Dreams of My Desire

I rinsed off, drained the tub, and wrapped a towel around my body and one for my hair. I dried myself and applied my favorite lotion to my skin. I walked to the bedroom and took my dress from the closet. I had my special lingerie set out, but I still had a while before I needed to meet my new friend. I walked to the window and peered out upon the city. I was fairly certain that no one could see me and see that I was naked, but it was thrilling to feel so exposed regardless.

I spent more time pacing around the room, trying to settle my nerves. It didn't quite seem real what I was about to do. I thought about everything that had led up to this moment; the dreams, the curiosity, hours spent online, the sneaking...the lies.

As far as Paul knew, I was meeting with a new client. This was a regular occurrence due to the company I worked for having a large list of very big clients. My team built grand websites for some of the biggest companies in the world. But I wasn't here for work. I was here to cheat on my husband, with another woman.

I looked at the clock and noticed that I needed to get ready. I was only a block or so from the university, which would allow us plenty of time together. I slipped into my lacy lingerie, sprayed myself with my new favorite perfume, and put on my dress; blue with white floral print. I stepped into a comfortable pair of sandals, grabbed my phone, purse, and sunglasses, and made my way to the lobby.

I took the first step onto the sidewalk and took a deep breath. This was it. I navigated towards my destination, more ready than ever to finally partake in the experience of making love to another woman.

As I neared the bench I was supposed to meet her at, I noticed a small gathering of students around it. I scanned the group and my eyes honed in on her; yellow tank top, short jean shorts, and a red backpack. She was a redhead, and she looked incredible from this distance.

As I neared, my heart skipped a beat. I should have recognized that fiery mane of red hair anywhere. It was Monica! The same Monica that had been to my home numerous times. Rachel's friend Monica. I immediately turned around and headed back the way I had come from. Holy fucking shit!!! I was panicking and couldn't make my feet move fast enough. What were the odds?! My only hope was that she didn't notice me. I wasn't that close, was I? She had been talking to another girl in that group, so she was probably preoccupied. But we were supposed to meet! Oh shit!

I sped through the hotel lobby and dashed into the elevator. My hands were shaking so badly that I fumbled getting the keycard into the door. Once I was inside, I tossed my belongings onto the table by the door and collapsed onto the bed. When the day started I didn't envision myself face down on this luxurious hotel bed, crying my eyes out. The tears wouldn't stop. I deserved this. This is what cheaters got.

I cried for an hour. I finally calmed down enough to sit up and consider the situation. If anything was ever brought up, I'd just deny it. It was my word against hers. I'd delete that fucking Reddit account, something I should have done the first time, and deny everything. I was at a business meeting in the area. Yep, that's what I was doing. Who knows, maybe she has too much to lose as well?

Now I had this expensive hotel room for nothing. This was supposed to be the setting for a magical, sensual moment for me. I began to cry again. I wanted this so bad. I knew it was never going to happen now. I would go through life unfulfilled, my soul burning for the touch of another woman. Maybe one day I'd look back at this and realize how ridiculous I had been, but right now my heart was broken.

I gathered my things and checked out with the hotel's app on my phone. I exited the elevator in the parking deck and loaded my stuff into my car. When I arrived home, I had the place to myself. I put my belongings away and fell onto the bed. I pulled out my phone and brought up Reddit. It was time to delete that account. I opened the messages and read them one last time. I looked at her picture. There were going to be times that she'd be here with Rachel. They were going to be awkward, at least for me. I thought about sending her one final message, but I decided that I just needed to leave it be.

"Moooooom?" I heard Rachel yell out.

I quickly swiped away the app and sat up on the bed.

"Up here, dear. I'll be out in a second"

I checked myself in the mirror. I looked pretty rough.

I met Rachel in the hallway.

"What's up, mom? You look beat?"

"I am. I had a client meeting today and those things always wear me out."

"Oh, sorry, mom. I didn't mean to wake you from your nap."

"It's ok, I wasn't sleeping. Just trying to relax a bit."

"Ok. I'm going to grab a quick snack and head to work."

"Ok, kiddo. I'll see you later.

"Get some rest, mom."

I must have fallen asleep not long after because I was awoken when I felt Paul tugging the covers over me.

"Rough day?"

