All Comments on 'Pairs of Pumpkins #07: A Half-Baker's Dozen'

After everything we've been through, it's refreshing to see an interlude that's (mostly) just happy sex. Given the creeps we've met thus far, Booker's a welcome change of pace—chads go to bat first, but nice guys -finish- last. ;)

Aside from those ever-pesky commas, my only complaint is I wasn't always clear how everyone was positioned during the threesome.

Thank you! The story needed a positive, male role model, The new Autocrit seems to be better at finding my comma problems and I'm pretty sure the rules have changed since I learned to write. I'm trying to get better at paining the scene and where everyone is. I just fixed something similar in the story I'm editing this morning.