All Comments on 'The Cost: IOU'

Stylistically it's something completely different. From a conversation on the porch that takes as much time to read as be spoken, we go to multiple time/place snippets. Loving Wives stories are subject to cliche overload, Q avoided this - or put his own spin on it - by talking about the LW cliches, so that they occur in his voice. Yours was the more standard, this happen, that happened, this reaction and that. It just bogs the whole thing down. It was a reasonable summation.

It may not have a RAAC; but everything else was by the numbers. Cuckolded husband hooks up with hotter woman and lives happily ever after while the cheaters suffer disgrace, impoverishment and a butt load of karma.

I hate that because it doesnt do anyone justice. Thanks for wasting my time.

Great story by a great author and some anonymous prick who hasn't bathed in 100 days comes along and leaves his foul stench in the room. I gave this great story a five. All of us aren't assholes,

Great sequel to one of my favorite tales. Here the good people win. The cheaters and the liars lose. The best way to end an LW tale.

Five Stars

You know what is worse than being a "heartless, cheating bitch"? It is being what Leslie really was: selfish to the point of exceeding her meager intelligence: an arrogant fool. That is not an anomaly, or something that you can change, it is a personality type. She is stuck with it for the rest of her life. Thankfully, Kenny and others did not have be stuck with her.

It wasn't a necessary epilogue but it did add entertainment value to the story. I remember thinking when I read the original that I would love to know the rest of the story. I am very pleased to have this one to fulfill that wish.

the coin of the realm has to be paid by others, TK U MLJ LV NV

An enjoyable story from one of my favorite authors. The 1-star commenter seemed to think it was all lollipops and rainbows, but most of the story was about the aftermath of discovery, the shared suffering of the whole family, and the confusion and lack of self esteem felt by the betrayed. Double betrayal like that is especially difficult. I especially liked his take-down of Les in the cafe-good speech.

This was a very nice continuation of the original story and the characters within. Well done.

Felt it was about 4.5, rounded up to 5.

I was hoping for Ken and Jill, though!

Liked how you had it turn out for everyone. Thought it was a very worthy tribute and a good finish to a classic LW story

I enjoyed the piece and am glad you and the others got back to writing on this good for us day. Thanks for sharing and thanks to Randi for her instigation. Solid 5 all the way.

Excellent tribute to one of my favorite stories on literotica.

I never felt the original story needed a continuation. This proved me wrong. Yep, it's a bit sugary in the end but so what? I like a little sweetness every now and then. 5*

I too was pulling for Kenny and Jill for a while.....but Amanda with one in the yard and one in the oven works just fine, too.

Thanks for this lovely coda to a sad, but excellent flash tale from the great Q.

Happy Legends Day!

I didn't feel it was true to the original characters of Leslie and Kenny; Leslie in particular. In reading Qhm1's original story, I feel that Leslie was a much nicer and kinder person than you portrayed in this story.

Which makes writing a dramatic follow-on much more challenging, I know. A more realistic sequel, in my opinion, would be one in which Leslie quietly accepts the divorce, then redeems herself sometime in the future, perhaps by saving the life of Kenny or Kenny and Amanada's child.

on a "special" day. I have always enjoyed your stories and like this one as well. I think you have done justice to qhml1's story(he is one of my favorites too).

Hope to see more from you very soon. Thanks for the hard work

Woodmanone

Sometimes it's better to leave the original as it is, this is one of those cases. This sequel leaves a lot to be desired. The ending was very poorly written, one time it's the middle of the story the next moment it the ending, what happened in between?

The original was a classic because it was understated and a powerhouse of below the skin emotions. You completely destroyed it with an over the top melodrama which is so loud that my ear drums are bursting.... There is nothing wrong with writing sequels. But at least one should get the essence and soul of the original and keep that intact.

Highly disappointed

Some of the criticisms..."Leslie was a nice person," who cheats on hubby "because she can," with her own sister's hubby! That's a double betrayal. How many "nice people " do you know, who do things like that for no good reason, and plan to continue them?

Story jumping around... I didn't notice that until I read the word "epilogue" which pretty much tells you that you're jumping a few years down the road.

Phooey.

Slightly predictable...but only once Amanda's character was brought in.

It still gets a 5 from me.