"Yeah. New client meeting."

"Hungry?"

"Not too bad, but I could eat."

I could grill some pork chops? Some mashed potatoes and mac & cheese with them?"

"Sure. Sounds good."

"Ok, you want to sleep some more or...?"

"I'd better get up or I'll never sleep tonight."

"Alright. I'll go get started."

I didn't want to move from the bed. I just wanted to lay there and feel miserable. I also didn't want to attract any attention to myself. I wasn't sure if and/or when any potential fallout may occur, but the more normal I acted, the better the chance of my denial being believable. I was going to have to suck it up.

When I walked into the kitchen, Paul had started dinner. I jumped in to help and we conversed about our day, made jokes, and carried on like all seemingly happily married couples do. It wasn't fair to say that I was unhappy, so I'd say unsatisfied was more appropriate. Sex always left me wanting more, but the "more" was never going to happen.

That night, after dinner, I resisted the urge to explore certain topics on my phone. I sat with Paul and watched some shows on television after cleaning up from dinner. I spent some time outside watering flowers and pulling a few weeds in an attempt to distract myself further.

When the clock hit 10:00 pm, I felt my eyes getting heavy and I was having trouble concentrating so I told Paul I was heading up to bed. I stripped off my clothes and slid under the sheets. I unlocked my phone and looked at it for the first time since before dinner. I was a little nervous to see if there was anything I may have missed. I felt more at ease when I saw that there were no notifications from anyone that I may have messaged on a certain secret account. I scrolled through a few news articles before I couldn't keep my eyes open any longer.

It was Thursday, which meant that I had the house to myself most of the day. My usual morning routine of a nice masturbation session didn't hold any appeal to me, so I showered and made some coffee. I really needed to focus on the work I had been neglecting. I wasn't terribly behind, but it could get out of hand quickly if I didn't get going. I tried staying on task, but I caught myself daydreaming about yesterday several times.

I wondered if she'd say anything to Rachel or maybe even Paul? I checked the post history on the account she messaged me from, and there was nothing. I assumed she used it strictly for our conversation. That led me to believe that she was trying to keep this a secret as well, which made me feel better about anyone finding out, if she had even noticed me at all.

The rest of the day went well and the evening was a repeat of the previous one. I snuck off to bed before Paul, trying to head off any potential attempts at him initiating sex. I wasn't in the mood to deal with that yet.

Early in the morning, I woke from a dream. Yes, one of those kinds of dreams. I went to the bathroom and got a drink of water and splashed some cold water on my face. I wet a washcloth and wiped up the mess I had made between my legs. The dream was intense and very erotic, which sent my wetness flowing. I paused before rinsing out the washcloth and brought it to my nose. I inhaled and my scent filled my nose. I wondered how other women smelled when they were aroused. I intended to clean up, cool down, and go back to bed. Instead, I slipped a finger between my folds and then pressed up into my entrance. I fingered myself then brought my dripping finger to my mouth and tasted myself. I moaned softly as the taste hit my tongue.

There was no turning back. I placed one foot up on the chair next to the vanity, giving me better access to my needy slit. I rubbed my clit with one hand, while my other pressed onto the vanity top for support. The stone countertop felt cool and smooth on my skin. The fingers between my legs, coated in my slick nectar, slid effortlessly over my aching nub. I ground my pussy into my fingers as I worked nearer and nearer to my peak. When the back of my hand brushed the corner of the stone vanity, an idea hit me.

I moved forward until my slit rested upon the corner of the vanity. I ground my clit against the cold, hard stone. My slippery wetness glided over the rounded edges of the vanity top. I set into a rhythm and moved as if I was polishing the corner with my little pearl. I soon felt the surge of pleasure begin soaring inside of me. I worked at a steady pace, inching closer and closer until...

"Fuck...oh, fuuuuck!" I softly whimpered. I needed to be quiet, but the sensations erupting in me made it difficult. I rode out my orgasm, slowly coming down from my high. Once I was able to think clearly, I wiped the section of countertop off that I just came on, and cleaned myself up. With that out of the way, hopefully, I could fall back asleep peacefully.

