and sighs will be unamplified and not lost over distance or distorted by electronic intervention." She gave a cute, girly giggle completely at odds with her appearance. "Sort of like Long Time Gone's acoustic set in mid-gig!"

She stood and her robe fell open. My stomach lurched as she pulled it back and I saw her breasts from only a few feet away for the first time, not through binoculars or on a screen. She held them as if appraising them herself. "Not bad for over half a century, huh? 'All natural' as the modern websites like to say." She squeezed her nipples and I longed to run my tongue over the thick, fleshy buds.

"Ok, tonight's little house rules. Your hands stay on the chair-arms until you are told otherwise. When I nod, you may drink. You may not touch yourself or speak a word. I won't ask if you understand because it's fairly fucking simple. Sorry Matthew - that's another thing. When I am aroused, I become a right fucking potty-mouth. I talk dirty. I am fucking-well aroused now, and if it is ok with you, I am going to sit back down, put my legs over the arms of this fucking chair and play with my soaking wet cunt until I fetch off screaming. If you like the sound of that, take a sip of beer."

She sat back down and began to do exactly as she had said. She was neatly trimmed down below and I could see a vivid red gash giving me a perfectly shaped vertical smile from beneath the silky hair, every bit as raven black as that on her head. It was all I could do not to tip the whole bottle down my throat. The glass clicked against my teeth as I held it to my mouth and my erection strained against the hard material of my shorts with no underwear to cushion the sensation. I put the bottle back down, gripped the chair arms and watched for fifteen minutes as a fifty-one year old ex-porn star gave an eighteen-year-old boy a private showing that would have had every straight man on the planet on his knees within seconds.

The sounds alone made me want to dive in and join her, but overlaid by her gutter language, her utter profanity and the sheer gusto with which she went about her work left me absolutely spellbound. I had to keep pinching myself that this was real and happening to me. The close proximity and my inability to do anything about it made it all the harder. It took every ounce of willpower I possessed not to tear my hands from the chair arms, rip off my shorts and wrestle her to the ground. It would have been a very short wrestling match had I been able.