All Comments on 'Lauren approaching heaven'

Of course! Why does some people think it's smart to write stupid stories?

Erotic and arousing like a can of used oil.

Not for me.

Just stop here, your first story is Bad, with poor writing. Sorry but not everyone can write décent story

If she’s in love with Brandon, why marry Luke? She doesn’t love him, she’s not emotionally invested in him so why marry him?

I’m asking an honest question. Why marry a person you’re not attracted to? At the very least, she could marry a wealthy man or just be a single mom.

It’s hard to cuckold or prove your superiority when the woman is marrying a person she barely tolerates and that she has to lie to 24/7. That would be a miserable marriage. For everyone involved.

Maybe heaven feels like that but stupid looks like this

Proof reading would have made the story more readable .

This is the epitome what a post-pubescent fantasy must consist of. The degree of narcissism that went into writing this is just astonishing. The story is essentially one huge cliché. The character of Lauren (as well as the rest of the female characters) is a weak minded twit, incapable of self control or as it seems, loyalty. A woman in reality who acts as she does, could never have actually loved the poor sap she was engaged to. If this character had even a modicum of decency or empathy, she would have ended her engagement. Then there's the dialog and personal interactions between Lauren's raging hormones and the "alpha" wanna be.

"...I like your outfit. I like how your tits jiggle in it.", Brandon opened up the conversation and casually moved his right hand inside Lauren's cleavage to play with her tits as if this was the most normal thing in the world. "Thank you, sir. I bought it just for you.", Lauren replied with a wink..." — What the heck? The walking sexual harassment lawsuit just starts talking about liking how a woman's "tits jiggle" then reaches inside her clothes to play with her breasts? Talk about a "Me too!" moment!

Then this ridiculous banter over Lauren's clothing.

"Just for me? Your fiancé has never seen you in it?"

"Never, no. I just got it yesterday."

"Really? It's quite... inviting. Why have you chosen this outfit, Lauren?"

"I thought it was the appropriate attire for meeting a man as important and wealthy as you."

"Correct, good girl.", Brandon said while caressing Lauren's chin. — I can just hear Brandon in the bathroom staring in the mirror at himself...'I'm such a manly stud man! I'm so proud of myself. I'm the best man that's ever lived! All the women love me, I'm too good looking for the world! I am the ultimate, dominant, superior, penultimate, maestro of love! I'm so good I worship myself!'

This was pure drivel. 1

4seasonsinternational's bio says, "I just like to write." The real question will be, "Do the readers of LW like to read what you've written?" After seeing this first effort? Not so much. 😖

You sick fuck. Another man hating feminist driven fucked up story. Truly pathetic for a first time "story" 1☆

And yes, he had to have a huge dick.

Dull, predictable.

Yuk!

Well, it looks like another tr@ll sleazed into the group.

Where are the Fetish and Cuck tags ? It's a regular thing in this Cucking Wives category.

Another mislabeled story...not even a LW,as they are not married..and probably once fiancee finds out his woman is a corporate whore...

DOL

Crap unless there is some revenge from the husbands

Ok where is part 2 were Luke get revenge? A good beating is absolutely necessary here,and dump the bitch

Just another slut wife and an arrogant big dick boss, how original...

Just plain crap 1 because can't go any lower

????????????? What was this supposed to be? 1* You really fucked up your first story.

Enjoyed it

fucking the boss, yes. Enjoying it, and being the slut, yes. However, the humiliation and disrespect toward the fiance' by the asshole took this story from a 4-5 to a 2

That’s another item ticked off your bucket list, had a story posted in Lit. Now move on to skydiving without a Shute.

This guy sounds like he is twice the man Wilt was? Not likely...

There is no dominance if the husbands don’t know. This sounds like it’s written by a cuck wannabe in his mom’s basement.

STUPID

Luke isn't even a character. Doesn't the conflict arise from the cuck struggling to come to grips with a new reality? You could have blah blah ed thru the big cock sex and implied it, while changing the focus to how she dealt with Luke at home and got him to agree to be a part of any of this shit. Even the process of why they even got married would have developed the characters more and helped us see what would have given her a reason to destroy her husband (we assume they finally married after 3.5 years). How he reacts to her pregnancy is the real story. Being a professional whore is boring.

1.5 stars. Extra .5 for keeping it short, and easy to skim.

Are you obsessed with a dominant male ?? This was pure garbage. Minus 2 stars.

Yawn! Nothing original or thought provoking about this one. Just another greasy boss who abuses the trash he hires.

What is the point of this story? It shouldn't be in the Loving Wives section, although I'm not certain where it belongs. Since the story is completely unbelievable, as any billionaire who lived such a libertine lifestyle would be besieged by lawsuits. We must assume it's been written as a fantasy. I could see where some women might see it as a fantasy, but certainly no man would.

Thanks everyone for the feedback so far, I am sorry if you didn't like the story.

If I ever write another one, I'll make sure to be more careful regarding the tag and maybe proofreading it a second time. English is not my first language so if any of you have honest feedback about the style of writing, it is much-appreciated.

Regarding the content, I thought it is clear that this is a fictional story and that the actions of the characters in it are not representative for the real life behavior of men or especially women in general. I just find that piece of fiction hot, if you think otherwise, that's of course up to you. If anyone thinks that people really act or think like that, then I can't help them.

So any constructive feedback that is not basically "please never press a key on a keyboard again" is more than welcome. Thanks to those who gave feedback so far. Have a nice day, everyone.

Fiance takes the money sure earned manages to get in touch with thr billionair partner in business or rival. Uses the schedule provided from the girl and 1 sniper shot later and publicity event and her life is ruined and everyone is free. And if you screwing someone who's attached unlike them you know she's fucking another dude kinda of makes them a knowing cuck.

lc69hunter said about 13 hours ago ---

"... However, the humiliation and disrespect toward the fiance' by the asshole took this story from a 4-5 to a 2"

I am somewhat bemused. I actually agree with part of 69's comments! Their disrespect and humiliation serves only to highlight what a truly crappy pair of mouth breathers Lauren and Brandon are. If a woman is going to cheat on her fiance and then husband, she would do well to be as respectful to him as she can be. Sort of like the military equivalent of respecting the uniform and rank even if the guy wearing is an absolute douchebag. And any guy banging the woman of another man should not crow so loud. Some men don't give a shit about going to jail or about cutting off the unnecessary extra bag of skin on the dipshit who's overstepped his range.

If Brandon and Luke were in a room together who's to say which one would walk out and which would have to be scraped off the walls and floor? No doubt the writer will side with his self proclaimed alpha-champion Brandon. As a reader, my money is on Cool Hand Luke!

Just more waste in the vast and ever expanding wasteland called Loving Wives. 1

If humiliation is your thing a bunch of non loving wives. And was the main slut evan married.

Beyond stupid.

Cheating cunt will never see heaven. Maybe Luke will grow a set, buy a Barrett .50 cal rifle and go asshole hunting. Let’s go Brandon.

Lol, this fetishisation of billionaires who are in reality almost all old, married to unappealing women, gay or pedos. It's so funny, but not as much as their desperate need to cosplay the 'alpha male'.

As for dooming someone to bring up anothers child, that'll be the pay raise.

At some point in time poor old Brandon will realise he's spent his life with whore's because no decent woman could love him for anything other than his money.

Yeah, salty, but the truth none the less.