All Comments on 'Splashdown Ch. 03'

Whole lotta rehashing going on.

Best to just skim the story.

Huston I have a bad feeling

I think he was going to give her a Hall Pass for the duration of the flight. And I don't think she realised it.

Well, I'm done. I can't go through eight more pages of wifey falling short three/four times page with three Rooskies in a tin can.

Intense and tragic. Not sure what love means to her. And does she realize that all her decisions are pointing in the direction he forecast means she is what he is afraid she is?

It isn't often I feel like I'm piggybacking on the intimate thoughts of the characters in a story. It feels like that here. I'm anxiously awaiting the coming chapters to see how the story progresses and ends.

I've seen a few minor errors, but they don't detract from the story for me.

Thank you!

The 1st 3 pages is nothing but the same argument being rehashed paragraph after paragraph after paragraph. 1st by Peggy than by Gary then the same arguments on Chapter one and the same arguments on chapter two.

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But what clearly makes this the worst story of the year so far in the living wide categoris the fact that despite the authors considerable talent he has a tendency to make the husband into these amazingly perfect human beings that always manage to forgive lend love everything and everybody no matter how. Bad that hurt..

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Quite frankly it's Ridiculous end it's Exhausting.

It's absolutely unbelievable, that a core of a conflict between two intelligent adult people with a rare professions, demanding high iq, is whether or not one of them can last 9 months without having sex. What kind of a cave some of these authors live in?

Well written, but much too wordy. Just going over the same ground every time. Hardly moved the story on at all.

Its really long and some boring , make it less longueur especially in space

More eight chapters of this story that should have ended last chapter? After all that happened last chapter how could this have 9 more long chapters of bullshit talking? Will she die in space at least? This isn't a story but a punishment for those brave enough to read it!

Let’s see: Peggy meets Viktor or Sergei and over time falls for one or both. Probably both. Meanwhile, down below, Kathy tries to comfort Gary, and instead falls for him. Gary remains confused. Everybody spills their secrets. What to do? What to do? Several chapters of What to do? The Space Station has mechanical problems? One of her Russian lovers dies? Peggy, being total self indulgent, blames Gary, and they engage in the worlds first earth to space marital shouting match. NASA decides they CAN afford a rocket to fetch Peggy out of the space program. She returns to earth a month early and three months pregnant. Oops! Gary, being completely devoted to Peggy, agrees or take her back and raise this obviously half Russian unborn child. Gary continues confused. Until the fetus aborts at seven months with a faulty heart. Cosmic Radiation! Fourteen months after splashdown, Peggy answers the doorbell and is shocked to find Sergei with a dozen roses and s shit eating grin on his face. What to do? What to do? Will Gary kill Sergei? Will Peggy fall again? Will Kathy kill Peggy? Will Gary remain eternally confused? The answers to these hugely important questions are found in chapters 12 through 29.

if she is so lefkish centre - oriented than how can she stay faifull to him during next 6 months - based on this character no way ... looking for next part

What an idiot Gary is. You love her boo hoo!

You’ll do anything for her? Boo hoo!!!

Well you sure did, you just wrapped up your manhood, and threw it in the trash. You let your wife treat you like a piece of shit on her foot, let her fuck over your job and your own life, and for what???

To make her feel good.

Give me a break author

You should get Gary to go out, get a pistol and blow his wimp brains out.

That would be a fitting end for this overbaked claptrap.

Scores 1/5 for just being a plain awful story.

The modern woman. Narcissistic, psychopathic and utterly selfish. Peggy should stay on that rocket until she gets to Uranus. In reality her head is so far up her own arse its like her second home.

Gary, grow a set. She's gone. She won't be back and if she is it will be a shell of a relationship. You've proven to her that you'll roll over for absolutely anything and she will take advantage of that.

