The Only Exception Ch. 07

Chap 7 Trust, Desire and a Wrench

Hello my beautiful readers,

I know it's been a while and I apologize. I see the comments and please do not worry. I will finish my stories. Hopefully this year will be less hectic and I'll get to finish them all. That's the plan anyways. In the meantime, here is my valentine to you. A nice long chapter. I really hope you all enjoy it <3

Much love, xx

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Adam's Pov:

I didn't sleep all night. I couldn't. Every time I tried, something terrible would come into my head. Whether it be my mother on her deathbed or the rape of my omega, I couldn't stop myself from seeing horrifying images every time I closed my eyes. I felt trapped and helpless to do anything for the people I loved. I couldn't go back to the past and save my boyfriend and I couldn't heal my mother. I was useless. Instead of sleeping, I spent my time watching over Benny, kissing his brow and playing with his hair whenever his expression changed in his sleep.

I thought of how he'd asked, or rather begged, for me to be a part his heat following the story of his suffering. His request was so sweet and needy that I could never have turned him down in the moment. Hearing what my omega had been through at the hands of my kind changed how I saw things, though not in the way I'm sure he expected. Before, Benny had always seemed so out of reach to me. An unfortunate circumstance of unrequited love. Now, however, I couldn't imagine letting another hand touch him, for who else could possibly deserve to? A crazy part of my brain even felt like he belonged to me and that he always had, so of course his heat should be mine!

Then, there was the inexplicable sensation that things were changing. I could sense it in the air. I was changing, my life was changing. I would be losing my only family soon but gaining something else, a partner, or so I hoped. Joy and pain was yet to come, I just knew it, and I didn't know what I'd turn into when everything settled back into place. The undercurrent of rage I so often felt during my childhood reared it's ugly face once more and I thought back to my mothers story. Though I knew better, I let my mind wonder about the past I was never allowed to have.

Unsurprisingly, as my thoughts were already troubled over my relationship with Benny, I was now plagued with a new set of worries. What would have happened if I'd been given the right to claim that I was somehow part of Shadow Pack, instead of being considered an outcast? Would I be worthy of my little omega then? Or would I have ended up with someone else?

In theory, I felt I could have had a mate, in spite of the rules set by my parents deal. So what then? What if I hypothetically had one but I didn't know it because my mother had never been honest with me about my father? Would this supposed mate be okay without me or would my abandonment caused them to suffer? Maybe I didn't even have a mate and that was part of their deal? Then I had the worst of all thoughts.

What if Benny was supposed to be mine all along?

What if that's why I had always felt strong feelings of attachment towards him and why I could never walk away? From the moment I first laid eyes on him, I knew I had to get his attention. I was obsessed with showing off what a good Dom I could be for him when he didn't even know me. What if there was a reason behind that? And to that end, what if my failure to be born an alpha was the reason Benny had ended up so hurt and alone? He'd suffered through monstrous circumstances without me by his side, ready to be his protector.

I should have known what a nest was! I should have known what it meant to claim him and how to do it! Shouldn't I?

Of course, logically, this type of thinking could be a stretch of my imagination. Presumptuous even, but I couldn't shake the feeling that everything my sweet boyfriend had suffered through was somehow my fault. Fuck, was I crazy for thinking like this? For feeling responsible? Maybe I was just trying to justify why Benny should belong to me? Or, maybe I was right? Could I be right? And if I was, what did that mean for us?

I went back and forth with myself until my brain hurt and I forced myself to stop worrying about it. I was just a human after all, no matter who my father was. I had to remember that. My worries were probably for nothing. The only thing that really mattered was how I felt about the omega and, in that moment, I'd never been more thankful that he gave me the time of day and that he always came back to me.

"Good morning Master," Benny murmured, breaking me out of my desperate musings as he leaned up to kiss me.

I sighed wistfully, having hoped he'd call me alpha again, but I said nothing about it and kissed him back.

"I can't believe you're still here," he murmured softly with a shy look.

I chuckled in response and rolled him on his back, "I do live here you know," I teased as I ran the tip of my nose against his.

"That's not what I-" he started before I shut him up by leaning into another kiss.

