All Comments on 'Paying the Piper'

I give this tale a strong 4. It provoked an emotional response, was well-written (except for the sex action which did not flow well).

Nevertheless, I sense that those evaluating the story provide a grade or rating based on their emotional response to individual characters, specifically the outrageous betrayal carried out by the wife. That ,Amy be all well and good, but these emotional responses contribute to fair evaluation of the,work, and of the writer. It embarrasses me that there are so many, so very-limited retards that allow their emotion to demonstrably attack the writer, ESPECIALLY IN THIS INSTANCE.

Well done, thoroughly enjoyed the set up and conclusion.

Thanks

Depression, among other conditions, can and does lead to suicide much too often. Certainly the breakup of a marriage can be a factor in depression. This suicide wasn't like that; it was chosen by a supposedly intelligent man as the best option for his children. Of all the perverted thinking on this website, that is easily the most foul idea here.

.

Even if he achieved his goal of having the children mourning their father and moving on, dropping his revenge bomb after they are grown up does nothing good to their lives. They lost one parent and now they will hate the one they have left. They may even grow to hate their deceased father for literally abandoning them.

.

I am sure it has been pointed out (maybe even by myself) that the Statute of Limitations for criminal charges doesn't mean you get to keep money gained through fraud.

Sad story. I can say first hand when something like this happens to a man there is anger, hatred, and a feeling of loss. When those subside what is left is sadness, extreme sadness. The sadness will stay for decades, perhaps my entire life. I certainly can vouch for feelings of suicide.

Like many stories in the Loving Wives category, this story had its share of emotional roller coasters. While I thought Ricks revenge was creative, I mostly found it unrealistic at best. ttt59 has a comfortable flow with his/her writing and often writes characters very well. I have a hard time believing that Cindy’s betrayal, as horrific as it was, would push a man of his character (as he was written) to that ridiculous decision. I would think his love for his children would outweigh everything else.

I knew as soon as she spread her legs, this would not end well. The cunt had no morals, no conscience, no inherent sense of dignity. all about her. She did it because she could. Vows meant nothing, promises were mere words ( and not necessarily words she understood) Al the cheaters use the same vocabulary. Guys just are not capable of phrasing them. I'm sorry he died, but at least he paid them back. The only thing missing was more physical damage to the two of them. (Sorry, my own personal feelings.) The Bear pretty much approves, but I can only give you 4 stars.

The BEAR

A very sad story, to bad he couldn't have found a better way for himself and the kids. By the by, I've always loved Edger Allen Poe my favorite has always been "Annabelle Lee" so sad so beautiful.

I gave it 5*****. That said, despite what some so-called experts claim, suicide is not a man's way out of this horror show that the slut created. There were so many many ways that things may not have worked out for his children. The inherent selfishness and absolute lack of morals that his wife displayed made it uncertain at best that she would do a good job of raising his children before they became adults. His absence meant there was really no one in a position to make sure the children were safe and properly raised. He was their father; his duty was to them and only then to himself. No, he need not, and indeed should not, have reconciled with the slut.

But there were alternatives to death that allowed him to be around and make sure his children had a living parent who would not slut it up, end up with some asshole and be the victims of that sort of shit show.

Finally, I know he was hurt very badly, but honestly, the cheating slut was not worth the his death and depriving his children of a father, even if there was a nasty divorce.

Uhhh, in California and probably all other states, the statute of limitations for civil fraud starts to run from the date of discovery of such fraud. In other words, the statute of limitations for insurance fraud has not yet run and the insurance companies would have no legal problem in seeking damages in the form of the insurance pay-out to the children. The children have no liability but the funds put in trust for them would be subject to a lawsuit for damages for the fraud. And if they could prove the slut knew of the insurance fraud (as in fact she did), she would be liable for the fraud as well.

I lost my father when I was a child, and it is the worst thing that has ever happened to me. I am now 33 and it still is incredibly painful. I completely disagree with the concept that death is better than divorce. That aside, I enjoyed the story. Keep up the good work.

