Big Dave, An Autobiography Ch. 09

Then it was me. After seeing all the theatrics of the others I really couldn't compete on the muscle or athletic front, I could only do what I could do, so I did it.

I stood in front of the crowd and made myself erect.

There were a few gasps and some nervous laughter and then the bidding was to start. But first Catherine had an announcement:

"Ladies, ladies, this is a slightly unusual situation but we actually have a sealed bid for no.6 which will only be opened once the bidding in the room has completed. So, are we ready?"

The women all cheered "Yes!" and it started.

It was amazing to see the hands shooting up as Lady Catherine shouted out increases in the bids as if it was Monopoly money.

Eventually the bidding was silent and our host turned to the envelope.

"Before I can complete this sale, we must consult the mysterious sealed bid!" she said and ripped open the large envelope revealing a card inside.

She turned the card to show the audience and there were some gasps. The figure was nearly half again higher than the room had bid.

There was a mixture within the room of applause and expressions of sympathy to those who had failed to buy me.

Tim emerged from the side and beckoned me to follow him as the bidding commenced for number 7.

He handed me a bathrobe and I put it on and followed him up a side staircase which lead to the main galleried landing.

"Who won?" I asked, "Do you know?"

"It's a complete mystery." said Tim, "We've never had a sealed bid before. I can only imagine it is someone who was unable to attend the auction in person, but it's a pretty select group of ladies who get invites to this sort of thing......so, possibly a Royal or other celebrity, I really don't know." Tim shrugged and led me to one of the bedroom doors.

Tim unlocked and opened the door, and invited me to enter.

"Her Ladyship will be here to see you in about an hour, after everything has settled down." he said, "She asks that you shower and wear the clothes provided on the bed. There is also food on the side table. Brush your teeth afterwards. Well done and good luck." he said and closed the door as he left.

I immediately went for the food, which appeared to be left overs from the banquet, but was absolutely delicious. There was no wine but a large carafe of iced water with slices of lemon floating in it was refreshing enough and I guzzled that down.

After eating I looked at the clothes, which appeared to simply consist of bathing shorts and a rubber skull cap. I wondered if someone had made a mistake, but that seemed unlikely here where everything seems to have been thought through impeccably.

And nothing would have surprised me regarding what someone might find sexy.

I left the 'clothes' on the bed and went into the attached bathroom to have a shower.

Everything about this place astounded me, from the oil paintings on the walls to the ornate furniture and furnishings. The bathroom didn't disappoint either.

The room was probably larger than our master bedroom at home. It had a large modern corner bathtub with nozzles along the sides, a big walk-in shower with glass screens and large shower heads overhead and vertically on the wall, plus two large washbasins set into a marble counter-top, along with a porcelain toilet and a bidet. The floor and walls were all fully tiled and every sound echoed off them.

I used the toilet and then took a leisurely hot shower, using the pleasant smelling toiletries they supplied.

After I was finished I towelled myself dry with the softest, largest bath towel I had ever experienced and went back to the bedroom to dress. After donning the shorts I decided to forgo the cap until the customer arrived, so I just put on the bathrobe again and sat back on the soft bed to wait.

It was only about fifteen minutes before there was a knock at the door and Lady Catherine entered.

I immediately climbed off the bed and she looked me up and down, inspecting me for the purchaser I imagined.

"Well, what did you think of our little event?" she asked, her words a little slurred due to the drinking that had been going on.

"Impressive." was all I could think of to say.

"Yes, well, everyone appears to have had a wonderful time." She frowned, "Except, perhaps, that unfortunate waiter and the cucumber."

I waited to hear what was to happen next. But she just stood near to the doorway, swaying slightly from side to side still ensconced in her red satin ballgown.

"So....." I prompted, "What happens now? Is my purchaser here?"

"Oh my dear young man." her Ladyship spluttered, "She most definitely is."

As with my date with Gloria, it took a few beats for me to realise that she was talking about herself.

"You?" I asked, for confirmation.

Lady Catherine walked a little unsteadily towards me and stopped a couple of feet away.

"Yes." she said and giggled, "I couldn't partake of the auction myself as I am...was... the awkshi... awkshanee... I was doing it at the time, see?"

She hiccuped a little, then continued, "But I wanted to win you so I did the thing with the card. It was all above board, no cheating. In fact I paid a lot more than I needed to, but then those others hadn't spoken to your associate, who told me of all the things you get up to, you naughty boy."

