All Comments on 'My Meeting'

by arsawyer

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  • 115 Comments
TajfaTajfaover 1 year ago

Great but wanted more.

HargaHargaover 1 year ago

Sorry, not worth rating.

SwordWielderSwordWielderover 1 year ago

Pretty boy nephew is looking at some serious jail time, loss of family, loss of income, and probably will be made to service other guys in jail. Chances are he probably won't last the length of his imprisonment. Thank you Karma!

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Another half-assed story from another lazy writer, not to mention the cliches again. I gave the writer a half assed score for a half assed effort.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Need an epilogue, or a permission from you so that others can write they're ending

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Good what there was of it, but I don't particularly care for unfinished stories.

bobareenobobareenoover 1 year ago

And because of the assault and battery the counterclaim was better than the initial suit. This tale is neither plausible nor a good read.

CHUCK2468CHUCK2468over 1 year ago

Was really enjoying this story until the ending. Why stop at the good stuff? What happened? Where's the aftermath? Can only a 3*.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Unfinished

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Very good. But why wouldn't wifey catch on that she had a new phone? Yes, I get that hubby got an identical phone to substitute for her burner phone, but it would seem she has been receiving texts and emails on the burner. Somehow I think she would catch on to the fact that it isn't her burner. But that's a nitpick; I gave it 5*****. I do think this would have made a very good longer story to develop into a more complete and rounded tale.

BSreaderBSreaderover 1 year ago
Interesting

But unfinished

JustloosenmrJustloosenmrover 1 year ago

Follow up story please, interesting plot and curious where this will go?

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Pathetic

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

You and the chicken shit loveofmyLife75 who refuses to allow comments or feedback NEED to edit!

Legio_Patria_NostraLegio_Patria_Nostraover 1 year ago

BTA (Burn Them All)!! The writing is tight, neat and very readable. None of the extraneous stuff you normally read here (I'm guilty of that, too)! Several very nice plot twists! 5++/5!!

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Isn’t English your first language? Or is it that you just don’t care if your spelling, language and style of writing is so crappy?

Mac_LapuMac_Lapuover 1 year ago

Good one.

But not enough.

You left out the good part that should have been the after that office showdown.

Be kind enough and kindly write a sequel or epilogue please.

Thank you arsawyer.

AutistAdventurerAutistAdventurerover 1 year ago

your grammar and homophone errors were so bad I had to work out, several times, what you were trying. It's clear that you're using a simple spell checker that doesn't do a deeper analysis, use google docs, it will pick up on these errors.

Boyd PercyBoyd Percyover 1 year ago

Don't you love when a plan comes together!

5

far_wanderer1984far_wanderer1984over 1 year ago

Great potential just needs finishing.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Unfinished

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Thanks for submitting. This was good but I would like to know what the outcomes were.

Tiger27Tiger27over 1 year ago

Great story!

I know it won't happen, but would you write an epilogue or afterward?

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Would have been a 5 star if you had continued the story. Liked the change from the usual.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Needs the results published

demanderdemanderover 1 year ago

Not much of an explanation on her part. D

Well8Well8over 1 year ago

Needs a part two could be reconciled or not but a part two be cool

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Total nothing. Uninteresting story written boringly, with usual bag of unbelievable help from a "friend" that every poor author relies upon.

GamblnluckGamblnluckover 1 year ago

is this part 1? You just dropped it.

BeBopper99BeBopper99over 1 year ago

4 Where's the rest of the story?

Rayjag1980Rayjag1980over 1 year ago

Good short story.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

A nice antidote to tne tsunami of cuck crap the last few months.

.

As is usual with a well done short tale, a desire for more detail is triggered. E. G., we know relatively little about the state of the relationship our MC had with his wife..although her reaction to being found out certainly suggested that mentally she had moved on. As well..more detail about who his assistant was and how they managed to so thoroughly expose all the sex ANDA business rot would have been interesting. Finally…it’s always entertaining to learn how a couple’s kids reaction to a marriage destruction.

.

That said…still very well done.

.

