The B.F.G.

He's stirring with the voices and looks around to find his Mum and my Mum and when he finally looks up at me, he tucks his head back down under the blanket just like his Mum did.

"Haha. Little shit." Jacinta laughs. "I've been replaced. Old goods. Past my use by." She sips her coffee.

"I mean it, Bry. I love you. Never stopped. I'm so sorry for how I hurt you."

I shrug as she sits up and snuggles in against me pulling the blanket around her and looks away to end any reply I could come up with. It's almost a half hour later while she's eating the continental Mum ordered up that she finds my face with her eyes again.

"I want a do-over." She whispers.

"Is that a euphemism?" I ask without signing because she's studying my lips and because I don't know if there's even a sign for 'euphemism'.

She sniggers, "Underwater world, wally. It was so perfect until I fucked it up. I took my mother and Tony there the other day and the whole time I thought about that day. Take me again. Promise I won't... No teenage proposals." She's blushing almost the same colour as her hair, so I put an arm around her shoulders and give her a squeeze.

"It's a date." I tell her. "Give me time to go see them and I'll work it out."

Mum is looking at us curiously. She can't read lips, so she only has half the conversation.

"I'll babysit." She offers with motherly finality.

We finish breakfast listening to Jacinta recap some of the sleepover antics.

"Poor child. I had to explain to her that Camille had made all of you flash your boobs at Brian at some point over the years. She takes a pretty photograph though. Lovely skin." Mum says over her second cup of povo dirt water coffee.

"You took that photo?" Jacinta laughs, "Wait till I tell the girls."

They're talking about Sandy and Brad now and as much as I feel for Sandy it's one of those things that talking about won't fix, so I head for a shower. As I wash myself, I try to ignore the memory of a moment through the night when Little Red pulled my hand from her head to hold it over her heart.

Conveniently, her heart is located between those lovely soft breasts of hers. I harden as I wash myself and remember the warmth of her skin and the slow rise and fall of her breasts with her breathing. She's not a little girl anymore.

She's changed physically in a lot of ways. She was always taller than the others, but motherhood has given her curves to go with it now. Her hair is longer than it used to be as well. She used to keep it shoulder length. Red ringlets that curled and bounced or were held in a high ponytail depending on her mood.

I gave her a green ribbon once. It came on a present I got for my twenty-first birthday. She was only sixteen and she wore it every day to school. It perfectly matched the colour of her eyes. Strangely, it's her eyes I am picturing as I spurt all over the glass shower door.

When I am dressed, I return to find Mum sitting alone at the breakfast counter.

"Jacinta said she'll see you later. She's taken Tony home to get him bathed and dressed." It's fairly off handed as she's playing some game on her tablet.

"I promised Cam, I'd take her shopping this morning." I sign.

"She's taking Tony to the beach this morning, said that she'd see you for some swim up drinks this afternoon."

"Okay."

"Oh..." She pushes her tablet away and fixes me sternly. "I have a date this evening."

"Yeah? Good for you Mum."

"Do you remember that nice man... no of course not. It was at Cam's birthday dinner on Friday night. Kevin." She's smiling and when she sees that I notice, she blushes deep red. "Anyway I..."

"I'll pack an overnight bag, Mum." I put her out of her misery.

Her blush deepens and she laughs nervously, "Probably just getting ahead of myself anyway."

Picking her up in a hug, I kiss her on the head and she laughs like a kid. "Put me down, silly boy."

"I'll take Cam's couch or something."

"Uh uh. I don't think you'll be given the option." She grins and I roll my eyes.

"This is a setup."

She nods and pecks me on the cheek.

Cam and I spend the morning wandering through the myriad of little specialty stores and boutiques that cater to the upper end tourists. One of the problems with being a diesel fitter in the mines is that I earn really good money. Well, no that's not the problem. The problem is I have very little to spend it on.

I bought a nice v8 Landcruiser. I have a mortgage on a house and a rental property in Emerald. My only other real vice is my boat and fishing. Being single, there's not much else to spend it on. So when Cam protests again at the price tags on the little gifts, I just tell her, "I can't take it with me."

She's helped me find each of the girls a few small gifts and a couple of nice things for Mum. She spent a little in a surf shop on a bikini that I wasn't enthusiastic for her to wear in public and a similar one for Jacinta that I did feel a little more interested in seeing worn. And now we stand in front of a small jewellery display.