A good story, not sure about death being easier to overcome than divorce; to the author, ignore the negative comments, there are more of us who appreciate your efforts, freely given, keep up the good work. To anonymous, ask a grown up what the difference is between fact and fiction

I’ve often considered this route for SWIB stories, and in real life. Is it really better to life but be broken or empty inside? Debatable I guess. 5/5

Nato_

Pathetic story

Rick was correct that the death of a parent, while devastating, does less emotional damage to children than divorce. Initially, his decision seemed a noble sacrifice to spare his children. It had the added benefit of heaping enormous guilt on the slut. Then, he had to make sure to his children were told the truth, ensuring unimaginable emotional pain and damage for them. At that point, it was clear Rick was not remotely concerned about his childrens' welfare. He simply saw them as a way to maximize his revenge on the slut .. and cared nothing about the damage to them.

In the final analysis, she was a worthless, faithless piece of shit, and he was orders of magnitude worse. Neither of the assholes gave a damn about the harm they exposed their children to. A tale of 2 monsters.

My second reading and I have appreciated your efforts more this time than originally. A really great read and worth 5 stars every day

That was really quite silly. Among so much else that require some serious suspension of disbelief, I really choked on the Santa Barbara News Press publishing his libel.

What bullshit! Cindy is the one who should of died not innocent Rick! As for death verse divorce, many children have lived through their parents divorce and turned out ok. Rick is no longer around to interact with his kids. That is more devastating.

Hope for sequel

That ending…I think I tore the sockets of my eyes considering how hard they were rolling. My response to this story is a certain speech from Billy Madison . Good day

The writing is well done. The story is crap. What sort of weak person would do this to their children?

Should be alternate ending where in 12 years time shes sat in a bar and swears she spots the ghost of rick walking out the door with someone looking very much like lori… he turns back to her and smiles… cut to black

What happened to BE?

5* an amazing story

Sad but truthful

Sometimes death is more fruitful and less painful to your loved ones, parents & children.... Than the life after an ugly divorce.

Life is a lifelong promise with death.... A truth

Divorce is a cheating & betrayal with marriage..A lie

Choices of life

Heart touching

yeah but what model car was he driving?

I enjoyed the story, it was really good. However, and I am sure others have stated, you need to reread your material better. Wrong names given to the wrong people, such as Thomas or Thompson? Rick or Brad. Do not worry, I have seen other authors do this too!

Thanks for your Writing.

Wow, got to really worry about *her*...

Not because he's about to totally blow her life out of the water but because, unlike so many other LWs, she had REPEATED opportunities before she destroyed her marriage to do something about it.

Lori warned her. She continued.

Lori warned him. He continued.

When Lori quit, she had an opportunity for a wake up. They continued.

She failed so often I hope she lives to a ripe old age knowing her children hate her, her in-laws hate her, their friends hate her, and her parents are so deeply ashamed of her they seldom, if ever, see her again.

Terribly sad with great storytelling and realistic dialogue. Three stars ⭐️ for Rick’s suicide and vindictiveness.

This is probably one of the best stories I have read on this site. Especially, the details and following the storyline to a tee. You definitely should pitch this story as a movie or even a series. This is the kind of story that women (and some men) would love to see. The best part of the story has to be the when the piper has the last word. A 5+..........

I hate self-punishing husbands. His kids would certainly have been better with divorce over death. He should have dumped her and found a better woman. They are out there. I've read this before and hated the ending, still do. 4*s though for trying something new.

Wow that is a heavy story. Brilliantly written. The standard of this work is that I feel shellshocked by the images I am left with. So many poignant emotions. Lets see more from this author.

Vindictivness yes, suicide always no

Yes, a parent dying is better for the children than divorce. SHE should have been the one to die!!! He had a responsibility to not let his children be raised by a vile, immoral, witch!

ZK

A different ending then I would have thought. OK for a one off. Wouldn't want to see this as common.

