Dreams of My Desire

We were lucky enough to live close to a large university, where she was currently enrolled, so we got to have her at home for a few more years. I jumped up off the couch and sat with the girls in the kitchen while they ate. We talked about their classes and what was going on in their lives. I felt much better after getting my mind off of...other things.

I slept well that night and Sunday was spent working on projects and getting ready for the week ahead. Once my head hit the pillow on Sunday night, I was out.

I woke up to an empty bed on Monday. Paul had left for the office a few hours ago and our daughter usually left soon after for her first class. I worked from home doing web design and some occasional freelance graphic design. My schedule was a bit more flexible, which allowed me to sleep in later and pretty much set my own hours.

I took the opportunity to browse some of the message forums I had found. While I hadn't had another intense dream as I'd had a few days ago, the thought of another woman's tongue on my pussy was still driving me crazy.

I noticed that I'd been browsing for about an hour and a half and was just thinking I should probably get some work done when I found some very interesting information that shocked but captivated me. I guess work was going to have to wait.

A commenter posted a link to Reddit, specifically an entire community or subreddit. Apparently, there was a subreddit where women could meet another random person for no strings attached oral sex, or "random acts of muff diving". My pulse quickened and a jolt of excitement shot through me. Was this real? Would anyone actually do something like that? I wasn't sure that I could ever go through with it. Besides, from what I read it was mostly guys looking for women, which wasn't really what I was looking for. Still, the idea of it turned me on. I read through a few posts and I got more and more turned on thinking about making my own post, just for fun of course.

I had to force myself out of bed and focus on my work for the day. I managed to stay on task for several hours and by the time 1:30 pm came, my stomach was growling. I had chosen to skip breakfast, but there was no way I was going to pass on lunch. I made a sandwich and sat at the dining room table. I pulled my phone out and started reading a few current news articles.

I made it through two articles before my willpower caved and opened the Reddit app on my phone. I was very familiar with Reddit, but I had never used it for NSFW things. I was subbed to several communities about things I was interested in such as DIY, home improvement, web design, graphic design, etc. I knew it could be a huge time waster, but I told myself that I was just going to browse a certain subreddit. I was simply going to satisfy my curiosity a bit more and then leave.

My quick little peek turned into two hours. I found a whole new world of sex and fetish-based subreddits that I didn't know existed. I committed my favorites to memory, as I didn't want the naughty stuff filling up my innocent account. I scolded myself for wasting so much time when I had more important things to do. I put my phone away and went back to work. Our latest client needed their site finished and running soon. I had to stop letting myself be so easily distracted. I had to get a handle on all this or else I was going to end up in trouble.

I was able to stay mostly focused for the rest of the week. There were a couple of nights that my dreams were rather vivid, no doubt due to me sneaking a few peeks at some less than wholesome sites.

Unfortunately, my husband was only able to lessen my urges slightly. I heard no complaints from him as he got lucky three different nights that week though. I then spent the weekend looking at lesbian porn and reading erotic stories. I guess it was my reward for mostly behaving through the week. That's what I was telling myself anyway.

My daughter's boyfriend came over Saturday night and watched movies with us, which helped keep my mind out of the gutter. He was such a nice young man. He treated our daughter like a queen and she, in turn, treated him like a king. There was no doubt in my mind that they would marry each other someday. Hopefully, she wouldn't feel unsatisfied like me. I didn't have any right to complain, but I couldn't help feeling that something was missing from my life.

Later that night, the guilt I was feeling manifested in me riding Paul until he grunted deeply and filled me with his cum. Regardless of how bored and unfulfilled I felt with our sex life, at least Paul made sure I got mine before he got his. I knew he wasn't going to let himself go until he thought he had satisfied me, so I feigned my orgasm so he could have his.

I kissed him before rolling off of him and excused myself to the bathroom. I let his cream spill from me and flushed it away. I cleaned myself up, washed my hands, and stared at myself in the mirror. I might have looked the same on the outside, but inside, I knew I was different.

Paul was asleep when I returned to bed. I slipped under the covers and got situated. I grabbed my phone and opened the browser. No pretending to be a good girl tonight. I knew exactly what I wanted. As the image of two beautiful women making love together played on the screen, my hand wandered down between my legs. I parted my legs slightly, allowing my finger to slip between my folds.