4 very strong ****

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

It was okay for a very short story, but nothing particularly interesting or novel…just average. I presume that the author was appealing to the BTB crowd, who will rush to shale his hand, given that he saw down and wrote this story.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

I'm trying to picture how this story could be worse, and despite having a pretty good imagination, am coming up empty. Completely unimaginative, basic spelling/grammar mistakes, badly crafted and utterly unrealistic. I mean, you do know that the "hero" is about to spend years in jail for his little stunt, and that there's no basis whatsoever for suing the company, right?

.

You should wait until you finish 6th grade (might take a couple of tries) before writing your next little recess-fantasy.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Excellent, a QuickMagazine 5. To the point, though the beatdown could expose the MMC to legal jeopardy. Might have been a better move to forego that particular satisfaction, since the trade-off might be having to drop his suit against the company in exchange for no assault charge. Of course, his "assistant" could testify that the beating came from the soon-to-be-ex, enraged when she learns Jim played her for a fool. So maybe our hero can have his beatdown and eat it too.

thecarolinadreamerthecarolinadreamerover 1 year ago

Not a bad story but somehow it just seems incomplete. Needs more about wife's life going forward, more about MC's problems due to his actions Ect. As is Mc's actions just not believable. Still, I enjoyed the story. Thanks! cd

SithLord6969SithLord6969over 1 year ago

Excellent story. 5 stars and a fave!

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Getting there, just ended feeling a little unfinished.

JayZipJayZipover 1 year ago

Fun!

If you want criticism, it seemed a little unrealistic when the "assistant" turned out to be a lawyer. He was very quiet when our narrator started committing a felony (beating the boss). Made more sense (to me) to think of him as a henchman / process server.

Then the last couple paragraphs happen confusingly fast, when Mr Collins comes in.

Still fun!

Mibal_ZahariMibal_Zahariover 1 year ago

It's still assault and battery. The MC is going to do time. A decent prosecutor will get him for assault as he did make overt threats and battery as it was intentional infliction of bodily harm. If the prosecutor wanted to as well could charge with premeditated attempted murder depending on the injuries as this planned. The lawyer could not do anything to help his client as he is an officer of the court and compelled to give witness which may force him to recuse himself from everything.

In the end, the nephew may get terminated but no charges as it is a family matter, and it was not really theft as the company did get a profit from the sales, just not as big a margin. The recordings were done without all party's knowledge so is inadmissible. The wife gets a restraining order locking the husband out of the house fearing for her life based on the assault. The MC gets divorced while in jail with a sympathetic judge giving her everything. And the MC is having loads of unwanted prison sex just because the author failed to have the lothario throw the first punch so it could be self defense.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Nice short story, but it had more potential than you gave it. You write well and creatively with a directness many others don't seem to have. Thank you for a really nice short story.

animalmusicanimalmusicover 1 year ago

Needs more, keep going

BigBlueKatBigBlueKatover 1 year ago

Good premise, but you failed to finish the story. 3/5

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

You can't end it there, just when the shi t hits the fan....

t8ntliklyt8ntliklyover 1 year ago

All I'll say is that this story is your fantasy for sure. Naa that's not all I'm going to say. It is poorly written for one, did your 'assistant' help you with that? Any lawyer 'assistant' wouldn't let the guy beat the other guy either.

0*

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

It's good but mo ending. I hate that

LickideesplitLickideesplitover 1 year ago

Too many skipped, misused or misspelled words. Worse, when did the author establish that Big Boss and Hubby knew each other, on sight, by name? The feasibility of the beating was a shock until the Hubby/BB & the skimming were exposed. It was also a shock when Sweetie became offended by Juniors misrepresentation of their average frequency. For her to quickly adjust to the unlikely circumstances as to be frank about getting boned by Jr. thrice (or more) than she allowed Hubby was very unlikely … and unwise!

3* (with a little care - such as ‘assistant’ applied - I woulda scored it higher.

BlueEyd2BlueEyd2over 1 year ago

No indication of a follow-on chapter, so if this is it, 3 stars. No real ending, Good start,

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Now those are consequences that I enjoy reading!