The assistant hands her one trinket after another and I've told Cam to tell the assistant not to tell her the prices. She finally selects a tri-colour bracelet that makes her eyes widen as she holds it. I nod and the assistant charges it to my card.

"I love, love, love, love, love it Brian." She hugs my waist. "Wait till I show Mum."

As we walk to her favourite African restaurant, I learn that it's rose, white and yellow gold and she's going to have 'happy 21st, love Brian' engraved on it by the time she picks it up tomorrow.

She orders for us. I don't know what half the dishes are. I watch as she taps at her phone while she waits. I don't see her nearly enough. She's grown up like the others. There's a womanly confidence about her now. She's always been a lean little girl, but she's grown into herself over the last couple of years. There's a naughty smile on her face as she studies her phone.

"Do you love her?" I sign when she eventually looks up.

"Tammy?" She turns crimson.

"No, the waitress, dummy." Even mutes do sarcasm.

"I um, really, really, like her." She says quietly, "A lot."

"She's in love with you."

"No way. We're just kinda... you know." She's embarrassed for some reason. I guess talking about your sexuality with your brother is kinda weird. "What makes you say that anyway."

There's a little flattered smirk to her lips.

"The way she looks at you when you're not looking. There's a deep admiration and sadness in her eyes. Like she's afraid you don't feel the same."

"Jesus Brian. What are you, Dr Phil?" Our food arrives and when the waitress leaves, she says, "Tammy's had a really hard life. I care about her a lot. I'm not sure where it's going though."

"Well I'm happy for you. If there's even a small chance that it could be something good, you grab it with both hands, Siss."

"You could try taking your own fucking advice, dumb arse." She rolls her eyes and I laugh.

"She's certainly not a little kid anymore. But you know, I'm just liking that we're talking again."

"Hmm... Part of me wants to bash the silly bitch for what she did to you. Another part wants to bash you for not explaining why you pushed her away. And those fucking rules Brian! They were there just to stop you messing with me hooking up. You're a fucking dickhead sometimes. A stubborn, noble, dickhead. Shut up for a bit. This food is too good to argue over."

I nod and busy myself with the spicy food.

"You were crying in the video." She tells me a little while later. "I'm sorry Brian. I can't believe she did that to you."

"She did nothing to me. I was sad for what she was doing to herself to try and hurt me." We eat in silence until we finish. Cam orders coffees. I guess she's not finished lecturing me.

"Little Red's Rule." I smile at Cam's confusion.

"There were only two rules, Brian. One, keep them safe and Two, respect their choices. What the fuck is Red's Rule?"

"Who did you always send to ask for something? Any time you wanted ice-cream from the shops, a lift to the mall, someone to interfere with the parents; who did you send?"

"Dah... Sin."

"Why?"

"Because you couldn't say no to her."

"Little Red's Rule. The first rule I ever had. The answer is always 'yes'. Sometimes there are conditions, but the answer is always 'yes'. The rest of you all came from good families. Hers was really tough. I promised myself when she was really little that anything she asked, if I could do it, I would."

She sips at her coffee and eyes me strangely. "So, when she... God she was eighteen, I can't believe she asked you to marry her." Her laughter is sad, and she shakes her head.

"Yeah, I was standing there trying to think of how to say 'yes' and find the right conditions when she tried to kiss me, and I held her away so I could think. Do I tell her, 'yes' in a few years when you've gorwn up a bit? But that would be like calling her immature. Do I say, 'yes' but... And then it didn't matter because she was already feeling rejected and you know how she gets."

"Lit, like a whole box of matches." Cam nods.

Our coffees are done, so I pay the bill and as we walk back down the esplanade toward our units Cam leans against me with an arm around me. I love her but I wish she wouldn't. These bloody bags of shopping are awkward.

I leave Cam in the pool area where she takes the bags and hands out gifts to her friends like she's a little sandy haired Santa Clause. They're all sitting in a circle, having commandeered and arranged a bevy of sun lounges.

"Going to get changed." I sign toward them generally and leave for my unit. I hate the attention when I give them things.

In the unit I lay on the bed and watch the ceiling for a while. I'm not an overly emotional sort of person, but this trip has stirred deep wells and my eyes leak a little. Two more days and I head back to my lonely home up north and my busy job in the mines. Back to my little nook in the world. Back to reality.

