All Comments on 'Mary's 20 Labors Pt. 08'

20 is a lot and a worthy challenge. However your leading man is fading. Not sexually, or even as a likable character, those traits are still very strong. It’s just his bluster about being a tough guy, man in charge type is getting silly. Especially when, he’s just a beta bear who doesn’t know how to handle falling in love for the first time. Especially at an old age. I appreciate that Mary plays up to him and his ego, he needs this, like the woman bartender told him. But somewhere down the pike, one labor will be marriage, and hopefully before another labor is her changing his depends.

Looking forward to see what else you got.

I truly enjoy the story line. The only suggestion I have is to intermittently play up the women's age. I am thinking Mary is late 40s. I really enjoy older females and by older I mean 40s, 50s, and even some 60 year olds. Yes, I'm an older man but even in college I enjoyed 40 year old women. I enjoy this well written story.

great story,maybe a bbc would do mary