I disagree Scorp, death for a child is overwhelming but not as damaging as parents divorcing they start with hating each parent, usually used as weapons by one side or the other and not always intentional either, then they blame themselves for silly things kids do. This creates a mistrust later on in life not always but documented cases do show nearly 80% of those coming from a divorce where one parents cheats does cause those children usually at the younger age to reflect on that and thus they either cheat or mistrust their spouses so much that they themselves become divorced a vicous circle never breaking. Plus your comment you read this before and hated it still do, yet then commend on trying something new, strange that one, like winning the lottery without ever playing it....

To the author of this writings was very deep and dark, well thought out and to be honest the best punishment he could ever do, divorce and show the world your not adequate in keeping a spouse happy, stay with her shows the world your a cuck, option 3 that took a lot of guts and thinking about your kids future as yours is already destroyed. Taking his own life while making it look an accident, just to provide for his kids was a real parent he couldn't alive but in death they were cared for. Keep going but please stay away from cuck stories like many wannabe writers seem to think readers love reading....we don't.

2nd time I've read that one. It still tears me apart.

Would be nice to see an alt ending. He was just too good of a Dad and a man. So sad

Great story but if i was so crushed i would consider ending my life i think i would cripple bennett and the cheating wife and take my chances in court that i get a short jail sentence. The do it again!.

How is killing yourself taking revenge "with impunity"?

One of the best tales on this sight.Very good story telling and well written,but suicide??as revenge?? l am surprised you tried to pedal that on the readers with so many options for him to get justification and a happy life including his kids.But it did open it up for your surprising ending. Realistic Fiction at its

best.....5 stars...I must read your other submissions......JZK

Ultimately Rick was not a "nice" person. His retribution on Cindy was extraordinarily excessive and made him seem to be a very selfish victim

Winfield Scott was an American general in the Mexican-American War. Famous shipwreck off the coast

of Santa Barbara in 1583?

Do not believe suicide solves anything but ending the life of someone who does not have guts to resolve his/her problem

Excellent.

Not the path I would have chosen, but understandable and relatable in the way we, as human beings, feel and love so deeply sometimes.

And his revenge...12 years into the future...utter destruction of the lives of the 2 people who caused his own life to end.

He needed his whore of a wife only long enough to finish raising his children.

But after that? He had no use for her. So he set it up to make her a pariah. A complete outcast to not just the community, but to her family and her children. She would have to sell and move somewhere else entirely to live her life. Alone. Without contact from her children who now know that their mother's actions obliterated their father.

And the man who seduced her...lost everything.

A good story. There are those who abhore the suicide route for sure.

But as a fictional plot device...it's effective, tragic and been around since at least Shakespeare. Hardly uncommon. This piece is well written. Emotional. And has evoked more than 340 comments since being posted and seems to be going strong at evoking reactions. Well done.

I hated the whole suicide aspect and how it became the cornerstone of his revenge. The whole narrative that a child is better off with a dead parent rather than a divorced set of parents is BS and absurd, unless the parent is violent and abusive.

Very dark. I kind of suspected what the 3rd solution was, but it still was shocking to read. The 12 year follow up was hinted at, but again the realization achieved it's purpose. I'm left grieving for the loss of a happy family and it's would-be happy future. *****

Ugh!

guys don't kill yourself over a pig! come on it is not worth it!!!!

Really brings into the light that no one really gives a shit about men's mental health. Men across the US at least unalive themselves because of cheating wives. What I will also point out that I think will probably happen is her family and kids driving her to unalive herself. Which I don't condone at all no matter what.

This story may have set a record for 1st year comments.

There are two any for me to take the time to read them all.

Suicide is the sad result of absolute hopelessness.

It is selfish act. If he had really loved his wife as the story claims he would have forgiven her.

If he loved his children as he claimed, he would not have destroyed their adult lives.

At heart he was a mean selfish vindictive man, and he knew it and had to destroy himself because he let his monster out.

As for disappointments: Lori seemed to be special, but in e end se took part in the double BTB without a thought for the children. Really a horrible story about horrible people.