I've been offered a job in town with a business that sub-contracts to the mines. I really should take it and maybe settle down a bit. It would be gentleman's hours; nine to five, but the pay would be a lot less. I'd drop under the hundred thousand a year line that I worked hard to cross. Still, I'd have the kind of work hours that would make a life possible.

Regular hours, home every night, probably even visit home a bit more often. I'd lead a three-man crew and pretty much be my own boss. Mal, the owner is a mate from the rifle club. He's been trying to get me on board for the last eighteen months. I've just not had a reason and I am well aware of why I'm thinking about it now.

There's a glimmer of hope that I'm trying hard to manage with some dignity.

There's a matching insistent knock at the literal door. And then there is a tangle of arms and legs launched at me, knocking me back on the couch. She straddles me and kisses all over my face. I'm laughing too much to stop her.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you." Kiss, kiss, kiss.

"I've never owned anything this pretty." She runs her fingers along the strand of natural pearls around her neck. "Or this expensive."

"I've missed a couple of Christmases, Jacinta."

"And this?" She holds up the bikini and frowns at me sideways. "You bloody pervert. You want me to wear this? In fucking public? I'm not a little girl anymore, Briany."

"No, you're definitely not. So, maybe it's okay for me to be a bit pervy these days, don't you think?"

In answer she groans and shifts on me, making me aware that she's straddled right over my slowly swelling dick. I can feel the heat of her through the material of her denim shorts as she leans forward in answer and kisses me right on the lips.

It's her old wet lipped trademark BFG kiss. She was the only one of them allowed to kiss me on the lips and only because I couldn't say no to her. She'd lick her lips and smack, right on the mouth. Every damn time.

Except this time, the tip of a warm wriggly tongue teases, testing my lips and she groans as mine open to accept her. Then as soon as it's started, it's over. Realising my eyes had closed, I open them to look and find her red faced and her chest heaving, eyes locked on mine like a predator.

"Yes. You can. In fact, I'm going to fucking go change right now and you can get started perving right away."

As she sits back, the little jolt that goes through her, tells me she felt the evidence of the affect that kiss had on me. Then she's skipping off to the bathroom like a twelve-year-old with a new party dress.

"How did you even get the sizes right?" She asks from the bathroom. I turn to answer and discover she hasn't closed the door behind her and stands there in the most expensive small pieces of fabric I've ever purchased.

My hands are frozen. My lips can't move. My mouth is open in a wordless 'o' as my eyes wander over her body. The last time I'd seen her in a bikini was five years ago and she was a tall thin girl then. I swallow and nervously sign, "Cam helped. She said 36C or 34D depending on cut and size 12 bottoms. Those ones are a size 8 because they're US sized."

She twirls for me and I feel like I have front row seats at a strip show.

"It certainly puts the 'wicked' in Wicked Weasel." She giggles and I nod in agreement. "I'm just glad you didn't get me a fucking thong like the one Cam bought. Your Mum is gonna shit when she sees her in that."

The suit was called, "Cherry Bomb" which was why I was drawn to it. It's black with little red cherries printed over the tiny triangles that struggle to contain Jacinta's generous breasts. The bikini bottoms are very low cut in front and tie at the sides in a loose bow. As she twirls, I see the suit disappears between her lovely round cheeks and a tiny triangle of fabric appears at the top.

"Well, you Big Fucking Glarer? A girl puts on a fucking show for you and you stand there with your bloody jaw unhinged. That's not very gentlemanly. What do you think?" Her smile tells me she already knows what I think.

"It was called, 'cherry bomb', just like the firecracker and I think..." It's not a proper sign but I mimic pulling the pin on a grenade, swallowing it and my mind exploding.

"Haha. Good. Eww... I'm gonna have to borrow a razor, Brian." She points at the 'v' of her bottoms and a little trail of ginger hairs leads up in a straight line.

"Fuck." I mutter wordlessly and tent my pants ridiculously. She smiles and glances down at the front of my shorts.

"Mission accomplished." She giggles, then she ducks back in the bathroom, closes the door and I hear water running. "Hey jerk! Find me a t-shirt to wear over this and go get changed. If I'm wearing this, you're coming swimming with me arsehole."

Smiling to myself, I take my dumb boner and make sure to pull some tight undies on under the boardshorts I select. Returning with a t-shirt for her, (a new one I'd bought that morning,) I find her putting her hair up in the kitchen. Her bright green eyes find mine and as she tussles with her hair holding her hands up above her head, I'm grateful for the tight undies.