I was drenched. My digits passed effortlessly over my slick, sensitive lips. While my fingers eased in and out of my wet center, my eyes were fixated on my phone screen. In the video, one of the women was on her back, spread out in the center of the bed. The woman with the darker hair was nestled between the other woman's legs, her tongue slowly swiping over the other woman's swollen clit. My pussy ached for the same attention. The woman on my screen was twisting her body in pleasure. I so badly wanted to hear her moans and dirty talk, but I had the volume off so that I wouldn't bring attention to what I was doing. I wanted another woman's mouth on me so fucking bad! Thoughts of me being in the other woman's place were driving me crazy. As it appeared that she was nearing her release, I worked my fingers harder into myself. I quickly changed from fingering to rubbing my clit. I was aware of the noise my fingers were making from my wetness, but I was too close to care.

Just as I felt the beginnings of my orgasm, Paul stirred in his sleep. Fuck! Why?!

I held my hand steady and locked my phone. Paul had rolled over and was now facing me. I felt him place his hand on my tummy. My skin was damp from perspiration and I was trying to control my breathing. His hand moved up and cupped my breast, softly kneading it like dough before moving down across my stomach. His fingers brushed through the short patch of hair atop my mound. He let out a small "mmmm" as he found my wet fingers pressed into my equally wet slit.

"What are you doing?" He groggily asked.

"Uhm...just thinking about...earlier." I quickly replied.

"Hmmm, ready for round two?" He questioned.

"I'm not so sure about that. I'm tired but I just couldn't sleep and thought this might help." I told him.

"Don't let me stop you." He said, still half asleep.

Shit. This wasn't the way I wanted this to go, but I needed to cum desperately. I began working my fingers around my clit in a circular motion. Paul moved his hand to my tit and pinched my nipple while I played with my button.

I could feel him beginning to get hard against my thigh. I was not in the mood for sex again. I just wanted to get off...alone. I increased the effort on my clit and soon felt the start of my climax. It was only a few more seconds before the feeling washed over me. My hips convulsed slightly as I peaked and my body relaxed as the feeling subsided.

"That was so hot." Paul commented.

I just giggled and told him goodnight. He grumbled his displeasure as I rolled over with my back to him. He put his arm around me and pulled me to him. I could feel his hardness against my bare ass. I brought my fingers up to my face and slid one into my mouth. I had grown to love my taste as well as my scent. I wondered what another woman would be like? The desire to know was raging inside of me.

I awoke to an empty bed on Saturday. Paul had mentioned that he was going to change the oil in the cars this morning, so I assumed that's what he was doing. Since I had a little time to myself, there was something I had been considering. I had been back and forth on the idea of creating an alternate Reddit account for my new NSFW interests. Ok, that was kind of a lie. What I really wanted it for was to post on a certain subreddit, but I was working up the nerves to post and I thought this would maybe help persuade myself.

I picked up my phone and opened my Reddit app. I created a new account after choosing a username and decided on a password that I wouldn't forget. I dismissed the option to save the password to my phone. I didn't want anyone to find out about my secret account. Once my account was set up, I subscribed to the subreddits I could remember, including the one I was mainly interested in. You know, the one for women looking for oral sex. I just couldn't get that fantasy out of my head. Since I had that sub opened, I got to wondering what my post would say, IF I did indeed ever make a post. I typed out my pretend message and I listed my age, that I was a female looking for another female or F4F, my location, and that I was a "Curious milf needing my pussy eaten...maybe more?"

Maybe more? Yeah, I'd definitely been thinking about that lately. This was all just a fantasy anyway...but did it have to be? Now that I had this typed out, maybe I could just hit the submit button? It was right there.

Was I going to do this? Once I crossed this line there was no going back. This would be cheating. My finger hovered over the button. I wanted this terribly. The thought consumed me but the fears of being caught also ran through my mind. There was of course the option to not respond to any comments or offers. I could just make a post to ease my curiosity. It was harmless, really. After what felt like ages, I made my decision.