The author is brilliant! The story is very well plotted and told. This is a 5/5 but at least 99.9 per centile!

In my little world, the proper reaction would be to feed Mr. Bennett to the fishes off the California coast, leaving Cindy to ponder his mysterious disappearance.

Of course, that's just the opinion of a marriage game loser ......

Great story this one it really pulled on my heartstrings as do nearly all your tales, you really seem to capture the devastation resulting from betrayal in a seemingly blissful marriage.I would have preferred the husband to move on with his life instead of denying his children a loving father, but i guess that was the whole point of the story hence the title.I have to say TT59 i really enjoy your stories.

What a loser. Kids who would read such a letter would end up hating both parents. One for ruining their family the other for ruining their lives. Horrible, horrible parents, both of them.

Could concept but too far. It was too much for the husband to extract his revenge on his wife by damaging children. Even adults can be wounded.

anon.1

I feel sorry for the husband and children, there's so much trauma for him and them throughout and ongoing, the wife and her lover deserve all the suffering and much, much more.

I enjoyed the Poe quote, though my favorite Poe remains "Anna-Belle Lee"

Sad but very well written and original 5

Wow. Totally evil. I loved it!

5 stars

yup, that's a woman alright.

Boy, Rick surely showed her. The stupid weak wimp also showed how much he loved and wanted to be with his kids. The fucking asshole deserves to be in hell more than his slut wife. The crybaby really came up with a great solution. DUH! Well written but stupid. 1/5

I like this author a lot because he understands how married women who cheat usually never have to pay the piper. Killing himself does go against my limit.. still gave it a 5.

Suicide is punishing with impunity...? Methinks not.

Killer ending............

Great story that balances itself on one bit of bullish it. There's no way that the kids believing you are dead is better than divorced is better for them. Despite that huge mistake its a good story

-1 for weak suicide shit. Grow some balls and fuck the traitors up.

Firmly against suicide for it is the ultimate selfishness, trying to save one's self from pain while dishing it out to others.

That aside. the quality of plot (not the content) and the careful development of the characters + just good writing means 5+

A bit of a tear jerker. But the suicide was a real downer. For a father to do that to his children that he claims to love so much, it would be the most cruel thing he could have done.

This is the most gut wrenching painful story I have read so far on this site. What a talent to be able to produce such a searing first story.

excellent one

but I have few comments

1- her lover was not punished for over 12 years, and of course he did the same thing with other married women

2- the husband took the easy way to escape, he took his life, so what if she enjoyed her life after he died? he even left to her 300,000 USD to cover for one or tow months, so it seams that he was rewarding her for her cheating, he is the only one who was in pain, and his children suffered too, while the cheater got money and freedom to fuck her lover or any other man she wants, so the author punish the victim and left the cheater in a very good condition

(I know that the author tried to show her sad ad remoras, but the husband thought that she only wants her lover and not him, so why he gave her every thing?

3- how come that a letter will destroy a good business? her lover is in another big city, in which no body knows her or her husband, so why any body will care about sex relation between a cheating wife and her boss?

but it was a good touchy story , I give it 5 stars

to the author I want to say good job, and try to be more logical in the future

While I gave this 4 stars - it was extremely well written & held my interest, the length was a bit longer than I like. Oh woe is me! Lol. But I've problems with the length of time between the betrayal & her "paying the piper"; much too long. I also have problems with the fact that he killed himself instead of divorcing; I'm no lawyer. but I question that children are worse in divorce than when a parent dies. Then, again, at least to me, they are not totally balanced, so any thoughts where the children would be better is a wrong assumption.

---> However, for a man who loves his children so much, killing himself in that car crash just does not compute. At all. He's making them live without a father, & taking chances on WTF his wife would do & be with. Does he thing them getting a letter, describing everything 12 yrs or so down the line wouldn't cause an emotional upheaval? As such, in much different ways, he's as bad as his wife.