Friday was a more productive day. I got a lot of work squared away and felt more accomplished than I had in a while. Saturday was even better and having Paul around kept me distracted. Rachel invited Nathan over for a movie and pizza night and we stayed up late laughing and having a few drinks. After the movie, Rachel and Nathan went out to meet friends. I left the mess to deal with in the morning and went to bed. I successfully dodged having to have sex again, but I knew I was going to have to give in and satisfy my husband soon. I was starting to feel better about things and was hopeful that I might look forward to sex soon.

I woke up Sunday, showered, dressed, and attended to the mess from the previous night. I was straightening up pillows on the couch when Rachel walked through the front door.

"Hey, mom. Where's dad?" I heard her ask.

"I think he's out in the backyard getting ready to..." I replied as I looked up and met her eyes.

Behind Rachel stood her gorgeous redhead friend.

"Uhm, I think he's uhm, getting ready to...uh, mow. "

"Ok. My car started making a weird sound and felt like something was dragging. Hopefully, he knows what's wrong. We'll go find him." Rachel moved to go find Paul when Monica spoke.

"I'll stay here and talk with your mom. It's been a while since I've seen her."

My eyes moved between my daughter and her friend.

"That's cool. Hopefully, it's nothing and we can be on our way." Rachel said as she moved across the room.

Once the back door shut, I could feel Monica's eyes on me. I had my back to her, nervously fiddling with items on a shelf.

"Hey, Steph! How have you been?" She asked.

"Uhm, good, Monica. Real good."

"That's great!" She replied, walking around from behind the couch to take a seat on the center cushion. I watched her sit then refocused my attention back to the items on the shelf.

"How's school going?" I asked.

"Oh, you know...it can be a little muff, I mean tough, at times."

I definitely caught her little "slip", which caused me to knock off the picture frame I was rearranging. The photo of Paul and me on our wedding day tumbled to the hardwood floor and shattered.

I knelt down to pick up the larger pieces of glass and Monica moved over to help.

"It's ok, I've got it. I don't want you getting cut." I told her.

"Are you ok? You seem nervous?" Monica asked.

"I'm...I'm fine, Monica."

"That's a nice photo of you and Paul. You look happy." She commented.

"Yeah, we were. I mean...we still are...it's just, on that day..." I began to explain.

"I understand. I get it." She replied.

"I uhm, I wonder if they've had any luck with Rachel's car?" I quickly changed the subject.

"Yeah." She said softly.

I glanced up and caught her peeking down my shirt. Her teeth gently bit her lower lip. She looked up quickly and we locked eyes before she averted her gaze back to the broken glass.

"Hey, my cars all good to...uh oh, what happened?" Rachel inquired as she entered the room.

Monica stood and backed away a few steps.

"Oh, I knocked over this frame accidentally." I told her.

"Oh, mom! I'm sorry! I love that photo." Rachel said.

"It'll be ok, sweetie. I'll just get a new frame." I assured her.

"My dad fixed my car! There was a rock stuck against the brake thing. Are you ready to go?" Rachel explained to Monica.

"Yeah, Uhm...let's... let's go." She replied.

"By mom! Love you!" Rachel exclaimed as she hugged me before opening the door.

Monica followed behind her. Before she pulled the door closed, she turned and looked at me. I waved to her and she smiled back and then closed the door.

I felt like I had been holding my breath and deeply inhaled. It was pretty obvious that Monica had indeed noticed me the other day. This was what I had feared and I had no idea where to go from here.

That night I tossed and turned for hours. I'd fall asleep for a little while only to start dreaming about the whole mess of the situation. This repeated all night long.

Once it became obvious that I wasn't going to get any more sleep, I reached over and grabbed my phone from the nightstand. It was still dark outside, but Paul had already left for work, thankfully. I scrolled through posts on various apps like a zombie. As I browsed through random content, the room slowly began to brighten from the rising sun. I had no desire to leave the cozy confines of my bedsheets, and there wasn't anything stopping me from laying here all day. I loved having the freedom to spend all day in bed if I wanted.

After scrolling for hours, I needed to give my eyes a rest. I dropped my phone next to me on the bed and stretched. My hands instinctively came to rest on my chest and I began mindlessly squeezing my tits. As per my usual morning routine, one of my hands made its way down my body and between my legs. My fingers gently stroked through the patch of hair on my mound before I slipped my middle fingers between my folds. I closed my eyes as the sensation filled my body with familiar comfort.