"I also told you that you're stuck with me," I reminded him gently before trailing a line of kisses down his jaw and neck, inhaling his delectable scent as I kissed.

It was sharper than normal and I could almost make out each of the individual scent notes that always alluded me, certain that at least one of them was lavender. The other somehow reminded me of a slow, rainy afternoon. I wanted more. His scent was so thick I could nearly taste it and I wanted to drink I him in. Without thinking I slowly ran my tongue down his neck, across the juncture where the pale column met his shoulder. I only realized my mistake when the smaller man stiffened beneath me. I pulled back quickly but my omega wailed pathetically in response; a chilling sound that was filled with both pain and longing. Then he offered up more of his neck. He looked so unguarded and alluring like that. I almost wanted to clamp my teeth down on that spot, holding on for dear life, but I held back from the strange temptation. I didn't understand why I felt like this but I also knew I needed to reign myself in before I did something extremely stupid.

Benny shivered lightly when I reluctantly stayed away. "Alpha?" he questioned softly. Then he gave me a look so vulnerable that I instantly felt guilty for how I'd gotten him to call me alpha.

"Sorry baby. I know I shouldn't touch you there. I got a little carried away but I won't let it happen again," I explained feeling deeply ashamed of my actions.

The omega pouted at me, "Don't stop," he pleaded, even as I shook my head no. "Please?" he begged before offering up his neck once more.

"I don't want to confuse you," I reminded him and, with great effort, I ignored the seductive offer in favor of kissing my way down his chest. To my surprise Benny stopped me and wrapped his arms around my head, pulling my face back into the side of his neck, back into temptation.

"My alpha can touch me wherever he wants," he insisted. Hearing him say that sent a thrill of pleasure down my spine that was immediately soured by his following words. "It doesn't matter if it makes me uncomfortable or desperate or confused. Do whatever you want to me. Please, don't stop."

"Now Benjamin," I lightly scolded, barely able to keep a hold of myself with how he begged but I felt like stopping mattered more. "It does matter how you feel. It always has. I'm not going to torture you," I explained as I kissed his forehead.

"But you love torturing me!" He protested with an annoyed huff.

I sat up and ran my fingers through my hair, feeling unreasonably hurt and irritated with him for saying that. "Not like that!" I nearly growled as I glared down at him. "I'm not going to use your wolf stuff against you. Even if I have your permission. I won't be like them. I won't force you to lose yourself! It's not some fun little game for me to see you out of your mind with a need I can't meet. I won't be the reason you're like that." I was nearly yelling at this point but the intensity of my desire to be different from the humans that abused him was unparalleled.

"But-"

"No Benjamin! Do not ask again. Don't you remember what you were like? You were so lost and miserable when I couldn't reciprocate in the way you needed, because, despite what you call me, we both know I'm not a real alpha. I'm useless for you in that way. So I refuse to purposely confuse you like that again. I'm sorry I got you worked up over it to begin with. I shouldn't have. I fucked up."

"But.. you agreed to spend my heat with me," he argued, sounding devastated. "D-don't you get that I will crave an alpha during my heat? I always do.. that's kind of the point! And.. even though it's not logical, I don't care what you say! You're not useless. You are my alpha! At least to me and my omega. I can't help feeling like that, so why wouldn't I want you there? And yes, there's a very good chance that I might get confused again. I mean.. honestly, it'll probably be even worse than the night I wanted you to claim me. I can't imagine a moment of it where I won't be begging for your bite. It's not my fault but it's also not yours! Every omega wants to be claimed during heat and I know you can't. I'm okay with that. I'm going into this knowing that I'll be denied and I've accepted that. I am sorry though.. I thought you understood what you were getting yourself into," the omega revealed timidly.

"It'll be worse if I'm there?" I asked, caught off guard. I supposed that made sense but I still hadn't expected to hear it. I thought my presence would bring comfort to Benny during his heat. I didn't know that I was signing up to cause him more distress. I didn't want that. I never wanted to be the source of his unhappiness and I couldn't bare the idea of watching him suffer if everything I did to help only made things worse. "Then maybe.. perhaps it's a better idea if I don't join you during your heat?" I suggested, realizing all too late that it was the worst thing I could have possibly said.