I hit the submit button. I saw my post appear at the top of the list. I had a nervous feeling in my stomach. I still had an out though. I could just ignore any replies and no one would know. Like I told myself, I was really only being curious. No harm in that...right? I signed out of the app and locked my phone. I climbed out of bed and threw on some clothes. I needed coffee.

I was standing in front of the Keurig, waiting for it to fill my cup with its delicious brew when the door to the garage opened.

"Good morning...finally." Paul teased.

"Hey." I replied.

I felt like he knew what I had been up to. He walked up behind me and whispered in my ear.

"Last night was great."

"Yeah, it was nice." I replied, feeling like I was lying.

"I've got your car and Rachel's car done. I'm draining the oil in mine now. Want to grab a late breakfast or early lunch in a little bit?" Paul asked.

"Sure." I replied. I was always eager to get out of the house.

I put my coffee in my insulated cup and jumped into the shower. I resisted the temptation to check for any replies to my post. It was probably too soon to receive any. As I stood in the bathroom and stripped off my clothes, I imagined I was undressing for another woman. I ran my fingers over my skin, stopping to pinch my nipples, before cupping my steaming hot center. I could feel the wetness seeping from my slit as I watched myself in the large mirror above the vanity. There was a constant ache in my pussy that couldn't be soothed no matter what I did.

I stopped groping myself long enough to turn on the water in the shower. I stepped into our spacious shower and let the water cascade over me. I was still worked up and needed to cum to take the edge off. I slipped my fingers into my slippery cunt while rubbing my clit with my thumb. In no time I was bucking against my hand. I brought my fingers to my mouth and licked them clean of my juices. I finished my shower, the ache in my lady bits having been dulled to a manageable level.

I had just turned off the water when the bathroom door opened.

"Damn. Looks like I'm too late." Paul stated.

"I don't think so, there is still some water left." I replied.

"That's not quite what I meant." He said slyly, cupping my ass cheek.

"Oh, sorry, but she's still a little sore from last night." I lied.

"Aww, well maybe later then." He replied, sounding a little defeated.

I grinned and wrapped my towel around my wet body.

I dressed in one of my favorite dresses. I knew Paul enjoyed it when I wore it, but would other women like what they saw? If so, I'd probably never know, but the thought of maybe catching the eye of other women excited me.

I applied some light makeup along with a few sprays of my favorite perfume and waited for Paul to get ready. So far, I had resisted checking for any replies to my post, but the longer I waited the more I thought about it. Thankfully, Paul announced that he was ready.

We agreed on where we were going to eat and soon we were seated at a table. My eyes wandered around from table to table, noticing that there were a few very pretty ladies seated nearby. My mind started to drift off thinking about one of these women replying to my post.

"Hello, earth to Steph!"

"Wha...oh, sorry."

I quickly grabbed the menu even though I was pretty sure what I wanted wasn't on there.

"You alright? You were somewhere else there for a good moment."

"Yeah, I'm...I'm good. Just thinking about an issue I had with a client's site build is all." Wow, the lies were flowing like crazy lately.

"Ah, well you'll figure it out. You're great at what you do."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence. What are you going to have?" I tried redirecting the conversation.

Figure it out. Yeah, I'm not sure I was going to be able to figure out what was really troubling me. What was I even thinking? Hooking up with some strange woman I've never met? That just sounds sketchy and asking for something bad to happen. And for what, to possibly get my pussy licked? Yeah, and maybe have my internal organs harvested! Fuck... I needed to get my shit together. This was all starting to sound crazy. As soon as I got home, I was deleting that secret Reddit account.

I took a deep breath and turned my attention to lunch and my husband. We placed our order and chatted while we waited for our food.

After we finished our delicious meal, Paul mentioned that we had to stop by the auto parts store on the way home. My car needed a new air filter and our daughter's car needed a new belt. While he worked on those, I could do a few chores at home and we could have the evening free for a movie.

My mind had been completely free of thoughts of other women until one of the sexy ladies I had eyed earlier walked past. Oh my god! She smelled delicious. I have no idea what scent she was wearing, but it was heavenly. I swear my panties dampened instantly. I wanted it, whatever it was.

I took a moment to compose myself while Paul left money for our bill, plus a tip, on the table. As we made our way out of the restaurant, the sexy, lovely-smelling blonde was standing outside by the entrance with her friend. I had to know what she was wearing.

