Strong Safety Ch. 03

We took turns cooking so Mom wouldn't have to do it every evening. Because we were cooking the meals, we did the grocery shopping as well. Mom tried to convince her to accept reimbursement for the shopping but Lauren politely refused. "You have opened your home to me, please let me do this for you. It makes me feel at home."

We took one day to explore my hometown. I showed her the sights. She laughed when we came to the only stop light. We enjoyed lunch one day at the diner and then walked the track around the football field where I played in high school. The tour only took one afternoon but she seemed to get a kick out of my small-town upbringing.

At night we cuddled, and enjoyed kissing, and light touching but we were committed to resolving our feelings before we moved forward. I made sure to give her the 15 minutes she had asked for on our first night of sleeping in the same bed. Each day and night my affection and devotion for her grew. I knew that we were at the point of no return. We would have to move forward together or go in separate directions as friends.

Finally, on Thursday, after eight days at home, we had another important conversation.

"Liam, are we ready for this?"

"Hmm? You're going to need to be a little more specific." I replied with a smile. "Are we ready to... cook dinner? Yep. Open Christmas presents? Almost. Ready to admit that I am crazy about you and have fallen completely head over heels in love with you? Yeah, I am absolutely ready to say those words. I love you, Lauren Sanders. Forever. Even if you decide to walk away, I love you and am always going to love you."

"That's a grown-up kind of love, Liam. We are still kids! I get so afraid when I think about the future. I'm afraid that we don't know what we're doing and we'll hurt each other the way our parents have. I am afraid to lose you because I can't picture my life without you! I love you so much but I have no idea what that means." Tears were welling in her eyes and her fear was so real that she was trembling.

I pulled her into my arms and let her cry. I didn't know what to say so I said nothing at all. She clung to me like I was her safety raft in the middle of the ocean. I know because I held onto her the same way. Finally, her sobs began to subside and she looked into my eyes. "I love you, William Stanley. Forever."

"Lauren, no one knows what life is going to be from one moment to the next and we probably aren't ready for whatever is coming, but I will be by your side, even if I'm scared to death."

"Do you ever get scared, Liam? I've never seen you flinch or run away from anything. Why are you so sure about everything?"

I started laughing "I get afraid just like everyone else. I don't know but I guess I just learned to face it."

"How?"

"Back when I was playing Pop Warner football, I played linebacker. I was faster than most of the kids so I would just run around the blockers and make the tackle. One day we faced a team that had a running back that was super-fast. Every time I tried to run around his blockers he would just run to where I had just been and leave everyone in the dust. I was getting so frustrated because we just couldn't stop him. I was yelling at my teammates, the officials, everyone. After the game, Grandpaw got all over me. He told me 'You can't yell at everyone else when you aren't doing your job.' I looked at him like he was crazy and he told me I hadn't been doing my job. 'If you come at the ball carrier and he has blockers in front of him, it's your job to make sure those blockers can't get him to the endzone. You're supposed to take them out.' I knew he was right. My coaches had tried to get me to play that way all along but I was fast enough that it didn't matter most of the time. And the true reason I didn't want to do it was because the blockers were usually bigger and stronger than me. It was easier to just avoid them. I was a selfish brat, and I was totally arrogant. If I wanted to be the best, then I would have to face the thing that scared me most on the football field. Ever since that day, my philosophy has been to take things head-on."

"Do you think that will work for us?" Lauren asked. "I've never had to be the one to make a sacrifice. I don't know what I will do when the time comes."

"I believe in you, Lauren. You know the difference between right and wrong and I believe you'll choose to do what's right."

Her smile could have lit up the dark side of the moon. It was gorgeous and I just wanted to remember this moment for the rest of my life.

We celebrated Christmas the following week. Christmas was always special and being an only child and the only grandchild meant that I was incredibly spoiled by everyone. This year the attention was split between Lauren and me. It thrilled my heart! My grandmothers had scoured her social media with my mom to find the things that Lauren had liked or posted about. She received some extravagant beauty products and a bag. She was over the moon that had figured out what she liked and bought such a personal gift. My gift to her was pretty personal to both of us.

"Liam, I don't understand I have a phone already, on my mom's plan. Why did you get me a prepaid cellphone?"

"Look at the contact list. It's very short."

"Is this his number? Did you find my dad?"

"Yeah, sweetheart, I found him and he's expecting your call."

"How? Why? What am I going to say?" She was starting to get emotional.

"The engineering technology college works closely with the information technology college. I found a couple of guys that know how to dig and got them to help me out. As for the why, I want everyone to have a good relationship with their dad. And I would suggest, 'Hi, Dad it's Lauren. It's so good to hear your voice." I smiled trying to lessen her stress. "I'll hold your hand or protect your privacy, whatever you want."

"Have you talked to him already? Does he know who you are?"

"I told him that you're my girlfriend and that you have missed him for a long time and would love to talk to him."

"When is he expecting my call? Like now or do I have some time to think about what I want to say?"

"We didn't set an appointment. I told him that you might call today or tomorrow. He said he didn't have any plans and looked forward to talking with you."

"No plans...Do you think he's alone? After all this time is he still by himself?"