LickideesplitLickideesplitover 1 year ago

Addendum

It is also left hanging whether Sweetie is in line as accessory to grand larceny. Prison time? Probably more important than divorce from Hubby, who has recently become inconvenient & and is now untenable.

ttt59ttt59over 1 year ago

Not sure why reactions are so negative. Nice little story about husband with some pride and backbone setting things straight. You could write a follow up but not necessary. Anyone with half a brain can figure out how this will end up!

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Good, not great. Too many things hanging. LP

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Good premise. Really shitty execution. Grammar, tense, spelling, etc. Did u try reading this aloud since you have no editor? 2 for effort.

muskyboymuskyboyover 1 year ago

"Story does not have any tags" -use some tags. Most people want to avoid this cuck shit. This story has been done, and overdone, thousands of times. This one is no better. 6 months....?

LT56linebackerLT56linebackerover 1 year ago

Good story.4 stars, the Bear approves. But it needs a part 2. The bitch is still breathing. Keep writing.

The BEAR

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Definitely needs a pt2. Interesting twist at the end.

SeafoamzoneSeafoamzoneover 1 year ago

Great story, I gave it 4 stars. Somewhat original approach to this theme but just need some more interaction with the wife.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

You NEED an editor, and to get help to write better stories...

...this one was virtually unreadable !

sdc97230sdc97230over 1 year ago
The lawsuits were illogical and unnecessary

There are only six states in the US where you can sue your cheating spouse's lover for "destroying your marriage," and no states where you have the necessary standing to be able to hold the lover's employer liable for his behavior. Also, once the "assistant" served the big boss with a lawsuit, he would be legally unable to represent the boss or the company in any capacity.

And the story didn't really require any lawsuits. Just serve the cheating wife her divorce papers, hand the big boss evidence that his nephew is engaging in illegal business practices and inform him that you have shared that evidence with his customers, his competitors and any appropriate state or federal agencies, and lover boy is doomed.

TrustingagainTrustingagainover 1 year ago

A very interesting story indeed.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

That really was poorly written crap.

Deprived891Deprived891over 1 year ago

Seem short, need more added to it.

jflindersjflindersover 1 year ago

The lawyer who is suing the company for allowing the affair to happen offering to represent the company against the main character's wife's lover was too far over the top for me.

ImpossiblefutureImpossiblefutureover 1 year ago

Would been 5 but the spelling errors were horrendous, line after line of stupid idiot spelling errors, back in the old day site would have rejected such poor quality, clean it or clear out if you can't improve on your spelling mistakes which seems to be a common thing with your stories then give up. Do yourself a favour and use spell checker and get it proof read by someone that can see this basic child errors

kirei8kirei8over 1 year ago

Not worth discussing. MC will do time for the beating, wife will make out like a bandit, and lover boy will counter sue. Stupid story.

26thNC26thNCover 1 year ago

Good story for what you gave us. It needs fleshing out and a definitive ending.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Good to see that the MC isn't a humiliated cuck. Story seemed too short with a open ending that you or others might want to create. There were a few obvious editorial errors so a second proof reading by an outside party would be a good idea for future submissions.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Today you can't protect your family like you could years ago. I do remember my friends uncle who beat the Hell out of a guy trying to seduce his wife. The guys wife sued him and he also lost his job. It should still be like that.

OPrimeOPrimeover 1 year ago

And, wrapping things up...?

ribnitinribnitinover 1 year ago

good idea but has sloppy execution.

iammweaseliammweaselover 1 year ago

Well we have a badly written cliche. It isnt so much a story as just a long cliche.

You won over the easily impressed with the "tough guy" crap, but beyond them I doubt many will cheer this rather lazy Frankenstein of a story.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

That is what is known as going nuclear on their collective arses. 5*

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Good story, BUT the rushed.

Need to expand the ending , for the conclusion. it may be obvious its needed for the emotional impact.

Telling the kids & parents what the slut did and her reaction.

His lawyer can't represent the uncle as that is a conflict of interest.

The best part of the story is not the detailed sex but the emotions of the caricatures within the story.

If that is missing then the story is flat or unappealing.

OOAAOOAAover 1 year ago

Fantastic story!!!

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

That was pretty good. Family, so maybe the nephew and wife go to jail maybe not. Maybe the husband goes to jail for beating the crap out of the nephew or maybe not. Hubby gets his divorce.

