Invisible String

"Holy shit, Ted, didn't know you could cuck assholes. Substance over form! Haha!" Danielle's wholehearted laughter after showed that sometimes, even I do things to Danielle too.

"You should've told yourself at Radiant, you know... don't be sad, you cucked the jerk who wanted to cuck you!" She continued and laughed again, this time holding her hands over her tummy.

And that's how, just like that she evaporates my worries....

She started Endgame after that. We immersed ourselves in the movie. Spotting the easter eggs and discussing them in-between pausing the movie appropriately. When the legendary Stan Lee said, "Make Love, Not War," we shared a blushing glance. The movie was moving towards the final act. Thanos had destroyed the Avengers facility, post Hulk snapping his fingers to undo Thanos' snap and the decimation. And as the movie further progressed and the portals scene started playing with that music in the background, my renewed hope renewed with a new vigour. And I started crying. Again! Is it why people think of me as the way they do, well people can think all they want, crying is cathartic and I don't mind what people think -- people don't (want to) appreciate context and I couldn't do anything to have them appreciate it.

Danielle noticed the change in my emotional state and when I noticed her noticing me, I clung to her arm without giving the action a second thought, she patted my face straightened my hair out and said, "Talk to me, Ted...."

"This scene is special to me. It's a tangible punctuation of hope for me. Just feels nice sometimes to see hope is not lost, that's it." I said.

She kissed the side of my head and I watched the rest of the movie cuddled up to her. As the movie ended, we discussed about our time travel interpretations and the stuff we usually discuss about.

"You said it felt nice that all hope is not lost, what did you mean by that Ted?" Danielle asked, out of the blue, peering in my soul with her beautiful eyes.

"You know about me Danielle. What kind of person I am: eccentric, awkward and some might even find me mildly obnoxious and patronizing. And my social life or more specifically lack thereof owing to my 'don't-know-what' personality doesn't help the case. I'm emotionally vulnerable -- volatility thereof extends to such levels that you can call me an emotional minefield. I'm a lot of baggage for any relationship or friendship for that matter -- emotional dependence is a heavy price for my companionship and people fine that price too high to pay.

"With me all you have to do is take a leap of faith, take that risk. Risk a commitment. Risk weathering through the awkward exterior. Risk navigating the inner me. If you take those risks, I know I can redefine the definition of family for you. But people do not want to take that risk. It's not that people hate me, but the thing is they don't love me either -- I'm just an acquaintance and nothing more. I mean either hate me or love me don't leave me hanging it's very painful.

"But, Bill, Andrew, Mitchell and Alyssa and all of the time You and Nat: you stepped in that minefield. You did not judge me; did not give me sympathy and left me hanging; you tried to empathize; most importantly took that risk; that leap of faith... what more does a lonely man need other than a small grenade of love and once he gets that he will readily jump on it to be blasted to ecstasy... you and Nat especially, redefined my life and gave my existence a purpose..." I opened my heart and when I realized how strong I came across, only then did I stop, hoping I did not scare Danielle away.

"Redefined your life and gave your existence a purpose, how?" Danielle asked what I dreaded she'd asked when I abruptly stopped.

"I mean by taking that risk and giving me that opportunity to become family..." I said trying to circumvent the question.

"So, you're like my little brother then?"

She had me by the balls now. There was no point in circumventing or trying to escape the question. How much slow is too slow, this much slow is too slow... I already opened up quite a bit and now was the time to open up completely, with subtlety of course.

"And this little brother loves you with the every fibre of his existence..." There I said it and I could sense her breathing change.

"And what if you aren't... aren't my little brother...."

"It doesn't change a thing. This Jorah loves you Khaleesi...."

"You know Jorah dies in that story...."

"And even I'll die for you and for Nat, if it should come to that...." Corny? Yes, but it is the absolute truth.

"Oh, Teddy...."

Danielle -- her eyes welled up -- she placed her palm on my cheek and leaned in. I closed my eyes and our lips entwined themselves in a passionate embrace. It was a rather chaste kiss, but the intensity of the pent-up feelings and the underlying passion elevated that kiss to an ethereal level. The concepts of space and time froze for me then and there, and my very existence was luxuriating in the warmth of Danielle's embrace. This was the reconciliation my conflicting feelings long desired. The experience was divinely cathartic for me. The sanctity of that consecrated moment is something I wouldn't be able to ever describe.