I smiled at her. I was quite pleased as she was certainly a beautiful woman and very fit. I suspected there was quite a bit of horse riding in her leisure activities.

"I'm a bit surprised by the outfit, though." I said, cautiously, not wanting to offend.

"Well, let's have a look?" she said, still swaying.

I opened the robe and stood there in just the shorts, my bulge still quite prominent.

"Yes." she said, "Possibly me overthinking things. I do that sometimes. Comes from having gone to an all girls school." she added somewhat mysteriously.

"I can take them off if you're okay with that." I said.

She giggled again. "Ohhh okay, you've twisted my arms, let's have them off!"

I pushed down the shorts and stood for her naked.

There was a moments silence as she seemed to be thinking something through.

"Okay." she said, "I really need to pee. Come with." and she grabbed my hand and pulled me with her to the bathroom. Did she want me to watch her pee?

Once in the warm room with it's bright lighting and pleasant fragrances she stopped next to the shower and turned her back to me.

"Unfasten, please." she said offering up the zipper to her dress.

I did as asked and the dress was slid down off her arms and she stepped out of it. She was naked except for her shoes.

"Throw that in the bedroom would you?" she instructed me, over her shoulder, "Then come back in here."

I did as asked and returned to find her standing facing me.

She was very slender and had fairly small breasts, but they appeared firm and the nipples stood proud from their surface. Her belly was flat and her thighs lean and muscular. Between them lay her mound of neatly trimmed pubic hair with the lips of her pussy visibly protruding beneath. She was about the same height as me with her shoes still on.

She took a couple of steps towards me and pressed her lips and body against mine. We kissed for a few moments and then I felt something warm running down my thigh. She was pissing on my leg.

We both looked down at the torrent of yellow liquid streaming out of her and on to my leg.

"Ooops!" she said with a grin, and the pissing stopped. I could smell her urine and felt it beginning to cool on me.

She looked at my face, gauging whether I would run screaming from the room.

"You did tick 'yes' you know?" she said, still grinning.

To be honest, there was so many things listed on that consent form that I may have stopped paying attention when filling it out. I now just hoped I hadn't made a mistake and let myself in for something more unpleasant.

I smiled back at her and she relaxed a little.

"Not so nice when one has been drinking a lot of red wine, I do agree." she said, "But I have also had quite a lot of mineral water in the last hour, which is why I really couldn't hold on any longer. The next one should be more palatable."

She reached forward and wrapped her fingers around my dick.

"Do you have anything for me?" she asked.

I was a bit annoyed that no one had thought to tell me this was what they expected from me. I had been drinking water all day and had pee'd almost as soon as I had got to this room. I could have waited.

"I'm sorry." I said, "I went earlier. Had I known...."

"Oh silly." she said, laughing, "I'm sure you will be able to in a little while. But for now I mean....this!"

She massaged me more vigorously and I allowed myself to become hard.

"Gosh! You're a real stallion, aren't you?" she said staring at my length throbbing in her hand, "What is it like having this swinging between your legs all day long. Do you knock it on things by accident?"

"You learn not to." I replied.

"Hmmm." she said, "Lay down."

I got down onto the tiled floor, trying to avoid the puddle of her cold piss, and she stood over my waist, looking down at me.

Suddenly a spray of warm piss came from her pussy and hit my stomach until she shifted her leg slightly and it cascaded down on to my cock and balls.

This time the fluid was less of a dark yellow and the aroma wasn't as strong.

As the pee diminished she put her hand between her legs and rubbed herself, causing the last drops to spray all over my face and chest. She moaned orgasmically.

Then she lowered herself to her knees, straddling my stomach and rubbed herself in her pee on my body. She clasped me with those strong thighs and I could feel my bladder contract a little.

My cock was still hard but she didn't seem interested in that at the moment, she just seemed to be luxuriating in her own urine and my belly.

After a while she stopped moving and looked down at me with her face flushed red.

She carefully got off me, bracing herself against the shower screen so that her shoes didn't slip on the wet tiled floor.

"Better get cleaned up." she said, and kicked off her shoes as she waited for my own inelegant clambering up off the slippery floor.

She then entered the shower, placed a frilly cap over her hair and beckoned me in.

Hot water shot out of the nozzles, covering us both with cleansing water and she lathered up her hands and ran them over my chest and belly and cock.

