The Throw Away & the Catcher

"Do whatever you want about a divorce, that is your decision, I hoped you loved me enough but clearly you don't."

I couldn't believe this was the woman I'd lived with for 20 years and known for 22. That woman would not behave in this way.

"Goodbye, Sally, I'd say "I'll miss you" but after the last months I don't know if that's true anymore." I shook my head and left; my heart was breaking despite my words. I just couldn't believe my life had turned to such shit.

Three hours late I got a text from Sally, it had an attachment and simply said "Enjoy cuckold."

I opened it and it was a dick pic, showing the biggest cock I've ever seen close to Sally's face and her face had been showered in cum. I assumed that Katie had been right that Brian was the guy she had in mind, after all if you are going to trade in, why not trade up too? Certainly, it wasn't something I could complete with.

I briefly thought of deleting it, then thankfully I filed it away, I'd maybe use it to damage her, maybe her parents might need convincing that I had a good reason for divorce.

Chapter 8 -- Things Get Even Uglier

Next day I went back to talk to the lawyer I'd seen 11 weeks ago. I asked her to draw up divorce papers, she asked for financial details so she could work on a settlement offer. In looking for the details, I was shocked to see that our savings account had been emptied, a pre-emptive strike by Sally. Our current account was joint and only 100 remained.

The lawyer told me that usually when someone cleared out bank accounts, they were either being vindictive, they were the ones looking for somewhere to live or both. I explained that Sally had owned the apartment we lived in so that just left vindictive.

We figured out that I had at least got a credit card to use to find somewhere to live -- I'd keep my room in the cheap motel I'd been in for the last 2-3 months and just as importantly for the lawyer, to pay her retainer.

She told me that the money taken would be accounted for when a division or settlement was agreed and that as it could only be construed as a vindictive act, that I may well get more than a 50:50 split in assets if we got a judge that didn't hate men.

I texted Sally, and asked, "Did you have to be such a cunt? You've left me with nothing. Why? All I tried to do was love you."

Chapter 10 -- Surprise Surprise

To my surprise she replied within an hour later and said, "I'm sorry Paul, that was a tacky thing to do I'll put money back to make your 50% whole again and while I'm apologising, I'm sorry for the picture I send you, seems my judgement is not all it could be. I hope you deleted it?"

I'm decided not to reply straightaway until I got my hands on the money. The money was there next day so I closed out the joint accounts and opened my own.

That night she messaged again, "I see you closed the joint accounts. I suppose that was no surprise after what I did, but it seems very final. Have you decided to walk away? I'm sorry Paul, I've been making some terrible decisions, Will you come and talk again, I want to put things right between us, I'm so sorry."

Nothing ventured nothing gained, I did call over to talk again and she could hardly have been more different than the triumphalist bitch she'd been the night she got the big cock.

Before I called in, I expected nothing but to confirm our marriage was over and to try to sort things out as easily as we could. When I arrived, she greeted me in tears. You could have knocked me down with a feather, I'd expected absolutely any other reaction but not this.

I was so surprised that I let her hug me and she cried hard on my shoulder, soaking my shirt with her tears. Through habit I couldn't yet throw off I let her weep and kept a comforting arm around her.

She finally choked out, "Paul I'm so, so sorry, can you try to forgive me, I've been an idiot, I love you despite my dumb actions. I've made horrible decisions, I tried to pretend that you were to blame for everything, but I understand that I am the one who has driven you away behaving like no wife should. Believing that I looked great at 40 and so deserved more than you were giving me. I blanked out and downright ignored all the good things you do for me without any side to your actions, nothing expected in return. I'm ashamed of myself, my parents didn't raise me to be a selfish heartless bitch. Nobody should treat their husband the way I've treated you."

"Paul, please still love me, forgive me, I know I've betrayed you and given to Brain what I should never have shared, tell me it's not too late."

I wiped her eyes with my thumbs and asked her where this change of heart was coming from?

"From your friend Katie, Paul, she told me how hard you'd worked and that I had set you up to fail. She actually told me that if I was determined to throw you away, she was going to try to catch you. That scared me, she's really cute."

"Sally, I've been hurt pretty badly, you haven't lied as such but I'm wondering how I trust you again, how will I ever know if you want more big cock like Brian gave you? I'm not sure I can get past this."

"Paul you are right, I haven't lied to you, but I understand your concern so let me tell you something. I hated fucking Brian, honestly it hurt me really badly, I was sore for 3 or 4 days afterwards. The worst part was that he didn't care that I was not enjoying it, he was as selfish as I've been. That thing just is not fun. Paul I've a really bad case of buyer's remorse, I don't want that thing ever again, I want my husband, please give me another chance, I'll never let you down again. Besides you look fantastic, Katie has done a great job with you, please forgive me."

