All Comments on 'Amy's Eventful Doctor Appointment Pt. 01'

Not really into fat slob rapists. When does she grab a scalpel and cut the dicks off these pervs and slit Margot's throat.

This reads like it was written by a male non-native English speaker unfamiliar with gynecological medical appointments. I know this is fantasy, but the language used and very off descriptions of extremely common things take the reader out of the fantasy.

-

For titles, stick with one spelling - either Dr or Doctor.

-

Nurses and patients aren't called Ms First Name, and if you choose to spell out "Doctor" as part of a title, "Miss" needs to be spelled out as well. Be consistent with your style.

-

It's a paper gown. You got it right the first time, then called it a dress for the rest of the story. It's not a dress. It reads like you used a thesaurus for another word for gown. That's wholly unnecessary and just plain incorrect.

-

Paper gowns are generally huge. Most women feel like they're wearing a tent. 36Ds would not strain them, especially since paper gowns don't close. Also, when visiting a gynecologist, women usually wear the paper gown with the opening in the front.

-

The furniture with stirrups that women sit and lay on during a gynecological exam is not a chair. It's a table.

-

That's just off the top of my head. There's a lot of room for improvement in grammar, knowledge of the practices included in the story, and word choice.