Keep on writing, Beast...you're one of the best! BigK

Took nothing away from the original story in my view.

5 Stars.

You know what? I'm just thrilled to be able to read stories by my favorite authors. All the anons should try writing a story someday. It might change your perspective on comments. Thank you for the effort. Good solid story with believable dialog.

The original story is one of my favorite shorts on Lit and my impression is you performed very well in fleshing out a strongly tied continuation. It's difficult to pick up the mindset where someone else once tread but you pulled it off seamlessly. I gave it five stars.

MFH

A previous post noted that 'nice people' could not do such terrible things. I disagree. People are rarely pure good or pure evil. While pursuing an evil cause, good might be done. While pursuing a good cause, evil might be done. (the Inquisition, the Crusades, Jihad) People are often irrational and convince themselves that their behavior is OK. They are then dismayed when nobody else agrees with them. Both qhml1 and DFWbeast have done a great job with these two stories; Leslie is a very human, and yet quite despicable villainess. Thanks.

You did the original justice, not am easy thing to do.And in the mood I am in, I am glad for the romantic ending:)

I rarely read sequels, especially to a great story, because they so frequently fail dismally to meet the standard set by the original and a badly written sequel can ruin the original story for me.

This is an exception to that rule. Your story is well written, enjoyable and follows on from qhml1's without changing anything.

Thank you for sharing this with us.

PaulFelly

Yawn inducing, definitely NOT your best. 1*

Enjoyed the further adventures.

Could have used a bit more angst or drama but still good.

Meh!

Very sentimental. Thanks for the offering.

Yeh, a little "sweet and sloppy" but still a great read. Don't be a stranger :)

Thank you for the story. it is always nice to read your story. Five stars.

Usually, I don't like follow-up stories, but you certainly honored qmh11's original story which I thought was very good story. I don't believe anyone has commented on the fact that qhm11 dedicated his story in honor of Ohio's Scenes from a Marriage.

Boyd Percy

It flowed smoothly from the ending of the qhml1 source. And placed a cap on the unanswered issues.

thanks

A cute quaint romance putting closure on The Cost. That was nice.

No a Leopard cannot change its spots. But Leslie is not a Leopard, she simply behaved like one. And while her behavior is entirely her fault, Kenny was blind not to see her spots before he married her. Leslie was immature and willful and spoiled and selfish and thoughtless of other people, and very stupid. How could Kenny have not seen these flaws while dating her, getting to know her, watching and studying her? So Kenny got what he married. I suspect failure to properly scrutinize and evaluate a potential spouse is the root cause for most marriage failures, especially early marriage failures. But that's another story.

Thanks for your contribution to the celebration. It was a fun read.

You are a legend.

A fine piece of entertainment. An amazing tribute. The ending wasn't too sweet. It fits perfectly with the qhml1 story style of the past 2 or 3 years.

Gave you 4*s DFWBeast.

How about a piece out of Brownwood next time TexasMonsterman ❓lol😄.

Thank you for the story.

AMerryman

As always, your storytelling is top of the line. You have the ability to pull me in and immerse me in the plot and characters. This was my third time reading, but the first time I could just concentrate on the beauty of the weave. I cried the first time I read it. Sam, of course. I cried again this time. You know why. Thank you, and someone has asked for a new Brownwood story. Well? Many hugs, for this story, and... well, you know. Randi.

Nothing at all wrong with a happy ending - he deserved it. I thought the shouting and arguing with Leslie in the cafe was a bit incongruous, a little out-of-character for Ken, but the "battleground" was her choice and she did have him more or less cornered. I also think you stayed true to Q's original story. Well done. So happy to see you're still writing. Thanks again.

Also, kudos to blackrandl1958 for bringing this to fruition. What a fantastic idea!

Congratulations. I honestly felt like I was continuing with qhml1's story telling. Not easy mimicking another author's style, word choice, dialogue, etc. The original still stands on its own because it paints the scene I believe qhml1 wanted to, but you've given it an extended epilogue with closure for most of the characters. Personally, I think the voodoo witch doctor was too much but I felt like the restaurant scene with Leslie was necessary to finally get to see the truth.

Of course there were no surprises or erotic moments but I enjoyed him worrying his pain like a lion. After the scene in Amanda's cafe Leslie gave up.