I was in complete shock, this was not what I thought I'd be listening to tonight, I thought we were finished, I'd prepared for accepting that we were over. Now the only question was, do I want this, has there been too much hurt?

Of course, I knew that although I had grown to dislike the bitch who had taken over my wife's body, underneath I had not been looking forward to losing her and having to start again in my forties.

"Sally, I think I'll always love you, but these last few months have really shaken me, the months before that were the worst of our marriage. I'd love to say, of course I forgive you, but Sally, I'm not sure I can."

She looked crestfallen and the tears started again, "Won't you even try? I mean look what you've done with Katie's help and your dedication."

I looked her square in the eye and said, "Sally, I had my lawyer draw up divorce papers, if you ever pull shit like this again, I'll have them filed in a heartbeat."

"So..." she looked hopeful, and I nodded my head to say that yes, we will try again.

"Don't ever test me again, I'm going to try to get past what you've done, I hope I can, but I will never forget that you have been unfaithful and that you seemed to take pleasure in "punishing" me with that freak. To be honest I'm delighted it hurt, you certainly fucking didn't deserve to enjoy that. We have a hard road ahead of us but I'm all in to try. Just understand that you only ever get one second chance."

Chapter 11 -- What's Next

Well, that could have been the end of the tale, forgiveness and happily ever after, maybe a late child or two. Didn't happen, no fairy tale rebirth of the marriage.

Two months later I was no closer to getting past her treachery and Brian's massive cock that she claimed had hurt her was almost a physical presence in our bedroom, like a giant elephant sized cock that she couldn't forget because I couldn't forgive.

I was still hitting the gym, with the pressure of her deadline gone I actually started to enjoy it and with proper diet and still some direction from Katie, I was losing fat and gaining muscle at an appropriate rate and realised that I not only felt better but I clearly looked better. I felt more alive and healthier too.

Every cloud has a silver lining and if my marriage had been damaged, my self-esteem had slowly recovered from her betrayal, and I started to understand that I was now getting the sort of checking out and glances in mirrors that Sally had so treasured about herself.

I'll admit it felt good to be considered attractive again, why I'd just given up I really couldn't understand.

Things were getting tense, Sally may have acted like she was dumb, but she isn't, I knew we were not getting past what she had done, so did she. One night after dinner, it all came pouring out.

"This isn't working Paul, you can't forgive, so I can't forget, we are stuck, and we are falling apart. For God's sake go out and find someone to fuck, I can't see you getting past this any other way. I think you need to fuck someone and if you need to then rub my face in it as revenge, as I did to you, just do it. I hope it'll get us past this and that I can forgive myself and you as well. I know I did this to us, I know you need to fix this for yourself, find someone and fuck the shit out of her as many times as you need, but please don't fall in love with her."

I nodded grimly, this might work, certainly nothing else had, it's worth a try. I'm at the end of my rope, can't get past what she did, not so much what she did but how she did it, the utter disrespect of what and how she did it. My feelings weren't a consideration, I had no part in the decision-making, but shit I've already told you all this.

"OK Sally, I'll give it a try, no certainties, no guarantees and fuck it I might find someone who I could make a life with, that is the risk of what we are signing up to, get it?"

"Yes, I get it Paul, this is the last chance saloon, it's like we are standing outside the door of the divorce court as things are. Last roll of the dice before we face the inevitable of what I've done to us."

That night I went to the gym, I'd a session booked with Katie, we got to work but I wasn't feeling it, she could see I wasn't committed, and my workout was sloppy. After 20 minutes she called a halt.

"OK, Paul take a break, what is your problem? Your head is somewhere but it's not in the room with me, what is going on, I know your mind is not on what we are doing. Spill?"

"OK Katie, lets get a drink and sit down, this could take a while."

We got energy drinks, though God knows I really hadn't expended much. She was right my mind was far from in what I should be doing, barely trying, not really listening, it was the worst session I'd ever given her.

Spill is exactly what I did, I told her everything, the whole back story, Sally's dalliance with Brian, how we'd tried to get past what she'd done and how it really wasn't working. Finally, I told Katie what Sally had asked me to do to see if that would get us past our feelings of separation.

As I explained it, I used these words, "...so, we have agreed that I find someone I find attractive and I have as much sex as I need with them to feel I'd avenged what Sally did with Brian, hoping that that triggers something in either or both of us to help us move on. Sounds, fucking crazy, doesn't it?"

Katie looked at me, shaking her head from side to side, agreeing that the plan was pure nuts. Suddenly a huge smile broke out on her face, "I've two questions about this."

I shrugged giving her the go ahead.

"Does Sally understand that she might lose you to this mysterious woman?"

"Yeah, we talked, she begged me to do what I need but please don't fall in love. What is the second question?"

"Can I apply for the job?" asked Katie, her smile growing ever bigger. "I told Sally that if she was dumb enough to drop you, I'd be hoping to be there to catch you. I'd like to try out for the job if you'll have me."