The omega's face dropped and he turned deathly pale. He didn't say anything for the longest time and only played with the bedsheets. Then he suddenly looked up at me, begging me with his eyes to change my mind but I wasn't so sure I should. I didn't want to make him suffer, despite what he thought, and part of me didn't trust that he knew what was best for himself.

"I knew it. I knew you'd change your mind. I'm such an idiot! Of course you don't want to be there. What kind of person would want a ruined omegas heat." He spoke in a small, bitter, defeated sort of tone and I instantly wished I could take my words back.

"Benny, I-" I started softly but he shook his head miserably and rolled over, as if he wanted to get out of bed. I pulled him back, unable to allow him out of my sight when I'd made him so upset. "And just where do you think you're going?" I inquired gruffly, as I held him down protectively. I knew how his feet must ache from our scene the night before and the very idea that he would get up to walk on his own angered me.

Benny blinked in surprise, probably not expecting my harsh tone, but I couldn't help myself. I was feeling way more possessive than normal, in addition to hating myself for upsetting my sweet omega.

"You smell so-" he started and then promptly blushed and changed the subject. "I.. I was just going to use the bathroom," he answered sadly. When I continued to keep him from moving he softly added, "Is that alright with you?"

"Do you really have to go or are you just trying to run away?"

Benny blushed prettily, "I have to go," he insisted as he tried to remove my hand from pinning his shoulder.

"Don't you think you should be asking for my help little pup?" I inquired, needing him to know that he could still depend on me.

"To piss? No. I don't need-" he started to protest.

"No? Alright then," I conceded, letting him go so that he could attempt to get up.

Benny gave me a defiant look as he threw his legs over the side of the bed and gingerly stepped down. He gasped in pain the moment he applied pressure to his feet and crumpled to his knees. He looked up at me with a stubborn grimace before attempting to pitifully crawl towards the bathroom. His progress was impeded when I got out of bed and lightly tapped his ass with my foot, watching as he collapsed once more with a surprised yelp. Benny gave up then and waited for me to pick him up but he mewled in protest when I put him back in the bed.

"Ask for my help or you're not going anywhere," I warned but my omega only glared before laying back down to ignore me. "Sweetheart, look at me," I pleaded when he continued to ignore me for another five minutes, even turning away when I brushed the hair off of his forehead. "Benny, please?" I begged after three more minutes of silence had passed between us. The omega finally glanced my way when I crawled over and, though he looked displeased, he did not resist when I proceeded to settle my weight on top of him. "Puppy, you have to know, I don't see you as ruined. You were hurt by humans and that's not your fault. Please try and understand what I meant about your heat. It's just that, I'm human.. like them. Maybe I'll trigger bad memories? I might even scare you. Neither of us know if my presence will hurt you or not but you seem to think I'll drive you crazy. I don't like that. I don't want you to suffer any more than you already have."

Benny squirmed a little as my weight added to the pressure against his bladder but he refused to look me in the eye. "I think I would know how much suffering I can handle. You've put me through plenty," he muttered petulantly.

"That is different! Don't act like a brat!" I snapped, causing the boy to instantly bare his neck in a show of submission while his cheeks depended in color.

"But l-last night, I thought you said-" he started to say but stopped himself, looking embarrassed and started again. "Look, just because you know about the incident now, and you know that I go a little crazy when I feel the need to be claimed, it doesn't mean I need you to treat me like I'm made of glass," he informed me, sounding as if he didn't quite believe his own words while he struggled beneath me.

"Doesn't it?" I replied as I pinned his arms above his head with one hand.

"No! I can handle you and anything you throw at me!" He snapped with a look of utter defiance.

"Is that so?" I asked softly while I gently pressed on his lower abdomen until his face crumpled adorably in anguish.

"Fuck," Benny whimpered, "I really have to go now."

"I'm sure you do baby. And you need my help so just ask. It's not that hard," I purred in his ear and then traced the outline with the tip of my tongue, causing him to shudder involuntarily.

"I already asked for your help! I was completely honest and told you my deepest, darkest secret but now that you know the truth and you've had time to think, you don't want my heat. You changed your mind, just like Drew," he retorted weakly while he continued to shiver beneath me.

"Puppy-"

"Don't-" he protested as he looked away.

