The Trust Me Pill Ch. 03

Very fun story series and I like the twist of the fake pills. Very good read.

Great Story

The storyline has great potential. The implementation is captivating and exciting. According to my impression, however, the 3rd part has lost some of the tension that carried the story in the 1st and 2nd parts. A lot of things are too pre-programmed. That was also the case in the first two parts, but there it fit into the arc of suspense. The 3rd part can not hold this arc, the tension is somewhat lost. Nevertheless, it is wonderful to read, because with your style you build up the pictures beautifully in the imagination.

In my opinion, a 4th part should live more of the contradiction in Steven - between justifying trust and testing the limits of one's own dark imagination. That could fit and maybe there is a way out that can do justice to both. But I myself have not yet thought of the Sotryline any further.

Keep going, the story is good and has potential. She will probably be able to meet the girlfriend again. ;)

Thanks for the comments, and your patience in working through it. I would hope that it would be clearer in the first story that the whole drug is fake. She's pretending to be an obedient zombie and enjoying her husband's desires. Sure it's modeled after the standard "remote control" story, but she does everything willingly. It's up to her.

I agree that the next chapter should resolve her obvious willingness to do about anything, and his desire to subject his wife to the wildest things that a loving husband shouldn't with that amount of control. The problem is I don't know if it's better to resolve that or leave them as they are. Is the reality of knowing they'll each do anything? or is better on one hand satisfying your partner's every desire and on the other having a plaything that that you exploit but yet love and situationally protect?

Feedback? Okay, by Chapter three, I was just scrolling on through looking for something interesting.

While I can appreciate a loving couple experimenting, I think the overall story really lost something because the wife didn't seem to care about everything that happened. Any woman in the world would have a million questions and sit her husband down for a lengthy interrogation after the first date. It's just not female nature to be so blasé about something that was fun, risky, naughty, sexy and adventurous. She'd want to know everything, and in detail, something that would have been a big turn-off for the husband because while the night might have been fun... he would know after the first time that the interrogation was coming and not look forward to it.

It's one thing to not remember the details, but quite another to get pics and videos, little snippets showing her having a great time, and just not care about all that she missed out on. Maybe the first time would have been okay, but the second time would have left her feeling a bit "left out" like she had a split personality or it was her twin sister in all the pics. She knows she did the stuff, but she's so detached from it that it feels like it wasn't her at all, except that she knows it was. But it feels almost like she found out her husband is having an affair with a woman who looks remarkably similar to her.

Secondly, to the above point, there was no conflict. Conflict can be good or bad, and it's realistic. It adds suspense and tension, and makes the resolution all the sweeter for it. I'm not suggesting that they would fight and fall out of love or get divorced. Just that it would have been interesting if there was some kind of internal dialogue going on to show that the wife didn't actually like what was happening, or didn't think she would like it and ended up loving it. Something. Anything. I get that they love each other and don't want to hurt one another, but they are portrayed as uber-perfect people who know each other and themselves down to the last molecule.

Instead of conflict, we got perfect compliance with perfect scenarios. She was like a very boring robot. As I got into Ch3, there wasn't really any need to read the sex scenes because it had already been done, imo. In writing, it reads the same whether she's recounting an orgy in college, a fantasy she's thinking, or actually participating in an orgy with her husband and friends. There was nothing particularly special about any of them because even the stuff in college where she was taken advantage of is looked back on with fondness and laughter.

Thirdly, it's the unintended or unforeseen that really gets my attention. This is a drug that can wipe out six hours of memory while also making the woman extremely compliant to suggestions or orders. It's also not been through clinical trials and passed whatever needs passing to get on the legal market. And on top of that, somehow the people who created it didn't see any of that happen. Or if they did, they decided to put it on the black market instead of keeping it for their own uses.

Okay. I can accept all of that as entirely possible. Where you lose me is when it all goes off without a hitch. Everything works perfectly.

It all works perfectly? No adverse side-effects even though women differ from one to the next? One pill is as good for her as it was for every other woman regardless of differences in age, weight, ethnicity, estrogen levels or whatever? Really?

When we first met her friend at the convention, she mentioned something about loving threesomes and how she kind of got "hooked" on them. I thought that was foreshadowing, that maybe there was a side-effect to the pills that embedded certain behaviors or ideas. Nothing super-overt since the inventors would have seen that right off the bat and kept the fun to themselves, but the fact that she was acting rather out of character for the average woman, actually preferring two guys at a time, and the fact that she'd been taking the pills pretty regularly... well, it seemed like that was a hint of things to come.

Plus, to meet a friend she hadn't seen in ages, and they get right into the sex talk? And this friend decides to give her a few of what's a very limited supply? I can understand trying to get into the meat of the story, but that part seemed rushed. The friend came across as a recruiter as much as anything else. Maybe someone who was so beaten down by life abroad, trained to some degree by the constant exposure to the pills, that she's always looking for another woman to recruit because it makes her feel less like a failure. Maybe she was just angry and jealous, seeing her friend looking so beautiful and happy, even after having a kid, that she wanted to bring her down a notch -- like, "How dare she be happy when my life sucks and I have crow's feet!!"

Women do get catty like that, after all. Even very good friends can do things out of spite and we see that happening every single day. Maybe she hadn't intended to do it, but as she heard the "perfect life story" spilled out over lunch, it makes her a bit mad and jealous because she wanted that for herself but could never find it. Maybe that's why she was using the pill so much - just a desperate attempt to mask the pain of loneliness and sorrow, much like how people turn to alcohol.

Or it could have been completely subconscious, something she had been trained to do by the exposure to the pills and all the suggestions she'd listened to. Nothing blatant, but more like every "suggestion" sticks a little bit, maybe 10%. Over time, that would shape how she thinks but nobody, including her, would be aware anything was happening. And that would explain how the drug made it to the black market without the creators just keeping it for themselves.

When the husband made the comment about how he wished she'd throw away all her dull bras, I thought that was a prelude to the next scene where we'd see her causally bagging up all her boring bras for the trash and not thinking anything of it. She doesn't think it's odd or worth mentioning. Maybe she believed it was just a nice thing to do or that dressing a little sexie was something she just genuinely wanted to do. He doesn't notice that she's stopped wearing her dull bras, let alone that she threw them away, because he's focused on his good luck and thinking the old bras are still in the drawer somewhere. Or he does notice after a month and mentions it. She responds with, "Oh, that? All this sexy action just kinda reminded me that I'll be old and droopy soon enough and I should look sexy for as long as I can, as often as I can. Sexy bras and panties are a small way of doing that -- and they sure keep your attention!"

And neither ties it to the "command" he gave her because it just doesn't stick out in their memories. Just like they don't think about all the other ways she's changed because it's such a slow and gradual process that simply doesn't stand out.

As I said before, I can appreciate wanting to write about a loving couple just having some fun. The overall story was good and I like that you took the time to really develop the characters and the setting. Top marks for everything, honestly.

If there is a Chapter 4, I'd very much like to see it include more about the realities of the drug or some kind of conflict and resolution that adds an element of suspense.

WOW THOSE CIALIS CONVENTIONS WERE NEVER THAT EXCITING. but the ladies were the best ever. What a great tale. The whole premise was thrilling and the execution improved with each of the 3 pills, with the shoe store tantalizing and the insertion of Tim spectacular. This deserves a 10 and her reaction at the end is just the best that a typical monogamous reader like me could ever want. BRAVO.