I reciprocated, using my foamy hands to squeeze and massage her breasts and then down to her pussy and legs.

She turned off the shower but made no attempt to leave.

"Sit down." she said and pointed at the floor.

I sat with my back against the wall of the shower and she stood close to me, her crotch slightly above my face. I waited.

Once again a spray of warm liquid emerged from her, but this time she pissed onto my face. She pushed herself closer to me until her cunt was level with my nose.

"Open wide." she instructed. I reached forward with my mouth as piss poured out of her and I allowed it to enter my mouth as I pressed it against her.

She moaned and groaned at this, grabbing my hair and pulling my head hard against her gushing slit.

The pissing dwindled to a dribble once more and I was then able to taste the more familiar and agreeable flavour of her cunt. I licked at it and found her clit, but then she suddenly pulled away.

"No!" she said loudly, with a look of shock on her face.

I looked up at her, bemused.

She offered no explanation but had now made it clear that oral sex of the kind I was used to was definitely not on tonight's menu.

Once more she assisted me in cleaning her piss off. I had begun to notice my bladder grumbling a bit now and considered it was probably due to seeing her piss and also the multiple drenching showers.

With the water turned off she instructed me to lay flat on the floor and this time she straddled over my cock, holding me pointed up towards her. She then lowered herself slowly until my cock split the lips of her pussy and slid slowly inside of her.

She only took the first few inches, but held herself above me with those athletic legs of hers.

She concentrated on moving up and down on me for a few minutes until she cried out and lifted herself off my cock and pissed directly on to it. Her pee now was practically clear.

She rubbed herself again with her fingers and then put them up to her lips.

Now she eyed me.

"Your turn." she said simply, and had me stand while she sat against the wall.

I stood in front of her and she grabbed my cock and started wanking me very quickly. She kept the tip of my cock very close to her face and she slid her hand up and down over my glands.

Then she began to use both hands. It was actually a little uncomfortable so I instructed the engine room to get a move on.

I could feel the pressure build and just hoped that this was indeed what she wanted.

I let go and my jism squirted with force onto her face. She screwed her eyes tight shut as my spunk hit her forehead and ran down her face while my spurts splattered over her chin and neck and tits.

I was panting rapidly after that exertion and braced myself against the wall above her head, but she held my now wilting cock in the same position and didn't seem to want to let go.

I felt my bladder ache and realised that she wanted my piss, so I relaxed and allowed it to flow.

It came with some force so close to her face and she used the warm jet of piss to wash the semen off her face and out of her eyes, allowing her to squint up at me as my flow began to subside. She took the last of it directly into her mouth, swilled it around and then spat it to the side.

I stared down at her, my spunk dribbling down her skin pushed by a tsunami of my piss.

After a few moments she dropped my cock and grinned at me.

"Help me up, would you?" she asked and held out her hand.

Once again we stood together under the shower nozzles and watched as it washed away the urine and cum.

After towelling ourselves dry, Lady Catherine pulled back on her dress and gave me a kiss on my cheek and left.

I looked at the mess on the floor in the bathroom and wondered which poor sod was detailed to clean that up. I closed the door on the smell of piss and put the bathrobe on just as there was a knock on the door.

"Yes?" I said loudly.

The door opened and Tim was standing there with a bag containing the clothes I had arrived in.

"I understand everything went most satisfactorily." he said and handed me the clothes. "Is there anyone you need us to call regarding your departure?"

I confirmed that indeed there was and fished out the number of Brenda's hotel from the pocket of my jeans.

"Aha, yes." he said, "I know that establishment. It is rather late though, would you like me to drive you there."

"That would be good of you." I replied, "But I still need to let Brenda know I'm coming."

"Ahh yes." he said, "Your mother. Leave it to me." and with a big grin he left me to get dressed.

Tim drove me to the hotel where Brenda was waiting with the night clerk in the front lobby. I think she had come down from her room just to eye up Tim again.

I was handed a thick envelope containing the cash payment and Tim left.

I went with Brenda to the room she had booked and told her of the evening's proceedings while undressing and while she counted the cash.

"Pissing in your mouth?" she asked, somewhat horrified.

"Yeah, but don't worry, I've cleaned my teeth about four times today."

Brenda laughed and put the money away and turned off the bedside lamp.

I climbed into the bed next to her and snuggled up against her back. She grabbed my hand and pulled it around to her front, pressing it on to one of her breasts and we soon both fell asleep.