"Shh, honey look at me. You've got this all wrong. Haven't you been listening? I didn't change my mind, not in the way you're thinking. Last night you were in an extremely emotional state. Were you even thinking clearly when you asked me to join you? I just don't know if it's a good idea. I still want you and I'm not going anywhere. I want to help you through your heat. I really do but I also don't want you confused and out of your mind when I can't do anything more. I want what's best for you. I swear I'm not rejecting you Benny. I just don't want to make anything worse," I explained as delicately as I could while caressing the side of his face.

"You won't make it worse. Being with you could never be as bad as being alone. Please don't leave me alone," he whined desperately, once more turning his slender neck to me, inviting me close and driving me crazy with desire. "Please spend it with me like you said? I won't cause a scene. I'll be so good. I promise I won't make you feel bad for not being born an alpha. In fact, I'll never ever bring it up again if I can help it! I just want you. I swear. Please stay with me."

I sighed in frustration, wishing I could make the younger man understand. He wasn't doing anything wrong by wanting an alpha and a small part of me insisted that I really could be all the alpha he needed. He accepted me. I could make him feel good and I cared about him so much. He always came back to me. I was in love with him. He was mine. His heat should be mine! Shouldn't it?

It was so wrong of me to try and back out when my omega needed me. It seemed I had no other option. It's not like I wanted him to spend his heat with someone else or worse alone and feeling rejected. If he was going to be this upset about it, then I really did have to join him. I took no time to reflect on the strength of my desires, not noticing how they felt so deeply imbedded into my brain that they almost felt like instincts. However, whatever rearranging was happening inside my mind was far less appealing to me than reassuring my hypersensitive omega.

"Alright. You win. I'll spend your heat with you. Hush now. There's no reason for you to be this upset. You know I won't abandon you if you need me. I never have and I never would." I finally said before I kissing his cheek, careful to avoid his offering, even though I wanted nothing more than to ruin that spot. I wanted to bite that bit of exposed skin until it bled.

"Promise me," Benny insisted as he gripped my shoulder tight, probably fearing that I'd back out again.

"I do promise. I shouldn't have gone back on what I said in the first place. I'm sorry puppy. I just.. I have a lot on my mind and the last thing I want to do is make your life worse but you need me. I understand that and I'll be there. There's no where else I'd rather be. Now, please, lets forget I was an idiot by letting me make it up to you." I promised as my hand slowly crept beneath his slim form, between his asscheeks, rubbing the wetness I found there back into his skin. "I want to play a game."

"But what about-" he began to object, even as a trickle of slick moistened his little hole for my intruding fingers.

"The fact that your desperate to relieve yourself?" I asked while grinding my hard cock against his lower abdomen, smiling when he grimaced beneath my assault. "Can you hold it pet?" I asked as I punctuated my words with a harsh tug to his balls.

The omega gasped as he squeezed his eyes shut in concentration. "I-I don't know," he admitted as he squirmed. "Maybe for a little while? Are you sure you're going to spend my heat with me?"

"Yes baby. Now, stop worrying and focus on what I'm going to do to you," I ordered, moving so that I could push his thighs back against his belly, exposing his warm, sopping wet hole. Benny moaned in anguish as the new position put more pressure on his bladder.

"Oh please! I-I don't think-" he begged desperately.

"You don't need to think baby. You're far to pretty to waste time filling your little brain with worries," I teased while rubbing the pad of my thumb against his soaked, sticky hole.

"Yes! I-I'm just your dumb slut. Your stupid little biii- I -ugh I can't! Alpha please! I can't do it!"

"Then ask for my help," I answered calmly while inserting the tip of my thumb.

"But I.. I don't.." he let his sentence die away and sucked in a harsh breath when I pushed my thumb all the way inside of him.

"Come on pet. Try harder to hold it for me. Think how humiliating it would be if you pissed in your alpha's bed like an untrained pup! You'd completely ruin my mattress," I teased as I leaned forward to murmur the words against my omegas lips while he trembled for me.

Benny turned away from my kiss and his cheeks turned bright red. He scrunched his eyes shut with a quivering breath and bit his lip in concentration, staying silent for several seconds before whimpering, "I really am trying Alpa."