Spider 02

Spider 02

Was it weird that I read bedtime stories to Josh and Kevin last week? Well, duh. But did everyone enjoy them just the same? Well, double duh, they both blew their loads somewhere on me, so duh.

Was it going to be weird when I gave Josh his Peek A Boo bra birthday gift? Well, that was planned for a private moment, so maybe not so embarrassing. But was it going to be weird that the other two nerds would attend the small birthday celebration party? LOL, probably, but I was prepared and hoped that they were too.

LOL, did I show up with my weird dinner of an arm full of Cheeseburger meals? Well, yeah, it's kind of my thing.

Oh, was I really prepared for those man boobs sucking nerd freaks, Mark and Carl? Ah, hell no, but I fed them just the same. Unfortunately, Mark is the most verbal of the two.

"Alright, whoop, whoop, you're officially 22 now Josh, so yay, yada, yada, yada and oh, let's pretend we're sitting around the campfire and tell bedtime stories. You go first, Spider."

"And thank you for the Cheeseburgers???"

"I said yada, yada, yada, so, now you go, Spider."

"Hmmm, once upon a time, the village idiot Marcus spied on the fair maiden fairy and her village Blacksmith and the village idiot forgot what was going to happen as he stroked off in hallway, but the fairy was pleased to spy back and watch the village idiot Marcus have no choice but to lick his own hand clean. The fair maiden fairy posted about that on the fairy forest website. The end."

"Ah, come on, you could at least include how the village idiot said your bare butt looks great."

"Well, it's possible that once upon a time, the village idiot scored a few brownie points. The end."

Yeah, they were disappointed, but I was sticking around for something else. I wanted Josh to try on his new Peek A Boo bra and stir up the guys and I thought I was going to get that when Josh hand waved me into the kitchen.

"Spider, this is getting too weird and I don't think I can do it so much out in the open like this. Don't you think this is a little weird?"

"Weird? This is the pure definition of weird, but I passed up weird when I forgot to wear capri tights or shorts under my skirt, you know, because I was just going across the hall for a birthday party. But I understand the importance of the moment, so we'll put a pin it for tonight, alright?"

Hey, you can't push people into uncomfortable situations, so whatever Josh wants. I mean, it was his birthday and all, right? So, I left the nerds to do whatever they do when the front door is closed.

"Alright guys, I'll leave you to finish up the party now. I hope you enjoyed the Cheeseburger meals and there is a whole stack of science picture books on the center shelf. I may or may not have personally bookmarked a few of my favorite pages. Moons, right? They have some sexy craters. So, Carl, will you be a gentleman and walk me across the hall? Safety first, right?"

Hey, the guy hardly ever speaks and I just wanted to him say "no thank you" so I knew his vocal cords worked.

"Ah, sure, I'll do that for you, Spider. Are you ready to go now?"

Oh snap, that was like 14 words or something. I mean, for Carl, that's almost a date. LOL, and then we made the five steps directly across the hallway of our apartment building. So, he had 7 seconds to make a move on me and he didn't, so I said good night.

"Carl, are you light headed or feeling faint from speaking all those 14 words? You look faint and light headed. Would you like to come in so I can put a damp cloth on your forehead? And that's not a pickup line because I know you need all the titties and we both know that I don't have any of titties. So, does it matter than I have a fairy's wand and no titties, Carl?"

"You don't know some stuff, but I might be light headed from downing all those colas, so OK."

"Are you going to hump me like a madman as soon as I closed the door behind us because you're not really light headed, but you like me in a skirt? Your eyes are telling that once upon a time is in 10 seconds. By the way, I'm not backing off."

"It doesn't make me a bad person, you know, but it does help that you're pushing forward."

Hah, a true statement to say the least, right? Oh, and then it really was a true statement because he flung me against the door, positioned my arms above me and lifted my skirt in the back.

"Can I drop my shorts, Spider?"