"Find me somewhere safe for those." She nods at the pearls on the counter. I hand her the t-shirt and take the pearls to my room and put them in my bag. "Hey, you're gonna need your toothbrush, a change of clothes, something to sleep in... Maybe... um... Pack a bag. You're being held hostage in my room tonight. Judy's got a hot date."

"Ok." So do I.

"Tim and Liz are taking Sandy to some kind of sex toy party in Kawana and Georgie, Cam and Tammy are going clubbing. Friday night so, they're hoping for a fun night. Thought maybe we could grab fish and chips. Is that park still there?" She yells from the kitchenette.

"Yup. But that fish and chip shop you liked is gone. We'll pick some up on the Esplanade and walk down." I sign to her as I return with my bag.

"All set then. Come on my kidnap victim. We have a date with the swim up bar." Her hair is in a lazy plait and she holds it as she smiles at me.

"My shirts always looked better on you." I tell her.

"If you're good, I'll take it off again." She winks. "Better get back downstairs. Tony is probably driving Judy nuts."

As we walk to the lifts, I touch her shoulder and she watches my lips. "Do you remember the lolly place in Montville?"

"Yeah. The one you showed me. They make the candy in front of you." She nods. She had a ball that day.

"Would it be okay if we take Tony up there tomorrow morning? I bet he'd love it too."

"Hell yeah. Fuck Tony, I want to go." She grabs my shirt and pulls my lips down to hers and again there is the smallest hint of tongue.

"So, that's a yes. Good." I smile. I have to pick some things up that I ordered. The lift arrives and we move to the back to face the doors. If there's just one thing I miss about Little Red, it's how she used to have to...

She takes my hand and intertwines her fingers with mine, exactly how she used to. She swings my hand back and forth and beams at me. "I missed you."

"I tried to- You wouldn't reply."

"I know. I used to love our 'chats' but I just couldn't bear it anymore. Just seeing your chat head pop up used to... But here we are now."

"Here we are."

"Cam told me. You know, about your talk. I figure if you can forgive me... If the only reason you were crying was because of how I was hurting myself. Then maybe, I could just try to forgive myself too."

"That was five years ago. Let's leave it there hey?" This time it's me drawing her chin up with my fingers and planting a little naughtier kiss than we ever shared. "Besides, I like having my kisses back."

She blushes and the door dings, welcoming the foyer. "Hey." I mouth and tap her turning shoulder. "I've organised our 'do-over'. Can you make sure the others all keep tomorrow night free too? I've got the whole place booked just for us all. The manager-"

This time, there's enough tongue to communicate a whole new level to our 'thing'. A few tourists find the display amusing. When Jacinta pulls away this time, I'm left with little doubt about that we are on completely new ground as far as little girl crushes and full-grown womanly wants are concerned.

"All of us? The whole place? That must have cost-"

"Not as much as you'd think and besides, you're worth it. Thought we'd have a pyjama party and make the most of the place."

"Pyjamas? That sounds..." She dances on the spot. "Wait till I tell them." She wrinkles her lips to the side and looks at me shyly. "God, I love you Bry. Come on, before I get all sappy."

I'm a bit done with the schmaltz too and follow her strategically out to join the rest of the girls. The t-shirt doesn't quite cover the bottom of her lovely bum cheeks and it's hypnotising. She leaves me with Liz and Sandy while she talks excitedly with Mum and Cam.

Liz shows me the earrings I bought her. Dark pearls hanging below a simple gold stud. They suit her and she thanks me with a peck on the cheek. Sandy, likewise, thanks me with a peck on the cheek and a, "You didn't have to, you Big Fruity Giraffe. But I love them." Hers are one's that Cam chose and I'm just glad they like them. Georgia got a very plain looking handbag that I couldn't believe cost so much and Mum, some perfume and scarfs.

Tim seems a little distracted and I am a little embarrassed, so I strip off my shirt and head to the pool stairs. A few laps later I float and watch this family of people that I love all absorbed in conversation and laughter. One face looks up to find mine and signs, "I love you. You're a good man."

"I love you too, Mum." I reply and breaststroke over to the bar.

I hold up two fingers for the barman and indicate the mid-strength beer tap.

"Room?" He asks and turns away to get glasses. I reach for a pen and write on a coaster, "411. No voice sorry."