Good story. Thanks for posting. Four out of five.

It was a very respectable sequel to QHML1s' original.

The only thing that didn't work for me was Kenny screaming. I think the power in the original was Kenny's quiet calm, and yet deeply emotional reaction.

Cheers

Steve

I wish there were more stories like this instead of the constant barrage of cuckolds we seem to get every day. QHMl1 is an excellent writer and has posted many entertaining stories. You did a very good job of extending his story. Thanks for the effort. I hope that you will continue to post.

Really enjoyed your take on this storyline . As always , when I see your name attached , I know that I'll be entertained .

5*s

By people who know how to write!!! Damn that was good reading. Thanks for sharing!!!

Impressive tribute story or I would call it a follow up - now completed story. Q's story is good but I have always wanted more to the tale. I am happy to have gotten it! Very well done I believe you channeled Q's characters and story very well! Thank you for the tribute and putting the story complete!

And as a tribute to another writer who said first and I paraphrase(sorry I don't recall and haven't found again) - please keep writing and I will keep reading!

I thouht you did a great job with the continuence. Looking forward to any future posts....legend

I have read all your stories and this is a continuation of your excellent penmanship! You are a very good writer and you know how to finish a story just like FTDS, may he rest in peace. I can think of quite a few good stories in here that could use your talent. Maybe.....Hmmmmmmmm............

I enjoyed it but I felt sorry for the sister in-law, I further enjoyed the explanation offered in the post epilogue. Most authors are not as forthcoming in their rationale for swinging a story one way or the other. I rated it five stars for guts and talent.

The belief factor did fly out the window quite quickly. Except, truth is always stranger than fiction, there, now it becomes believable. *****

Thanks for sharing your hard work on Lit.

x

I enjoyed this story, the cheaters got burned and the cheated on found happiness, nice to think that could happen in real life⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

First, I commend your follow up of qhml1's story. You are both excellent authors and I can't imagine the difficulty in finishing another authors story without changing it beyond recognition. So thanks.

What I wanted to comment on was your 'housekeeping' of the comments. I agree that criticism of qhml1 would be highly inappropriate. I wish you, and other authors, would extend your broom to personal attacks on your own person. They add nothing to anyone's understanding or enjoyment of the story. I have altered my rating a few times based on cogent comments both + and -. I get nothing from a diatribe.

Anyway,thanks for your time, effort and talent. JPR

Loved the happy ending. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

that stuck to the original feel. Great to read one of your tales

A little warm happy outcome once in a while will not keep me tossing and turning at night. You are quite a master at "tribute" conclusions. Helpful for some one trudging through late in life time who needs to have things spelled out. I enjoyed the original story but of course wondered how it all worked out and you gave me a clear hand.

I love the sweet ending! It was about time that something goes right and wonderful for the injured and cuckolded Kenny!

Yes, all's well. I was half expecting his marriage would be one of those twists where he was with the daughter, not Amanda, or he'd gotten together with the sister. It was odd how the sister was built up as such a great person, then he didn't go there. The "too much baggage" rationale wouldn't have stopped him if she was that great. I imagine his ex wife would have blown a gasket, but that would have been worth it.

A nice serviceable story. Better than most but not nearly as good as your best stuff.

After the big bust up calm eventually came over the family. Kenny appears to come of very well finding true love again.

Enjoyed the story very much gave it five stars both for content and quality of writing.

I never read the first story, so I went back, read it and enjoyed it. I was curious to see the direction you took the story and after reading your ending thought that you did pay tribute to the original author and his story.

Great work.

and I wish I could give you another 5 but I can't. So well done and sometimes endings are sweet. Even in real life. So, please continue to write and share your great talent with us, and if some really don't like what you do, you can just share them with me. So there annonys.

Without getting into the excessive verbiage, it still told a believable story. I don't believe any rational man could have expected any kind of reconciliation. The connection was irretrievably broken. Five stars.

Well-written,true to the original characters as a follow-up story,and an enjoyable read.

Highly recommended,I saw it as a 5+!

Real. Honest. I doubt that the ex would be as bereaved as you suggest -- to be so would suggest genuine sensitivity and an emphatic nature, instead of the cruelty she exhibited by the affair -- after all, even if it is unknown, isn't an affair unkind -- the tree falling in the forest. Good job.