"Excuse, me." I spoke to her.

"I'm sorry, but you walked past us just a minute ago and I just have to know what perfume you're wearing. It smells amazing!"

"Oh, thank you! It's called Summer Love by Gianna Valentina. It's almost sinful, isn't it?" She smiled slyly then touched my bare shoulder as she giggled.

Her touch made my skin tingle. It wasn't going to be easy to get over these urges.

"I'd say sinful describes it perfectly. Thank you and have a lovely day!"

Her scent had invaded my senses. It was all I could smell. It was such an alluring fragrance; feminine, seductive, intoxicating...it made me feel naughty.

Once we got back home, Paul got to work on the cars, and I went into our bedroom to change and to also take care of something I had to do.

The first thing I did was search for Summer Love perfume. I found it right away. It wasn't cheap, but I didn't care. This was a fun little splurge just for myself. Being offered a discount for being a first-time customer helped take some of the sting out of the cost. After entering all my info, I hit purchase. Now I just had to wait a few days for it to arrive. I felt a little giddy just thinking about it. Then I remembered what other task I needed to complete.

I opened my Reddit app so I could log in to my secret account and delete it for good. I entered my username and password and went to press the settings icon to delete this damn account when I saw it. The envelope icon was lit up. That meant I had a message.

My pulse quickened and my hands began to shake. I told myself to just ignore it, but that would make too much sense. I stared at that little icon for several minutes. I thought I heard a noise and quickly closed the app, only to realize that it was just Beatrice, our cat.

Once I knew it wasn't someone interrupting me, I opened the app back up and pressed the envelope icon. My inbox opened and there sat one lone message. I clicked on the message and it loaded instantly. The message read-

"Hi! I saw your post and it brought a smile to my face. I'm 21 but love and prefer older women and I would love to meet up and have a little fun. I'm not looking for any reciprocation unless you want to. I have some free time throughout the week and on weekends. Let me know a time that works for you. Hope to hear from you soon!"

Oh shit. This was real. There was no way I was going to go through with this though. I'd just ignore the message. She did sound excited though. Maybe I'd just message her back, if it was indeed a her, and let her know that I couldn't do it. Yep, problem solved.

But this was what I wanted. I had thought of this exact moment repeatedly for weeks now. I'd lost sleep over these thoughts, lied to my husband, let them affect my work, and let them consume almost every waking moment of my life. Now that I had this opportunity at my fingertips, was I sure I could go through with it? How would I feel if I let this moment slip away? I lay on my bed contemplating which fork in the road I should follow. Thankfully Paul was still outside dealing with the cars, which gave me time. After thinking through everything, I typed my message back.

"I wasn't expecting to get a response. I've never done anything like this before and I'm...I'm scared. I'm sorry, but I don't think I can do this." was my reply.

I sat waiting for a response, forgetting that this wasn't like texting. After waiting a few more minutes, I closed the app and tried to find something to keep me busy. I watered the flowers and plants, straightened up a few things, gave Beatrice some skritches, and did a few more chores. I had managed to keep myself occupied for a couple of hours and when I realized how much time had passed, I hurriedly checked my Reddit inbox again and found...nothing.

A few minutes later Paul came back in and asked if I was hungry. While I was busy he had finished both cars and even ran them through the car wash. I told him I wasn't, which wasn't a lie, but the reason for my lack of hunger was due to nerves. I'm not sure why I was even nervous, as I had told this other person that I couldn't go through with it.

Paul said he'd just grab some snacks and a cold beer and asked if there was anything I'd like to do. I told him a movie sounded good. It would help pass the time and keep my mind off of the other stuff going on. He agreed that it sounded good and we picked a title from our list we've been wanting to see. We assumed our usual positions on the couch; him on one end and I on the other, with our legs stretched out in the middle. We were about 45 minutes into the movie and I was fully focused on the picture when my phone vibrated. The alert broke my concentration and I took a quick glance at my phone screen. It was a notification from Reddit. I was instantly hit with feelings of nervousness but also a bit of excitement. I knew which account I was signed into, and that gave me an idea of the type of notification it was. I locked my phone and tucked it between my body and the pillow I was resting against. I'd just check it after the movie.