"That was..." Danielle said, her forehead still resting against mine. Being that close I could feel her smile, despite my eyes being closed.

"Late..."

"Damn right!" As soon as Danielle said that, we both shared a knowing warm laugh.

Now it was me who was holding her. Her back was against my chest and she was half way into my lap with my arms enveloping her waist and my chin resting on her shoulder.

"How long?" Danielle asked after a few moments of silence.

"I was besotted with you after listening to you in the brainstorming session before the pitch to Z. From then on, it's been steadily rising -- the rise proportional to me falling in love. And I could feel the pace compound itself post the relocation.

"It's you and Nat, at the centre of my heart and the centre of my existence. You two occupy my heart, give me a will to live, give me something to live for -- you've redefined my life and give my existence a purpose." I finally answered Danielle's original question.

"But I was afraid. I didn't want to mess this amazing thing up. I've been known to. My mind conceived some issues-" I continued before she took over.

"What issues? Do you mean the age difference between us or being Nat's father? Because to me age is a relative concept and even if we would've bonded a tenth of what we do, it would be no concern to me at all. And seeing you and Nat, I don't think that is an issue at all... so what issues remain, huh?"

"Nope. Age was never an issue. I feel in a relationship where just age is the issue, then age shouldn't be an issue at all. And Nat, she isn't the problem, never was, she, in fact, is the solution. But the issue I'm referring to was about me being not good enough for you -- all the past mistakes and all the insecurities rushing and clouding my mind. Not wanting to screw the present for a future which a part of my mind made me believe I'm not qualified enough to handle... loving someone so much that you start thinking that they deserve much better than you... and somewhere I figured this is just going to be a one-sided thing while simultaneously letting the hope of being together with you grow... the complexity of these conflicting emotions -- I just can't describe... but now I know it feels right, it just does. Hope, faith, devotion and love -- all I needed was a push... and all I now need to know is whether you'll have me? I can live just with the memories if you don't, but something inside me says you will... will you?"

"You kidding? Of course, I will silly. Working with you I knew all I needed to know about you. All the material things that mattered. Working with you helped me look past that exterior of yours -- made me realise how genuine and innocent you are. Those talks we had at that Italian place and on that rooftop bar, drew me to you -- showed me there's more to you. And with Nat bonding with you the way she did, no one ever stood a chance. But yeah, it was after my birthday that I could at least organize my feelings, it was after your relocation that these feelings went into overdrive. It was deliciously frustrating to wait for you to talk with me. I realized there is something here, sometimes you just know, Ted...."

And this is how it feels when hope pays-off the investment of your faith... I just held her....

"Danielle..." I said.

"What?"

"Danielle..."

"What?" She shoved an arm playfully at my ribs.

"Nothing, I just like saying your name..."

There was again a small silent passage of time where we just communicated in a language which you cannot ever put into words.

"I love you, Theodore...."

"I love you, Danielle, more than words can ever express... more than hearts can ever feel..." I said feeling my eyes tearing up.

"So now what, you wanna take it slow?" Danielle quipped.

"Fuck slow!"

"You wanna fuck slow!"

"Oh you..." I said and swiftly turned her so that she was straddling me, and our faces were almost touching.

We instantaneously leaned in and this time this kiss was electric, with unbridled passion and generating sparks. The ensuing hot dance of our tongues added fuel to those sparks. As we made out, the fire turned into a conflagration.

Danielle wrapped herself around me as we felt each other's body in the most intimate manner. Most intimate, not yet, but very near to that nonetheless....

We made the way to her bedroom, Danielle still wrapped around me and nibbling at my neck and marking me. Once there, we graciously relieved ourselves of our clothing -- not without the due share of excited and cute fumbling. We took turns in showering every inch of each other's body with sensuous kisses. I paid extra attention to her breasts and those taut nipples eliciting pleasurable sighs from her. As I continued my journey southwards to worship this goddess, I was stopped from my pursuits. Danielle then proceeded to get me off using her mouth expertly -- getting the first one out of the way is always a great idea! I worked my way to her sacred entrance, as I then proceeded to get her off using my mouth expertly and my body through my tongue experienced the most beautiful female orgasm firsthand.