----> Also, while the letters sent to family, etc., will do harm to his wife, I doubt it would cause any business to cave in. Then there's the money. He set the kids with a huge amount, but then gave his wife enough to last for her lifetime. What? This's the woman he wanted nothing to do with?

----> As such, the wife caused an implosion in their marriage by betraying her husband for those months, & thinking she could get away with it. One selfish bitch. And she loves him? If it wasn't for his promotion & wanting to surprise her.... Then, the husband- by his crying about not divorcing her to his suicide & setting his wife up for (at least) almost life, he portrayed as weak- while in pain, his 3rd option's to spread the pain around to others, having some wait over a decade to learn why. This's an extremely said/ painful story, but despite the above, well told. Again, 4 stars Bob

Wow!

Ed

Whilst taking the cowards way out, ie. Suicide. There was no guarantee that he would actually kill himself in a car crash. Unless he disabled the air bags he would have had their protection even in a head on collision. He could have maimed himself for life ending up as a paraplegic or quadriplegic and completely failed in his quest to defraud the insurance company.

Oh you dirty rotten bastard. I failed in this endeavour of doing what Rick did, once already. I won't fail a second time.

Well, this made grim reading which really cheered me up. So hubby decides to solve his marital problems by committing suicide and perpetuating insurance fraud. What a good example for his children. 2 stars but thanks for sharing.

Oh dear, this yarn makes for grim reading. Don’t read it if you need cheering up. Hubby decides to solve his marital problems by committing suicide and perpetrating insurance fraud. What a great example that is to his children. It makes wifey’s cheating look trivial. I can think of lots of ways to sort out a cheating spouse but suicide isn’t one of them. 2 stars but thanks for sharing.

I was hoping that he was alive somewhere, with Lori. Woulda served the slut right.

ps- I gave it 4 stars, because although I thought he would have wanted revenge, taking his own life was too extreme. And I am sure, the Narcissist bitch, would have been the town bike moving forward.

Why the heck commit suicide? Thr insurance fraud is weak sauce motive. Blecch.

Fantastic! I really love your stories please keep writing them.

Great story, well written.

Awesome story I couldn’t stop until the end! Great job!

What a bizarre way to sort it out. Could have BTB without suicide. The ultimate revenge would have rebounded on the kids as young adults too. Just when they would be getting started in life. How messed up is that? Not to mention wrecking what little family life left: their relationship with the mother, trust in future potential partners, etc., etc., ad infinitum. And the insurance fraud via suicide? Just stupid. Kidnap the Bennet guy, make HIM the corpse in a fiery crash, and secretly move someplace with the Lori character. Or something similar. Inventive story but build on too many faulty premises.

Cindy was a cheating slut, but the MC had real mental issues.

Sorry, suicide! What a joke. It ruined an otherwise good story.

AWESOME STORY great job it was enjoyed n appreciated

Cowards way out.

WOW ! Awesome , excellent writing

Terrific story. It actually left doubt that he really died. Great vindication at the end. The piper did his diligence. To all those who gave one star and dissed the writer, screw you. Its a ficticious story and the writer's perogative.

Talán ez volt a második olyan írás melyre öt csillagot adtam itt a Literotca-ban!Gratulálok ! Kérem ,folytassa az írásait!

Well-written , but depressing story. Talk about extreme repercussions from an affair , this was about as bad as it could get. The payback fashioned by the dead husband was a little over the top though. And how did he know how to find Lori and get her to cooperate in his 12 year plan.(He hadn’t even known her.) - Good story but kind of a downer.

There was a similar story like this where the husband committed suicide. In that story the wife committed suicide after the kids graduated college. She was the one that left a note for the kids on why their dad was actually was a suicide and the reason for her early demise.

To all the comments calling this a chicken way out,. Suicide has a strong pull on the human psyche. It appears to some as in this case to be the best solution. Remember he did some “research.” The outcome was passing on was better accepted by kids than divorce.

I wished the wife experienced chronic recurrent major depression episode, self hate, and guilt for the rest of her life

Hate her Hate bennet and am so glad BOTH their lives were ruinend

Femdom agitprop with a bizarre passive aggressive BTB ending.