"Sorry darlin', I don't have any answers. You'll have to talk with him."

She turned and addressed my whole family, "Will y'all excuse me? I need to make a phone call." Then she turned back to me, "Come with me please?"

"Always."

I got some encouraging and appreciative looks when I walked out of the room holding Lauren's hand.

"Daddy, it's me, Lauren," she said in a nervous voice. "It's so good to hear your voice again too. I was afraid I would never get to talk to you again. I've missed you so much, Daddy."

I sat and held her hand for the next 45 minutes, hearing only Lauren's side of the conversation. She cried, she beamed, then she cried some more. By the end of the conversation, I got the impression that at least she was, and most likely both of us were, headed to see her estranged father.

"Liam, I'm not sure if it's what you thought would happen or want to happen but I have to go see my Dad."

"I hoped y'all would reconnect. What can I do to help?"

"Would your family hate me if I drag you away during the holidays?"

"No, they would stand up and cheer if it means that you get to reconnect with your Dad. Are you sure that you want me there? I don't want to keep y'all from any serious discussions."

"You're the reason that I'm able to talk to him at all. I'm scared to do this but I'm less scared with you by my side."

"Where are we going and when do we leave?"

"Dad ended up in the Blue Ridge Mountains outside of Chattanooga. We always went there for our family vacations."

"That's not too bad of a drive. When do you want to leave?"

"The day after tomorrow?"

"Sounds good, now let's go finish opening presents!"

We left early and made good time. We managed to make a stop and have lunch with Alicia and her family. I can see where Alicia gets her looks and her attitude. She is like her mom made over.

We hit the southern Tennessee border and were at Mr. Sanders' house shortly thereafter. Mr. Sanders had taken his divorce hard and hadn't seemed to recover. To be honest, I don't think he had a reason to try. He was just hanging on and getting by but he had picked a beautiful spot to do it.

We pulled into Mr. Sanders' driveway in Lauren's truck and got out slowly. The GPS had led us right to his front door and the numbers matched what he had given as his address. We walked toward the front porch hand in hand as he stepped out. I let her go as she went to greet her father.

"Hey Dad, it's good to see you. I've missed you."

"Hi baby, it's good to see you too. I'm sorry it's been so long. Why don't y'all come inside?" He stuck his hand out as I approached. "I'm Harold Sanders, please call me Harry. You must be Liam."

"Yes sir, it's nice to meet you. Thank you for allowing me to accompany Lauren. I love her with my entire heart."

"Those are quite the southern manners you got there, Liam. You must make your mama and daddy proud."

"I do my best."

The outside of his cabin was modest and somewhat shabby but the inside was spectacular. Intricate woodwork was everywhere. There was beautiful custom cabinetry and built-ins. The fireplace had a hand-carved live-edge mantel. Either this man was a craftsman or he was close friends with one.

"Wow, sir, your home is beautiful! The level of craftsmanship and detail is incredible. Did you do this yourself?"

"Yeah, this is my therapy. After my family fell apart I was in bad shape. I just about died one night after binge drinking. When I got out of the hospital I had to make a clean break from it. I decided rather than destroy Darren and Samantha I would create. My projects helped me escape my rage and pain."

"I'm proud of you, Daddy," Lauren said. "I don't know why I didn't see you but I'm proud that you have made it through all of this, this, this shit that mom dumped on you. You are a much better man than Darren."

"Thank you, baby, it means the world to hear you say that. I'm so sorry I disappeared on you. Your mother made it clear that if I tried to remain in your life then she would destroy me both financially and in your mind. She told me that an industrial maintenance worker had no place in your life and I would just be an embarrassment to you in your new circle of friends. I was already feeling embarrassed, and I'm ashamed to say that I believed her. I didn't try hard enough. I hope you'll be able to forgive me."

"It's my fault too, Daddy. She told me all kinds of lies about you and I didn't try to find you or force her to let me see you. We both failed but it's all her fault. I don't know how I can ever look her in the eye again." She broke down.

I remained silent as they reconnected but now I needed to say something, "You won't do it alone, love. You have a whole new family that will stand beside you. Your father, my mama, Grandpaw and Grandmaw, Poppee and Gigi all have your back. And I will stand beside you or in front of you whatever you need. You're loved and protected."

I was afraid it would hurt Harry's feelings when she climbed into my lap and cry but he just nodded at me and showed his approval. It was a bittersweet night.

There was only one bedroom in Harry's cabin. He offered Lauren his bed and told her I could have the couch and he would take the floor but she stood up for herself. "Daddy, I hope it won't make you uncomfortable but Liam and I brought an air mattress and plan to sleep next to one another like we do most nights we're together."

He gave me a little bit of a hard look but accepted his daughter's statement. "I understand things are different these days but please respect my home and my daughter while you're here."

"Daddy, Liam is very respectful and has been a perfect gentleman. He's the man I love and I hope to be beside him for a long time."

I couldn't help but smile. This was the first time that she had made any commitment to the future.

"Harry, we can go find a place to stay if you'd be more comfortable with it. We don't want to upset you and today has already been a busy day."

"No, but thank you, Liam. You guys can stay here."