Teah Jones's Diarrhea

Teah quickly entered the house and slammed the door behind her wearing a grey hoodie, sweat pants, and a baseball cap, her hair back in a ponytail.

She had her hand to her mouth to cover her sobs and tears were bursting from her eyes. She sat down on the ottoman across from Hance while he watched the football game. She kept her head down.

Hance tried not to grin as he muted the game and put his feet up on the ottoman, forcing her to scoot over a bit until her right butt cheek hung off of it.

Hance's wife was in distress and he was relishing it.

But, why was he inconsiderate?

What had Teah done to deserve such treatment? It was because Hance had gotten an idea, but Teah didn't have the slightest clue...

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Desperate to kick start her modeling career and frustrated with the pace of her husband Hance's efforts to find her a legitimate agent, Teah Jones landed an audition to try out for a part in a music video.

These wanna-be producers had seen her in the mall and told her, "You look like you should be on TV."

Hance knew it was a scam, and didn't want Teah to waste the little bit of money she had saved up.

Teah was a telemarketer for a little while, but she would call up her girlfriends instead of making sales.

Teah worked out for 8 months to get in shape to be a booty shaker in this contest. She got her itty-bitty waistline back, and her great big donkey ass and cottage cheese thighs were toned and lean.

Hance was happy to see that Teah went to the treadmill more often than the bathroom.

That Sunday before the day before the big contest, Teah went to her mom's and had dinner.

Teah bragged to Rhonda, her mother, that she was a finalist in the contest.

Rhonda cooked up a storm to celebrate in hopes that Teah would win and get a big contract.

Teah inhaled enough food for 8 people, packing in heaping platefuls of turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, greens, and who knows what else.

Because she had Mega Colon, she held it until Thursday, the day before the contest. Hance brought home leftovers from his parents' house.

Like clockwork, Teah dove into it and didn't leave a crumb for him. Hance asked her did she eat his food.

Teah didn't answer him. She just read her contest brochure and sipped ice tea from her thermal jug.

That did it.

If Teah was acting like a stuck-up bitch, imagine what she would be like if she won that contest.

Hance was going save her from that scam-of-a-contest and get her back for leaving him to starve and ignoring him.

While Teah went out with friends to shop, Hance visited a breeder down the road.

Hance paid him for a horse laxative and poured the entire bottle into Teah's thermal jug, shook it up, and put it back into the refrigerator to chill.

She came home that night and drank all of it down.

That same night she packed her things and left for the contest early the next morning.

When she came home the following evening, she was wearing second hand clothes, and she was in tears.

Serves you right, Hance thought. Your husband and your home comes before anything else.

She told Hance what happened at the audition...

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Teah wore a tight, black spandex U-Neck hoochy dress and she had her toenails done in black; the dress stopped about 3 inches below her gluteal folds.

She wore black, 4-inch platform sandals with soft suede footbeds and a single leather top strap.

She had her hair all permed and shiny for the producers. She told Hance that she waited in line for hours in a hotel lobby with no air conditioning.

She said that potential booty shaker candidates were leaving left and right.

By the time Teah got to the threshold of the ballroom, she said that her stomach growled and made a resonant bubbling sound.

She didn't pay it any mind at first.

The producers asked her to dance.

Teah removed her platform sandals and gyrated her booty; she lifted her dress, showed off her thong, and even made her butt cheeks applaud.

Producers were impressed and they asked her to come back later.

Teah said that when she had bent over to pick up her shoes, her belly shuddered and she ripped a heinous wet one right in the judges' faces.

One of the producers said, "The bathroom is right around the corner, young lady."

Teah said she played it off like she was fine.

As she left the room, her belly rumbled and knotted up severely.

Another thong-moistening fart escaped her and she stopped walking for a second.

Nearby she saw a unisex restroom.

She said she started to walk past it, because the contestants were right around the corner.

She got halfway down the corridor, and then the bowel-mangling knots increased.

Teah fell against the wall, buckled forward and released her platform shoes; a small quantity of stewing diarrheic juice inflamed her already clinched anus, and an unexpected surge of warmth oozed out, soaking her bare back leg in a thin, fetid line.

Teah said she realized what was going to happen when she smelled turkey and stuffing.

Although the dress was black, the wetness spotted the back, and the smell quickly filled the hallway.

Slowly, with sweat pours stinging throughout her body, Teah slid down the wall and got her shoes.

When she saw the slimy brown, crescent-shaped blot on the floor, silhouetting her heel, she put her butt against the wall and clinched her cheeks tight.

Then, the producers called her name.

Teah said she got halfway to the first ballroom entry; another bowel-mangling knot fastened her shiny black toes on the humidity-dampened floor.

The other contestants heard the lukewarm feces squirt, and beheld the back of Teah's soaked legs as she darted into the restroom.

Teah pulled up her dress, ripped down her thong and arched forward.

Rancid bronze fluid and morsels of half-digested food sprayed furiously from her bottom onto the ivory toilet seat.

Contestants nearby heard her repugnant, rectal explosion and fled into the hallway.

Teah said she didn't have time to clean off the seat; she was too busy trying to keep the next diarrheic eruption under restraint.

That painful, anal-stabbing rush overwhelmed her sensitive sphincter muscles. She bent forward and there was a disgusting bubbly SPPPUUULLLLTTTT that lasted 5 seconds.

Teah held back for an instant then relaxed her sphincter muscles for another bubbly 3 second SPPPUUULLLLTTTT.

Spurting sounds and warm, stormy gushes of watery poop drained relentlessly from her inflamed gorge, blasting stronger and stronger in continuously blaring squirts.

Teah said that she moaned with relief as that vigorous, diarrheic juice flowed out of her.

A burning, bubbly 4 second SPPPUUULLLLTTTT came and Teah semi-stood to spread her cheeks further apart, to keep splatters of fuming excrement around her anus to a minimum.

Teah spread her toes on the icy floor as another bubbly SPPPUUULLLLTTTT sent quivers throughout her body.

Then came horrendous SPPPUUULLLLTTTT and she rocked sharply forward on the porcelain bowl.

Silence.

And then a 7-second watery SPPPUUULLLLTTTT made her bend forward more, giving more gaping advancement to such unimaginable diarrhea.

The fervent diarrhea slowed down to profuse squirts, moderate plops and soon, innocent dribbles.

Teah said that she semi-stood to see if it was safe. As far as she felt, she was finished.

Not only was she horrified when she beheld the soupy contents in the bowl, but when she pushed down the handle, nothing happened.

She jarred it wildly, and a weak suction sounded shrieked from in the tank; when the bowel movement began, there was no back splash.

Then she said she finally saw the sheet of paper that fell off the door when she closed it.

Teah picked it up and it read: OUT OF ORDER.

After that, the hotel managers had given her some old clothes and sent her on her way.

Teah still couldn't figure out what made her explode like that. Hance just wanted his wife back.

He wanted Teah to settle down.

If Teah ever discovered what he had done, it would mean trouble for Hance and for their marriage.