A mature story, told in a mature way. Excellent writing. Consequences are like a out-of-control forest fire: It destroys everything in the path until it's spent.

I think any tale that elicits a strong reaction deserves 4 stars, I hated the male M/C. What a gutless selfish loser. Leave your kids to be raised by a slut with the morals of a pile of crap. Oh she won't benefit from my death...Blah blah Blah.. Also the guy was a partner in a firm... The 300k was also B.S. She would get all the community property. Bennett the rat should have been dealt with by the husband.. Probably not going to endear me to some readers but this M/C never raised the seat a day in his life. He could have accomplished all and more by staying alive.

Don't like self-punishing husbands. Abandoning his kids is cowardly.

MC is a bitch. But at least he made Bennett feel really really sorry. And destroyed his kids lives for no discernable reason, but, hey, he was right! Right stupid.

He didn’t burn her , he cremated her. Unfortunately, he failed his children abysmally. I can’t imagine the pain and turmoil a person like him would be in but his “solution” was despicable.

The research and the justification for his suicide is pure bullshit. But it allowed the author to write about revenge from the grave.

I thought for a moment he faked his death, and was living in Texas with Lori. However, that didn’t happen. But I think that his final revenge, really wouldn’t have meant much. Let’s look at this logically....

#1. Killing himself. Cindy would have logically felt responsible, and it would have bothered her for a few years. That being said, she was caught cheating, and was very apologetic. I think after all these years, she would have reconciled her actions, and felt he took the cowards way out.

#2. Outing her actions, and the lovers, to everyone 14 years later. I am sure most people would have been interested in the story, but it would have been obvious he had a screw loose, to kill himself and plan something like this. Cheating, and divorces happen everyday. There would have been no retribution on Cindy, or the boyfriend, for something that happened 14 years ago.

#3. Explaining everything to the kids- Once again, WHY spare them the issue of going through a divorce, just to let them know you killed yourself? I am sure, they would have been much better with a divorce, and both parents.

So.... Interesting story line. But the people’s actions didn’t ring true to me. But I still gave it, 4 stars.

All because of he listened to a psychologist study about the impacts on children...

This was just plain STUPID.

How is suicide the only optio for this guy? He obviously had his own inner demons to wrestle with. The idea that a death is easier to accept than a divorce is for grry divorces. Not the children. Children never forgive a parent for committing suicide. I know because suffering from a nasty rare neuromusclar degenerative disease that took 10 years to diagnose and finally get treatment for, on multiple occasions I had already made peace with suicide. As terrible as it may sound I had come to believe that God wanted no one to suffer the pain I was experiencing (think bone cancer and double it) and that I would be forgiven. My (true) loving wife who took care of me and stood by me all that time? Well I (perhaps seems shallow in hindsight) had rationalized that we had a number of good years together and she was an adult. Buy the one thing, that prevented me over and over again from actually doing the deed, despite all the ideation for several years before things turned around, was the undeniable fact that my two youg children would NEVER forgive me and would be broken. That stopped me on multiple occasions. I finally went to a psychiatrist for help, but he said I didn't have a mental disorder, I had a severe pain problem and a nasty rare degenerative disease (1 in 600k chance). Finally things turned around when I got a real diagnosis and treatment plan though my life will always be affected. But that is not my point. When his children find out from his 45th birthday letter, yes they will torch their mother, but they will never forgive the abandonment by their father and will be broken for the rest of their lives. Divorce would have been an infinitely better option. And yes Cindy was a real bitch. Ironically she did not stopped to the usual cliches and tried to own up to what she did. But her betrayal was too severe and she broke her husband and pissed on her marriage. But suicide was not a viable 3rd option. That psychologist who wrote that article is a quack.

waah waah waah

The world is better off with his suicide. Cause we know we'd be hearing him crying for the rest of his days alive. And as fulfilling as that is, it's not.

Can you write a MC/husband character who is an actual man?