Mess Made on the Baroness' Bed, The

As I mentioned in the introduction to this tale, I never once revealed to anybody that I was present alongside the goblin burglar that night, at first for simply fear that I would be put on trial for my trespass if I even so much as breathed a word of my involvement to somebody not as trustworthy as initially assumed, although once the more seedier specifics of the caper - including the foul little goblin soiling the noblelady's pillow and absolute degenerate of a man watching the whole thing with his prick out and erect - leaked one way or another to the general masses and passed into infamy (I suppose the Baroness did not pay her manor guards enough to keep their lips tight about the going ons in her home), I doubled down on keeping mum lest I would not only find myself prosecuted, but also mocked until the day my sentence would be carried out, with my entire legacy being boiled down to an amusingly appalling footnote in Forgdan's history books, having to settle instead to endure the cringing I would go whenever I would overhear yet another retelling of the account.

I believe that to be as good a point as any to end my story, though with the little ink I have left to me, I will sum up all that has transpired since. Those unfamiliar with Forgdanshire might be pleased to hear that things have substantially improved within our county since the days this chronicle took place. Not too terribly long after the adventure, Baroness Hearmin was eventually stripped of her titles and land due to misconduct, and as much as I would prefer to truthfully state proper justice was served for her corruption and exploitation of her subjects, she was allegedly only ever impeached for being found for an affair she was having with the husband of a particularly spiteful noblewoman higher up on the hierarchy than she, although I will hardly complain so long as Forgdanshire never has to endure the likes of her in power ever again.

Replacing the Baroness in her position was somebody from a branch in her family tree - a cousin or some such - and although I would be hesitant to describe them as the most competent of commissioners, the standard of living has improved a significantly since they had taken office, mostly in part to them reinstating the original, more reasonable rates of our taxes, as well as a general lack of ambition to try taking advantage of their status for self-centred gain. Nowadays, I am a happily married family man who plies a more honest trade; one I intend to keep up until retirement. While I am still not exactly living in the lap of luxury, I find life as it is comfortable enough, and I am especially grateful for it after what I had come from to get here...even if things can get a little dull from time to time.

Although for as close as me and my own dear wife are, even she is completely unaware of what was (said without the slightest disrespect intended to the time I have been with her) probably the most exciting night of my entire life which I had just recounted, and I hope it stays that way! However, I have to confess that I risk her discovering this secret every day, for I still hang onto one of Min's wanted posters as a memento, tucked away in a secret nook known only to myself, and which I occasionally take a peek at now and then whenever I am in the mood to reminisce of younger, wilder days.