"Jerry had said the same thing as Leslie, that he never thought Jill would leave him." - So, the thought that your spouse won't leave you is a reason to cheat?

"You hypocritical bastard!" - Even if he WAS dating Samantha (obviously not!), it wouldn't make him a hypocrite because they are divorcing, so it wouldn't be cheating.

"He knew he'd been cruel" - As the saying goes, sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.

@Anonymous 03/19/17 Re: "Oh my gosh" - So Kenny didn't recognize her immaturity and selfishness; you ever hear of being blinded by love?

You probably are one of the premier authoes on here. When you post I read. And cry but you are fantastic. Thank you.

Excellent ending to a disturbing tale.

Read it again. Great sequel to the original. Cheaters don't think about the consequences when they commit adultery. This fine tale shows what could happen when you cheat on your spouse.

Don't cheat

I'm not against reconciliation per se, but there are situation that are beyond it. This was one of them. There was no way to repare de the damage that Leslie had done to her relationship. He was right, she'll probably cheat again. I truly enjoyed this sequel.

he got his porch, a beautiful loving wife, kids, and even an extra daughter to spoil. A man can live happily with far less.

I didn't see the aunt coming until it was past obvious. I was sure he would end up with Jill.

The flow from the original story into this could not be any smoother.

With so many incomplete, unfinished, "hanging" stories on literotica I am a devout believer in continuities in the great tradition of the master, FTDS. Having tried repeatedly to attempt some myself (never doing well enough to submit one,) I have developed a great sensitivity and admiration for a "continuity well done." In that context this was very well done. Characters fit, their behavior fit, their integrity fit, and the story remained true.

Well done. Thank you.

... It's nice, you know?

It's nice knowing that good guys can get over being emotionally crucified by worthless, cheating cunts, for NO EFFING REASON, and can move on enough to allow themselves the chance to meet the women they truly meant to be with.

It's nice to see good girls forgetting the cockroach-like, pathetic fuckstains dumb enough to not be loyal to them, so they can find the men that are meant to become the fathers of their unborn children.

It's nice to bear witness to narcissistic, untrustworthy scums-of-the-Earth, aka cheaters, getting run out of whichever town they've wrecked people's lives in, the shame of their sordid behaviors, a scarlet letter they couldn't really live with among more honest individuals who knew what sort of people they were (with some help from a bogus voodoo priest, if necessary!)

Sure, qhml1 has already pretty much said all that needed to be said about this story. But... it's always nice to read about the good guys eventually winning, and the bad guys ultimately losing. It's basic human nature, I guess.

Good job, Beastie. Thanks for the read.

Great to read your story - complimented the original very well.

No - your sweet ending did not give me diabetes HAHAHAHAHA

Keep on going DFWBeast.

It was sweet to the point of not adding any sugar to my tea and coffee for a whole day.. Haha.. Very good story and I love happy sweet endings

A legal system that doesn't punish a betrayer of trust... a cheater (especially the female) is a corrupted system that condones the practice of cheating.

"JUSTICE FOR ALL" my ass. With No Fault Divorce as the only option, there's no penalty for committing the crime of adultery against your partner. So where's the justice?? Too many women know they can use a Marriage license to become lottery winner.

For some poor slob who's busted his ass to support the bitch, only to have his heart crushed when he discovers that she's giving someone else squatter's rights to her pussy, even the few dollars he's earned and saved, he's forced by the corrupt 'justice' system to give her. It's an insult to justice.

After the Westerns Bonanza, we need a round of Biblical Parables with ritual stonings of adulterous wives to satisfy the Moral Brigade's need for revenge and retribution.

Lue

I have one story left of yours to read. Then I think I'll move on to qhml1. That is until you write some more.

Very nice. I thought “Q”’s story was a very strong piece on its own, but this addition was a pretty good way to give it some finality.

doesn't waste any occasion to show off her whoryness.

ENJOYABLE BUT I FOUND ALTHOUGH IT WAS SUPPOSEDLY AN EXTENSION OF THE ORIGINAL DIDNT REALLY WORK FOR ME, SORRY BUT ONLY 4****.

I love the way you brought the original story to an amazing conclusion. Great to have a happy ending after the cheaters suffer greatly.