Chapter 12 - Test Driving Katie

When Katie put herself forward to be my "new woman" I was surprised, we'd got to know each other well over recent months, she'd looked out for me, tried to steer me on how not to fuck up my health and when she knew I wasn't going to reach Sally's punishing deadline, she told me so.

There had been no doubting whose side she'd been on, she'd even told me that she know Sally had been close to Stewart but also the unknown for me, to Brian as well.

Katie had never steered me wrong, she was a complete straight shooter, what I didn't ever get the impression of was that she was seemingly interested in me as a person. I thought I was just her professional project.

Katie is about 10 years younger than me; she is physically fit and athletic in appearance and my is she cute. So cute that I would haven honestly thought that she was several miles out of my league. Now she was telling me she wanted to be the lady I "used" to get past Sally' betrayal. I was stunned.

"Katie, if you are genuinely interested, I'd be honoured to go out with you and explore where this goes. Of course, you understand that I'm supposed to be starting from a position of not falling in love, obviously you know I'm married but in a troubled marriage. Katie, with all the problems, I'm so thrilled that you want to be involved, I would hate to do anything to hurt you, you've been my rock over these months. Are you good with all that?"

"I know Paul that you are not supposed to fall in love, but you only have so much control over that, what happens will happen, but I'll tell you this, I have a head start on you, there is no rule saying I can't fall in love, and no rule to say that you can't either. I like a challenge; I intend to make you want me in every way I can."

And so, it was decided, when I when home and told Sally that Katie was who I was going to see she wept huge tears, she knew Katie was interested, she feared that she would lose me.

On the fourth date with Katie, the third time we'd slept at her apartment after our date, we decided that I'd move in with her. We had months of working closely together, trusting each other that we had a big head start over couples just starting out and testing the water.

What I was feeling with Katie was so comfortable, someone I didn't have to second guess if they had another agenda, she's more or less told me before we went out at all that she felt desire if not exactly love for me.

It was our second date, when we were in bed for the first time that she used the four letter word, after she urged me to "fuck" her harder and I had, she whispered in my ear in the afterglow, "I love you, I have done for a few months, my heart is yours to make or break."

There were no sides to Katie, what you see is what you get, not like the woman I'd loved for so long who had grown to look down on me, lost her love for me and betrayed me, rubbing the betrayal in my face, then regretting it ultimately and was now trying to find her way back to me.

When Katie told me she loved me, I knew in my heart that I loved her back, but life for me was not just that simple, I had a wife, a wife of 20 years. I'd resisted opening my thoughts to Katie in that instant and feared I may have blown the best thing that could happen to me.

Katie was made of better stuff. She understood my inner turmoil and unusual circumstances, there in her bed with the full knowledge of my wife, supposedly getting even, but that is not what was happening.

I wasn't getting even, I was getting my head together, my thoughts in order, my priorities right. I'd told her I had deep feelings for her, but I didn't use the word love. She understood, fuck it was complicated.

Nights two and three together happened quickly and within a few days I knew, my course was plotted, I'd never been more certain of anything, definitely not within the last year.

I told Katie "I love you Katie, I want us to be together, I'm going to tell Sally it's over and I'm filing or divorce. Are you sure you want this Katie; can you see yourself as my wife? I'm not asking you just to have a backup plan, I'm divorcing Sally either way and I want you in my life, for the rest of my life."

That beautiful smile that I'd quickly grown to love just got wider and wider, it would have taken something seriously strong to wipe it off her face.

She simply said, "I knew I could make you love me Paul, it was easier than teaching people to lose weight, I've loved you for months, I just needed the chance to show you. I can't wait to be your wife, but of course, I will, I know it will take time."

Chapter 13 - Unlucky for Some

As often happens in life, when someone gets a big win, someone else gets a big loss, occasionally a devastating one.

When I'd told Sally that Katie was who I was hoping to work my problems out with, I knew she was devastated. I think I could have given her 99 other names and she'd have thought she stood a fighting chance of me coming back to her. Not with Katie, Katie had warned her, she was ready to catch me if Sally threw me away.

In fairness to Sally, she had seen the writing on the wall, it didn't come as a big shock when I told her I'd very quickly fallen in love with Katie, that I wanted us to have a peaceful divorce without rancour, to do it with civility and as much kindness as 22 years together should allow.

In that respect she was magnificent, no silly conditions, no posturing, no ridiculous demands. When it was all done, we hugged tightly and briefly, wept in each other's arms, her more sadly than me, as Katie watched on, no resentment from her, a fitting acknowledgement of our long time together.

As we broke apart after a few minutes, Sally hugged Katie and said, "Look after our man, Katie. I've been such a fool, take good care of him or else." Then with a forced smile she quietly walked away, head held high but betrayed by her shoulders shaking with her grief."