"Yes Carl, just push my undies to the side and whisper sweet sexy nothings in my ear."

"I'm not opposed to kissing, Spider."

"Ugh, oh, I look forward it to it sometime. Do we need some lube, Carl? I don't mind if you want to force push it in. I'm here for you."

"Damn it, help me Spider, get me wet, Spider."

"Oh, Carl, gladly."

Oh, it wasn't really me, but his forcefulness and the position against the door was exciting. Naughty if you will. Besides, he only asked me to get his tool wet, right? Hah, take a guy, put that guy's cock in a mouth and yeah, right, just long enough to get it wet, right? More like gag the fair maiden fairy until she submitted. Also, I submitted and he took advantage of that and gave the fair maiden fairy a huge mouthful of wildly warm and gooey stuff.

"Geez, Carl, jack off more or something, that was a lot of stuff to swallow."

"Are you light head and faint now? Are you my secret now?"

"Ugh, yes and yes. Help me to the couch. Also, secret doesn't mean slut."

"Let's get you on the couch, but tell me your story about it. Did you squirt? Are you a mess?"

"Once upon a time, there was a quiet villager street sweeper who barely spoke and stayed in shadows unless he was sexually abusing his buddies man boobs. Then one day he emerged from the shadows and showed the fair maiden fairy how exciting sex could be. And then the quiet villager promised to finished he started someday because the fairy really liked being pushed up against the front door like that. Is the quiet villager listening? Oh, holy mid evil snap, is the quiet villager ready to sweep the streets again so soon? Ah, you heard the part of the story where the fairy likes it against the door, right?"

"Well, Spider, what are the chances that once upon a time, condoms magically appeared?"

"Poof! Top drawer of my dresser, I mean once upon a time, poof with my magic wand and all."

Well, once upon a time, Spider had never kissed a boy or a girl and then once upon an August evening that changed and it was the quiet villager who took the lead. LOL, and then he led me into my bedroom and once upon a timed me against the bedroom door and holy mid evil again, Carl got game! I mean, I had a sore ass, but that was probably going to happen sooner or later anyways.

"So, quiet nerds, right Spider?"

"I'm not complaining, Carl."

"So, are we secretly dating, like going to the Super Con together next weekend?"

Whoa, whoa, whoa! No one ever used the word "date" with me before. That was almost as exciting as being slammed into the door 35 times.

"Ah, how would you like me to dress? Distressed tights? Shorts? Fishnets? Denim skirt? All of the above? Can you get it up again?"

Oh, so that's not a question you ask a guy, huh? Mental note ignored.

It was like once upon a time a fairy opened her mouth and then in no time said fairy was on her belly on the bed and the quiet villager took his time letting that third nut go. All I could think of was hard the mid evil folks had things so difficult by not having lubricated condoms available in a box of 12, you know, once upon a time.

Alright, let's see. Once upon a time, a queer boy was bullied by a few people and then a short time later that fair maiden fairy had the village Blacksmith on the hook, had a fantasy about the village Warrior, who had multiple wounds which required several pairs of fishnet stockings to bandage up, and along comes the quiet village street sweeper and poof, not one single word about the magic wand that the fair maiden fairy had to swing around all the time.

Huh, not too bad, right? Oh, did I bring up that there would be no secrets if we showed up together at the Super Con? Ah, no, he's the one who is concerned abouts secrets. My concern was what to wear to such a popular event.

Ugh, I was hoping you wouldn't ask that, but listen, if he doesn't dump me the day after the Super Con, I will talk to him about his freaky little thing with Josh's man boobs. If he does dump me like everyone on Chang says he will, well, he can suck on the boobs of his choice. But I'll tell you this, I was promised a video clip of that and I'm not doing anything rash until it's safely downloaded in my phone, my laptop, my cloud, my backup hard drive and a couple of memory sticks. You know, just in case I need something in the future to remind some people that once upon a time, my neighbors played hard together.

End Spider 02