I liked the original. It was stone cold, and burned brightly until consumed. It's fun to read what someone thinks might happen afterwards. This wasn't as good in comparison but was entertaining.

I sort of expected something to follow Kenny and Jill that had something to do with them, since they spent so much damn time comforting each other. Then it was like "naw, we gonna do a u-turn" and surprise, it's Kenny and Sam-anda. I wonder how Jill felt. First she was cast aside as a wimpess by her husband, then Kenny was waved under her nose, and as she inhaled, she was voted off the show by the author. Brutal!

Avoided the cliche of taking up with the sister, and yes, the reason for the treason is immaterial

Some good lines of dialogue in this one:

"What kind of love is it that looks forward to having some piece of shit lover spew his cum all over our child?"

Lol ouch, brutal!

great story and well written perferct ending too

Style is different, but thats ok. Very nice.

... my comment, which I thought was complimentary, was deleted.

His wife was a cold hearted bitch. Do people like this really exist? Unfortunately, yes. Great follow up story. Well done author.*****

of a woman so important, or the man's, or marriage, or family? People get bored and ageing does all sorts of tricks on the mind; this materialistic life, white picket fence, children, family, name and reputation, beer, bar, friends, shooting pool, gang of brothers, girls, gossip, and all of these mundane, suburban, peaceful family crap is not really going to save any of us; unless you become some kind of samaritan and try to spiritual and choose a course that isn't about love, weekend sex, looking good, me, me me, me first me last, my feelings, my cars, my shoes, my friends, my prestige, my club, my retirement, my vacation, my....all these 'my(s)' spell just DOOM, nothing else. Those fortunate die knowing so, and others they die a fool, not even knowing why they sacrificed so much; they perpetrate the same cycle in children's life, too. LW is literally for losers and for those who want to know how to love getting fucked (metaphorically) worshiping false stuff and the institution that this materialistic insensitive society use to keep them slaves forever to its machinations. This is why and this is how Christianity and the Church fails the West, and keep them stupid forever, notwithstanding the material and scientific progress. Every guy dies a sad man for one reason or the other.

Honest and just. The best point...the bad guys didn't win!!!

My kind of story, many thanks and 5*, I do not like BTB or RAAC. This story is good in that the offenders were lost to the paradise they had, while looking for something more. Alas, they found the "something more" turned out to be less than they had, yet those offended found peace. Justice without hatred. Love it!!! n08rkm1

Only an ignoramus would think that the Inquisition and the Crusades were good causes with evil results. They were horrible "causes" of bigotry and , in the case of the Crusades, the conquering of peoples for economic reasons,, committing murder and theft throughout the middle east. I cannot comment on Jihad but clearly many Jihads commit wanton murder upon innocents at the urging of the initiators.

I liked that in this case, the wounded parties (Kenny & Jill) didn’t have to do anything about revenge. Leslie’s ridiculously selfish behavior, then turning into a stalker, generated at least as much drama and humiliation as anything Kenny or Jill could orchestrate.

Even better is how the lodge handled Jerry. Sure, Burt was involved, but lodge members police themselves; they wouldn’t need much convincing.

Not having to waste any thought about how to get even, is the best revenge.

An excellent job, sir. A fitting continuation of qhml1's classic.

Well done! Have read the original a couple of times. Still a great short story. Your story fits seamlessly. IMHO nothing else was needed about Jerry and Leslie. Yes, it is often interesting to go down the rabbit hole and learn more about the cheaters. Usually I like that. But you have put together such a compelling story that it just wasn't necessary.

GREAT JOB!!!

with many who rate this among the best follow up stories ever. I think the author did a great job of "completing" the story without stomping all over the original with extraneous details.

This is one of the only follow up stories I've read that actually felt like I was reading the original. The characters felt exactly like qhml1's original characters, which is rare. Often authors change characters so much, that it feels like a completely different story. This one flowed straight out of the the original, as if qhlm1 wrote it himself directly after the first one. I hope he read it, and I hope he was proud, as you should be.

Great sequel, well written and tastefully executed.

End it was a feel good story that worked. Everyone was true to their created character which helps immensely.

You statement about criticism was satisfying as well. And you are an author I really feel like being hypercritical to at times.

Good job.