Interesting to see where this ends up. Space Cucks?

you know this story started out ok, long with about a thousand words to many but hell now it is just stupid. Mr spy man is just another big cuck. I'm not going to even finish it and am sorry I even started it. Waste of time

Congratulations...you have created in Peggy a character that eclipses Linda in February Sucks. Linda was merely a sociopathic narcissistic slut housewife who betrayed her husband for one night of strange with a superman football player. One and done... Peggy is an astronaut who literally throws her husband under the bus for her dream roller coaster ride in space...a ride that is shaping up to be aménage à trois with 3 Russian cosmonauts that will last 6 months. In this chapter we see that she is a classic sociopath...revealed by her decisions way before the drugs stripped away her veneer to clearly reveal the cold calculating Ms Spock that resides at her core. As a sociopath...she an amoral monster who cannot love by definition. She has and continues to use everyone around her as walking tools to satisfy her own momentary emotional impulses. She "loved" Gary because he satisfied her unbridled sexual passion. Her "love" is demonstrably revealed as lust... He has been replaced by her career. He and their illusionary marriage are dead.

The real revelation in this chapter is just how willing Gary is to assume the role of willing cuckold to gratify the vapid memories of his failed marriage. He has literally crucified himself...career, intimacy, reputation, the works for a sociopathic bitch who demonstrably couldn't care less. Peggy moves to the role of secondary character in this episode... The real focus is upon how Gary deals with resetting his life, masculinity, trust, and optimism in his life. He is faced with a total restart from a betrayal by his sociopath wife in every single facet of their relationship, Frankly, I find the author's work with Gary very disturbing and frankly disgusting.. I am not a fan of willing cuckoldry and I find his self immolation in the face of her insensitive abandonment hard to swallow. There simplyt is no way the author can rationalize the self debasement of this degree of a male character who is a mission planner and masculine role model.

Here we are at the third installment of 10 and I find that the extraordinarily wordy character of this rather simple tale to be hard to take... 7 more installments of this psychobabble is say over the top. PLEASE get a decent content editor in future works. This frankly looks to be about 2 to 3 installments worth of content with 7 installments of psychobabble fluff.

3 stars

He should be banging Kathy like a drum.

Jesus Christ. 3 chapters in and she's still apologizing AND on Earth? This story could not be slower. So much filler, no real insight or resolution.

Too long winded.

Nice to finally have a chapter where Peg had actual thoughts and communicated in complete, comprehensible sentences.

The blubbering, stuttering version of her we saw in the first two chapters was painful. For a woman who's obviously intelligent, dedicated and courageous based on her profession it was hard to see her as a woman who just stared at the floor and only uttered partial sentences. Even though it was easy to understand why she did.

Of course this version of her didn't really improve my impression of her because she was still so completely self centered and oblivious to what Gary was saying and feeling.

The author has put Peg into a situation that even if she doesn't physically cheat during her 6 months in space I'm not sure what she can possibly do to save the marriage when she returns home.

Blah….Blah….Blah, this is like a Discovery channel show 10 minutes of information and takes a hour. This could have been a 1 page. It only got interesting the last 10 paragraphs.

Just went through another marriage counseling session here in Chapter 3. It’s just as onerous as the ones I went through in real life. I’ll say about this regarding Peggy as I said to my ex and our “counselor” who stuck her jaws of death into our marriage and hit the button……

Words are useless, the only thing worth regarding are actions.

Well crafted if a tad (?) repetitive - ok more than a tad. Repeated descriptions of each character’s inner thoughts gets old when it no longer supports the story line. 5* for the first two parts; 3* for this one that added next to nothing.

12 pages so far of the same argument over and over again with no real movement forward in the story. Also switching narration from 3rd person to 1st person is never a good idea.

Very labored and not exactly erotic!

that marriage is in trouble. watch her come back pregnant

This tale has been pathetic from the "get go" and has managed to become increasingly pathetic. Author, if you are trying to demonstrate what a "great" author you are--well you are failing! At this point I'll await the final posting to read any more as I fully expect it to validate my belief that this author will make Gary a weak spine cuckold He will likely ended up supporting a kid from the slut who does know which of the three Russians is the father! Go ahead and delete this, author. The truth hurts.

