All Comments on 'The Wild West and Sex Slavery Ch. 01'

Love it! I anxiously await the next chapter!!!

It's great to see a completely fresh new take on the Lit trope of modern slavery. I think this is a very promising start.

Well, an unexpected, but very nicely portrayed, twist to the slavery genre. The explanation for the paintball was unique and very creative. Some of the overall slavery contracts were convoluted and not easily followed. Oh, nice spin on this issue.

Indeed, plot line looks generic, but tons of imaginative fresh details really make for a great read. Near perfect introduction to universe and main cast. Hope there are more chapters to come, with similarly high level character interactions and plot twists.

Thanks and all the best.

The exposition here feels like it's worst of both worlds. You're having characters dump out tons of info that everyone involved should already know, so you don't really get a cleanly written history but it also feels really forced. Either sneak in the exposition or directly give it to us, but this compromise is terrible.

Among many questionable elements of worldbuilding, somehow the least believable is that free staters under God would accept a microchip implant given to outsiders.

Most the other commentary comes from coined niche experts. As a more generalist fiction reader this is very very good. McCarthy would do more showing than telling but you're getting your story on paper and it's interesting and honest.

If it's two parts in story telling. The story and then how it's told this is more the first. But the art has been created and it's relevant like nothing I've read anywhere.

Very good satire on MAGA evangelicals