All Comments on 'Ruth's Love Story Pt. 01'

General storyline is sound but two many plot lines that are as much a distraction than move the overall arc forward. Her mom is getting double teamed by two men, then runs off with a teenage girl. She never has any dialogue with the man that raised her, two sisters won't talk to her but we don't really know why. Just STOP! It's too much. Keep it simpler and work on sentence flow. At times the story reads well, then you degrade into single thought sentences that make the reader feel like they are getting hit by a literary machine gun. 3,4*