Things were feeling wonderful when thoughts of Monica came flooding in. Almost instantly my stomach began to knot up. I was filled with worry from the uncertainty of what would happen. My mind replayed various scenarios and scenes from the past week. It was at this time that I remembered that I hadn't deleted that damn account! I picked up my phone and opened the app I used to access Reddit. I was logged into my main account so I hurriedly entered the info for my secret account.

I was instantly greeted by 3 new messages. I opened the first one and read it.

"Hi?" Read the first one.

"I was afraid that you'd delete your account. I hope you aren't upset to hear from me?" Was the second.

"Stephanie? Do you want to talk?" Read the last.

The angel on my shoulder was screaming to delete everything.

The devil on the other was telling me to message her back.

I lay in bed as the two opposing forces battled for control. I'd love to say the angel was victorious, but then this story wouldn't be worth telling, would it?

"I'm afraid you've mistakenly messaged the wrong person." I replied

It was only about 10 minutes until I received a response.

"Please don't do this. I'm worried sick over all of this." She sent back. I received another message immediately after.

"If you don't want to talk to me, that's fine. I just want you to know that I won't say anything to anyone. I just ask that you do the same for me. Please?"

Well, that made me feel quite a bit better. Of course, I wouldn't say anything.

"I'm sorry. I'm scared too. You have my word that I won't tell a soul."

I closed out of the app after hitting send and breathed a sigh of relief. Things might still be awkward between us for a while, but I had hoped that our situation would eventually be alright. Maybe I would get out of bed today. Coffee was calling my name and after my night of shitty sleep, I'd probably need several cups.

I took my fresh cup of coffee and stretched out on the couch. After a while, I was feeling the effects of the coffee and decided to try doing some actual work. I hit my stride and was able to make some serious headway on the project. I had worked through lunch and decided to take a break. I was debating if some online retail therapy was in order when there was a knock at the... back door?

I cautiously got up off the couch and made my way into the kitchen. There was a door from the kitchen out into the mud room, and from the mud room, there was a door out onto the back patio and the fenced-in yard. The glass in that door was frosted for privacy but I could see a figure through the glass. I reached for the doorknob on the kitchen door when the person knocked again. I walked into the mud room and up to the door.

"Can I help you?!" I called out.

"Stephanie! Can we talk?" The visitor replied.

I would have almost wished it was a stranger in my backyard. I sighed and opened the door and was greeted by a red-headed beauty.

"Monica? Why are you here and why didn't you come to the front door?" I inquired.

"Because I didn't want to be seen on your doorbell camera." She explained as she entered.

"Rachel and I used to sneak in and out through the back gate, so I thought I'd use that so I wasn't seen." She continued.

I just grinned and shook my head.

"Can I get you some coffee?"

"No thanks. I just uhm, I just want to talk."

"Ok. About what?"

"Steph, c'mon?"

"Ok, ok. Come on in. Let's take this to the couch."

Monica followed me into the front room. I sat in my usual corner and she took the end where Paul usually sits. There was an uncomfortable moment of silence where neither one of us knew what to say or could look at each other. I finally spoke first.

"So...this is all kind of bizarre, would you say?"

"Yeah. I'm kind of shaken up by the whole thing."

"Me too. I wasn't expecting it to end up like this. Paul would kill me if he ever found out what I was up to."

"My parents would too. You know how they are. They are uptight and very much against...well, damn near everything."

"Your parents are paying for your education, aren't they?"

"Yep. If they found out I was...you know, like this. They'd cut off all the money. I'm too close to graduation for that to happen."

"I understand. Trust me, I'm not going to say anything."

"Thank you. When I saw you walking up to the spot we agreed on, I was a bit shocked, but then I saw what you were wearing and I swear my heart stopped."

"You? When I realized it was you, I couldn't get out of there fast enough!"

"I've never had such a scare. I never considered that I'd meet someone I knew.

"Can I ask you a question? Have you done that before? Met someone like that?"

"Uhm, yeah. Five other times."

"Men and women both or...?"

"Fuck...this, this was supposed to happen a lot differently. People weren't supposed to know until I was ready. Until I was done with school."

"Oh...I'm... I'm so sorry. So no one knows?"