I was, in no time back at full mast. We shared a knowing glance, a smile and I entered her consummating our union, with our eyes locked on each other communicating things which can never be described but only felt. We made tender, sweet, slow and passionate love -- our bodies rewarding us for the excruciating wait -- the pleasure only compounded by our profound feelings for each other. In that heightened state of arousal, I could feel the beginnings of the most powerful orgasm I had ever experienced until then. As the wave of pleasure took over my body, I came inside her, which triggered her orgasm. The wave of pleasure from my body seemed to wash over her with more force as I could feel her convulse on me and writhe in pleasure beneath me.

After recovering from those orgasmic highs, we cuddled in a tighter embrace luxuriating in the post-coital bliss. Through our beautifully sweaty bodies wrapped around each other, we could feel the heartbeat of the other. We could feel the other breathe. Our eyes met and no words were spoken for a long time. Danielle played with the hair on my chest as I gently massaged her scalp and played with her hair.

"You're a natural lover, Ted. Your body beautifully expresses what's in your heart." Danielle said breaking our shared reverie.

"The sheath of a goddess like you deserves an enchanted sword like Excalibur, not a kitchen knife..." I didn't know what I'd done to deserve such high praise and replied in my patented corny, but true-to-every-letter fashion.

"For me it's about the wielder, Ted, more than the weapon. And you are hell of a wielder. You make my body feel things my brain says it shouldn't."

I just held her -- even tighter now.

I repeat, this is how it feels when hope pays-off the investment of your faith....

The number of times Danielle and I had lunch and dinner together had lost count. But to me we had been on two 'dates' -- I liked to call those that. First being the lunch at Italian place when I slept on the couch of her hotel room; the day when I said burgundy and maroon make the best combination. Second being on the rooftop bar during our Z audit completion dinner party. Those two dates had something special about them. I consider this as a third date and as destiny had it, we consummated on our third date. The conflagration of our respective separate bodies was put out by the conflagration of our united bodies, in a poetic fashion....

We fell asleep in each other's embrace -- the way it was always meant to be.

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Not willing to leave my lover, I stayed Saturday morning. We went shopping and got me some much-needed clothes and stuff.

I feel lovers fresh of a sexual congress, radiate a certain glow which you can't hide. And that Saturday, despite our collective attempts to hide that vibe that glow, funny looks were exchanged between Mitchell and Alyssa. At some point Alyssa dragged off Danielle to the kitchen. And Mitchell, Nat and I hung out. It felt family.

You don't hide secrets from family. And we didn't. Mitchell and Alyssa readily accepted me and left me all teared up. Nat jumped in my arms and painted my face in a flurry of loud kisses as I told her how much I loved her and her Mom.

It felt family....

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Danielle and I were very discreet at work about our relationship. But love speaks and you can hear it pretty clearly. There were murmurs on the floor -- rumours, ripe grapevine and that stuff. Danielle assured me she isn't new to all these things and that she can effectively take care of it, but it pained me to be the cause of all this.

Accounting environment is always buzzing with new updates. Timing of this particular one couldn't be righter. A new accounting standard was issued, a complex one at that. But we were ready for its implementation right from the time they'd dropped its exposure draft months ago. Due to Danielle's expert mentorship, I found myself at consummate ease with this standard whose implementation was mandatory for many businesses.

I found such a business and was readily offered a junior management position in the finance department considering my experience, credentials and references.

Bill had a relatively long conversation (by his standards) with me on my last day. He bade me a warm farewell and asked me to take care of myself and take care of Danielle.

Shortly after I started my new job, I moved in with Danielle. Our love making, the day I moved in, was more of fucked-the-brains-out kind while retaining its love making characteristics. Whenever we made love, I felt as if a new life was infused in me -- my body was aging, and Danielle's body was the fountain of everlasting youth. My new job allowed me more time with Nat, who sort of, was becoming a magician with numbers and letters and combination thereof.

Six months after moving in Danielle and I were married. Nat calling me Dad is placed immediately after Danielle confessing her love for me that Endgame movie night, in the list of greatest moments in my life. Every day with these goddesses is an addition to that list.

Love stitched me together by tearing me apart.

Now looking back at it all, with my wife and my daughter in my arms, I can just sing:

"Time, mystical time

Cuttin' me open, then healin' me fine

Were there clues I didn't see?

And isn't it just so pretty to think

All along there was some

Invisible string

Tying you to me"

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