Sad Son Pt. 03

I go slowly up to my room to be by myself. I miss my sisters. It's Christmas Eve, and I don't have a present for my sisters. I can't buy anything. I can't make dinner. I can't fold paper or sew to make ornaments.

I use my palm to turn on my computer. I do use my hand to start Word and the voice recognition software. Until two in the morning, I write song lyrics for each of my sisters. That's something I've never done before. Writing something to convey a message, and have it rhyme and not sound stupid is hard. Each song has three parts and a chorus. That's a ton of work, and the voice recognition software makes it much harder than it should be. I did improve a lot on editing with voice recognition.

*****

Emma's point of view:

Christmas Eve Dinner was great but less boisterous than in past years. This has been a rough and emotional year. These last eight weeks have been horrendous. There were no free days, and we used all our free time caring for Hal and doing all the things he usually does. It's been years since we shoveled snow, took out the garbage, set the cans out front, did the dishes, and did many other minor things.

We're all worn out, tired, and horny from the sexless house. If we had any free time, we slept. We've had no time for boyfriends.

OH FUCK! I look around the table again. I know who's here, but I repeatedly check as tears roll down my eyes.

Donna stops her fork of pumpkin pie and asks me, "Emma, why the sudden tears?"

She can't talk. That's odd. What could bother her so much on Christmas Eve? She looks at dad's spot at the head of the table. Duh, he... Oh shit. How did we forget Hal? Why didn't he come down? With the two of us now looking, there is a collective, "Oh shit." I couldn't have said it better.

Faith inquires, "What do we do?"

We all look unfairly at Andrea. Her face is a train wreck of emotions. She's troubled by this. She sits and spends a few moments thinking.

With a soft and faltering voice, Andrea says, "He knows we're down here. His legs work just fine. That means he's mad at us. I say fuck him. He can stay up there. I'm worn out. I should be working right now, but they forced me to take some time. They know my story."

I am shocked when Becky talks back to Andrea, "I was last up the stairs, and I don't remember him in front of me. That means we all walked into the house and went straight to bed for a nap before dinner. I know we're all worn out taking care of him and doing his chores. Has anyone ever shoveled snow before? That's hard work. We seven took turns."

Casey follows along, "That means he was down here wanting to spend time with us, and we never even glanced at him."

Faith quips, "I've glanced at enough of some places I never want to see again."

We all giggle.

Gail adds, "Andrea's right. If we go up now, I think that's even more pathetic for him. Do any of us really want to watch him eat another meal?"

I am forceful in my resolve, "He eats with us tomorrow, three meals."

My sisters all nod in agreement.

Andrea asks, "I know that nobody bought presents this year, we have no money. What do we do tomorrow?"

Casey chimes in, "I have two gizmo's for Hal."

I'm excited, "You know, I had no idea you were done with all the graduations and starting work for you three. How does it sound?"

Casey's excited, "I worked with Jeremy. He's such a nice guy."

She stops to think of him and then starts again, "He's been fantastic. He offered a few suggestions to help it sell better. He showed me how others are made so that mine will stack up against other brands. It needed to start faster and allow sound, even when it is turned off.

"He plays with the multiple guitar effects, and it's terrible on some of that super-fast stuff. It seems made for emotions and love songs, something Jeremy struggles with. He did show me how to play a few chords, so I could test it myself. With fast finger work, the slight bleeding of sound was incredible. He had a lot of fun with the bleeding sound device.

"His suggestions were awesome with this device. I had like four settings. He suggested a deal with more flexibility. I made it digital, so it's easier to get the same setting every time. The major retailers want 1,000 of each as soon as a major song uses the devices."

I'm shocked, "Wow. That's a lot of money."

Casey says, "Now that I have a feel for this type of device and how sound works, I have more ideas. I might be able to make my own company specializing in sound modifiers."

Andrea inquires, "Won't we need money to do that?"

Casey chuckles, "Of course. However, my boss has hinted that they might want in on this and would be willing to help fund me."

Becky is swift to reply, "Jeremy recommended against that. I think he suspects a gold mine there. He hinted that he's willing to help. Let's face it, though. For them to want the devices, someone, Hal, needs a hit song using them. He should see some good money from that. Plus, we have three money earners now in one house."

Andrea points out, "You two have student loans; we have a mortgage, no trust fund anymore, and some hospital bills left over. We don't even know if Hal can play still."

I butt in, "Hey, he has been terrific about not using his hands. Not once did I see him do anything they didn't want him doing."

Gail adds, "He was a pain in the ass, but he did follow orders to the T. He wants to play again. I guess he starts in the studio. It won't be much money, but it all helps. I'm OK with letting all his money go towards helping Casey."

I add, "I agree. Casey's gizmos could be big for a long time. She is a potential game-changer for our family. I'm not putting Andrea or Becky down, they will earn good money and should be able to support us while the rest of us get through college, and Hal hopefully does something. The odds for Hal are slim. We need to be realistic."

Gail cuts me off, "I think you underestimate him. He will play again. He may not be the best like he may have been, but even his slow stuff has more emotion than others can do. Even Jeremy can't play like that; he's special. If he makes it big, our lives will never be the same."

Faith is the voice of reason tonight, "Since we don't have any presents, let's make a quick grocery run while they're open. Then let's make cookies tonight and tomorrow."

A sad-looking Andrea comments, "We only have $62.00 left in checking. You better go to that cheap place. Becky gets paid in two days, and I get paid in four."

Casey surprises us, "I got some cash. We'll be good."

Andrea is mad, "How did you get cash? You're not...."

Casey turns red from embarrassment and rage, "NEVER! How dare you! Jeremy gave me some cash just in case. I've had it for a few weeks. He knows we're hurting, and he isn't. I know the porn stars have given all of us cash to help out."

Casey is crying now, "How do we ever pay these people back?"

Faith comforts Casey, "They didn't do this expecting to get paid back. However, if Hal ever records his own album, you know Jeremy will be there. If Hal ever tours, you know those retired porn stars will be on stage getting paid to do what they love and show off on stage. We all know Hal can't dance."

Every sister smiles and agrees.

Faith continues, "They had a blast. He will hire at least some of them." She laughs. "Some of them aren't much better than Hal. The difference is nobody cares how they dance as long as they look that hot."

We all giggle.

I jest, "Could you imagine us hosting a pool party for that group? Within minutes they're all naked and splashing in the water. Hal and Jeremy would be the only men."

Donna smirks, "How about we leave the porn stars out and just invite Jeremy?"

I giggle, "I like that idea. Which one of us does he like?"

Andrea shocks us all, "Hal."

We all scream, "WHAT?!"

Andrea continues, "I heard Lauren say to Jeremy, 'It's a shame a man as good looking as you bats for the other team. All of Hal's sisters and I all want you.' He replies to Lauren after a deep kiss, 'Sorry. You like girls; I like guys. Hal has some nice-looking sisters.' That's all I heard. She locked lips with him. That was back at the hospital."

I am bummed out, "Well, that ruins a perfectly good Christmas Eve. Casey, I'll go with you. We better hurry before they close."

We watched "It's a Wonderful Life" and "The Muppet Christmas Carol," followed by making dozens of Christmas cookies. We stay up until midnight baking, and then it's off to bed.

To be continued...