First Kiss

The coming dawn woke me and after kissing Rachel, I tiptoed back to my bedroom and went to bed for a few more hours of peaceful sleep. Getting up a little before 10 am, I showered and went downstairs for breakfast to be greeted by my mom who had coffee made and was reading the news on her laptop. "Good morning dear," she said with a smile.

Hi mom, thanks for making coffee," I replied.

"I figured that you could use it today, after the night that you had," she said without her eyes leaving the computer screen.

Momentarily stunned, I responded calmly nonetheless, "Yeah, we got home a little late but not so bad overall. Is Rachel moving around yet?"

"No, not yet. She doesn't have the stamina for late nights that you have," she said quietly.

"As I said, it wasn't that late, even for her," I answered with a smile.

"Yes," was the only thing that was said in reply.

As the last word hung in the air, Rachel drifted into the kitchen like a ghost floating through a dark, crumbling castle; noiseless and still.

"Good morning, precious," said my mother.

"Hi, mom, Chris," came the reply. "Any coffee left?"

"I saved some for you," I responded quietly. "You're up early. Do you have plans?"

"Anne texted me and we're going for a run around the golf course when she gets here in an hour or so," Rachel replied.

"You certainly seem to be getting a lot of exercise lately," came my mother's curt reply while still not looking up from the screen of her laptop.

Like DeNiro in 'Taxi Driver', my sister liked to face things head-on with the "You talkin' to me?" attitude regardless if that specific attitude was appropriate for the situation or not, so she gave her best Sardonic smile and said simply, "Is there a problem, mom? There seems to be a sudden chill in the room."

"No problem, it was only my concern that you're working out and exercising too much and you may hurt yourself in the process," she said. "We wouldn't want that, we all care too much about you."

"I'm fine, Mom, I won't get hurt, don't worry," Rachel replied.

"Are you sure?" came the response while my mother stared directly into Rachel's eyes. She continued, addressing me, although still looking at Rachel, "Chris, maybe you should speak to your sister, so she understands that my concern is for her wellbeing."

I reflected on her words for a minute, ensuring that I understood what was being said and what was not. In my heart and drawing upon my experience of the past week, I knew she was right, even though I did not know the context in which her words were spoken and probably never would.

"Okay," I said, "Rachel, we agreed that we should get together to talk over some things before I return to college so let's do that later today. I have been asked to come back to school earlier than planned and will leave the day after tomorrow assuming I can get a flight, so let's chat today."

"I will look into the flight for you," said my mother, "so don't concern yourself with that."

Rachel stared at me in disbelief. I knew I was lying and she knew I was lying and now she was holding back tears which if allowed to seep out would open floodgates for me as well. "Sounds good," she replied in a hushed tone, "I'll see you later," and walked from the room.

I was getting up from the table when the first tear trickled down my cheek and I hoped it would go unnoticed. "You did the right thing, Chris. You'll both survive, and this is the best path for you," said my mother quietly, and then she touched my hand as I walked from the room.