All Comments on 'The Delicate Passion between Lovers'

No cheating, no swapping, and no cucks. A loving wife story about one loving couple. Some folks going to hate this, but I love it.

But you really need to learn to write this in a different person.

This genre is about wives having extramarital fun, whether it's cheating, cuckolding, hot-wifing, swapping, etc.

There is a category for this... it's called romance.

Please don't write about me, and learn the proper usage of lay/lie.

Gained a star for not being cuck.

Loving wives should be in quotes, since the category is defined here as wives having sex outside of their marriage. Seems ironic, but this should be in erotic couples or romance.

What happened in the story. Nothing. No drama, no tension, no conflict, no reason to write, no reason to read. The room was painted and the paint dried, finis.

Oops! Thanks for letting me know -- will be corrected soon! X

Reads like a really Erotic Coupling, or a Romance of some sort, and maybe the First Time for one or both of them.

But its not a Loving Wives story. If it were in one of the proper categories I would have never read it, and would have been just fine in my ignorance. Really boring and awkward, but maybe just the bomb in the proper category. We'll never know. Here its just a bomb.

Especially for erotic stories. Automatically you are not talking to 50% of the population who can't relate when you say "your cock jumps a little" because they don't have one. And the other 50% have difficulty relating as SBrooks said "don't write about me".

Second person can work if it is a form of letter to a lover, but then it will be in the past tense (I enjoyed what you did) or future tense (I am looking forward to what you will do), but it can't be present tense in that situation.

And, as others have said, a couple having enjoyable relations with each other goes in Romance or Erotic Couplings. Loving Wives is the category for wives having "Extra-marital fun". There is no indication here of the marital status of the characters.

Despite that, the writing showed promise and the eroticism was descriptive.

Lue

Who am I, the reader, meant to be? I or you! So confusing, but then only read the first sentence.

Please heed the constructive criticisms, but keep writing!