I like it. Four Stars.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Great reporting on method and technique, timing, legal issues. But maybe you might consider adding something about the human element? Apparently the wife had become romantically involved to the point where she is now an accomplice to the embezzlement? And her commitment to her husband and her marriage is so shallow and stilted that she can only be a true sexual partner and lover to this asshole who's playing her like a cheap drum? Was the wife always that mentally dysfunctional? Did any of the wife's friends know? How did all the people at the company know? How did this scum get away fucking all these married women? Was this husband somehow the first one to figure it out? What were the messages and texts and phone calls he intercepted that alerted him that his was was in a Love affair, not just recreational sex? And all their marriage she has disliked the sex because his cock is larger than she is comfortable with, but the husband never knew and the wife never made any attempt to find some solution? Yeah, yeah, I know; not what you wanted to write about. You might as well write about a war without bothering to explain what the war is about. Just describe all the neat missiles and bombs and equipment; who cares about the people? What an opportunity missed. But thanks for the effort.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

"Now what a second," Yeah, what a second, indeed. And that was just one of many errors. Please proofread, or find yourself an editor.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Good story. Atrocious editing.

BuzzCzarBuzzCzarover 1 year ago

A very weak person's idea of displaying strength. There are some sad, damaged people that read/comment here. Poorly executed, poorly thought out fantasy story. 2*, and that's generous.

OverconfidentSarcasmOverconfidentSarcasmover 1 year ago

Nice idea, horrible execution.

Why did you put "assistant" in quotes twenty times? Your MC never introduced him, and the first time he spoke himself, it was to tell Loverboy that he was an attorney. No need to play around.

How did your MC IMMEDIATELY plan to confront the wife's bosses for allowing it to happen, when at that point, he had no idea who her lover was, yet?

And what's with all those typos, the comma-horror, and the weird language?

Demosthenes384bcDemosthenes384bcover 1 year ago

You heard what Bear said -LOL! I feel cheated that you skipped all the plot lines involved in collecting the evidence. Now don’t cheat us in how this shit show plays out. (Nice touch on the embezzlement piece) 4*

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Very Good

ImNotanAnonImNotanAnonover 1 year ago

1* for no epilogue. When will these writers learn?

KRD19254KRD19254over 1 year ago

Would have been much better but for the grammar or typo's.

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Also the beating of Jim-the-jerk just did not fit and should have gotten the husband arrested nullifying his case(s). Just dumb vengeance since it looks like he was going for the gold; and an officer of the court witnessing this violent act would not help the cases.

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Was Jim that fearful of the husband to willfully make this confession in front of a witness/unknown-lawyer? Just too stupid a move to be real - is arrogance is one thing but this!@#$&*

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I see to many typical rookie writer mistakes - trying to tick off all the LW BTB boxes - making a fantasy and screwing up a successful revenge plot.

\

2.9**, hooyah

katibkatibover 1 year ago

Nice concept or story line but poor execution. Start with basic grammar.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

I assume you dictated this story given the misuse of words, poor spelling and poor grammar. The story lacked any imagination or interest...

Evah_Rheddy

towgtowgover 1 year ago

Decent plot and story line. Get an editor.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

It stinks, just like the rest of your writing.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Doesn't make any sense.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

I loved the way you ended the story. I hope to see a follow up.

OPrimeOPrimeover 1 year ago

Make them hurt.

vickitvohiovickitvohioover 1 year ago

gave you a 5* review. it should have been longer though

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago
Only three stars

Only three stars. It had the bones of a good story, reasonable first part, quite good second part, (but as most of your stories) seems that you forgot an ending.

Shame, as it could possibly have rated five stars...

tomol111tomol111over 1 year ago

More please...these stories need more detail

Bargyn1Bargyn1over 1 year ago

A fey typo's, dissapointing ending.

jbpeters74jbpeters74over 1 year ago

I am not sure I like the latest trend on the site, a lot of stories ending at the paramount of the story. Finish the story it only take maybe 1 more paragraph. Otherwise good story, but I think you could have done more with it.

mstbdscrt1957mstbdscrt1957over 1 year ago

Needed better ending.

12
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