Well written interesting story line but terrible pacing and far far far too slow

Hmm. Have you already left for Baikonur and started the mission? There are still so many announced parts before the final. I thought that even before the flight, some seducer from the mission management or from the medical staff should have appeared who would want to use a married pussy, guaranteed without the threat of getting pregnant. Perhaps the lover will even pick up some drugs that, in combination with contraceptive injections, will volcanically increase her lust and sensitivity for a limited time of their dates. And experiencing such an inexplicable attraction to another man and indifference to her husband, she will also begin to doubt her love for her spouse and the need to stay married. And the emerging rapprochement between Gary and Katie, apparently, will not pass just like that either.

Why is he now giving her carte blanche to make him a cuckold? I don't understand your story anymore. She has clear priorities that she sets over him and he watches and admits that even if she is cheating on him, he still stands by her.

How would you describe a cuckold better? And don't come at me with love! Lovers don't put their own goals ahead of their partner's goals.

She STILL doesn’t get it! In that overlong conversation with Kathy — where Kathy laid it on thick about how it was HER narcissistic behavior that has impacted Gary — miss Peggy just REFUSED to accept that it was her actions that were revealing her inner self. Which was ugly.

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Kind of surprised that you didn’t have Gary going after the NASA assholes for depriving HIM of information he was entitled to about Peggy’s situation. In fact…4 months go by in this chapter and…nothing.

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Another thing…were are the Russians? Already up there? If not, shouldn’t they be around getting ready too? And if already up there…Peggy is flying alone? Not believable. You’ve dropped the ball here.

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3 ***

I don't know why he sticks with her. I used to love fiercely like he did. But selfish people rarely change. And she's been 90% selfish. I won't cast yer into a lake of fire. She's not completely selfish. And there's nothing evil about that. But should a selfish person like her have a meaningful marriage? I don't think so. Using people isn't great. But using a spouse or a child is just wrong. I'm not him nor the author, but life experience had hmtaught me the hard way that loving someone like her isn't noble. Its enabling

Never could I have imagined that I would find myself longing for a 750 word story......

God I hope he gets with Kathy while she's gone. And presents his wife with the fact they're a couple on her return.

I thought the story picked up steam a bit. Still, A LOT A LOT A LOT of saying the same thing, over and over again. We get it, she sold her husband out and that she THINKS it's terrible. She doesn't actually FEEL it, but she thinks it.

And, god bless him, he is a lovely human being in a gendre-reversed role. And he still seems masculine.

Good job so far...

to much going over stuff already told

boring , get on with it

More of the same rambling. Just get to the story without all the nonsense. Probably only read about 33% since it was all the same subject matter...just in different words. I'm done with story until the last chapter...what 8 more chapters left?

Do you get a chubby the more you write?

Your tale/series has all of the elements to be an Outstanding Read ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐. However, you are building a book with what I call 500 pages of redundant thoughts and emotions. It could be just my anal retentiveness.

I am enjoying the storyline and the development of your characters to me are good. I am not one to judge the grammar or writing. I feel yours is very well done and it has an easy flow for a poor reader such as myself. To me you have taken the readers like me into your publishing considerations by making each of the series a 4 page limit. Thank you for that. It makes it easier to consume and digest the tales for me.

One thing I feel about your tale is the ability to put into context the true subversion that happens everyday in the world among nations. It is not lost on me the fact you are using NASA as a primary means to tell yours. Understanding that NASA is the reason that China and Russia have Hypersonic vehicles capable of being used in combat is a testament to the unclassified sharing of information by politicians and scientist who have no clue how the real world works outside their theoretical realms.

Your tale being set in the previous world of space flight where the Russian space vehicles where the only method to reach the space station is a good touch. Those of us who have seen the dragon and other commercial space vehicles evolve are glad that it is no longer a one vendor show.

While I am not sure I can last for all of the remaining chapters, I do believe your series will be a complete vision with thoughtful results. To me it is a Good Read ⭐⭐⭐ worthy of the rating I gave it.

Keep Writing

JH4Fun

I'm out. This was basically 4 pages of nothing.

Again I think this has a great deal of potential but just not written as I would prefer. I think there is far too much recap and hashing over the same stuff. Too much hinting about some espionage and way too much time spent on her taking that drug to reduce sex drive.

What I think I lost in all of these words and repetition is the ability to cheat and want to have sex with Russians if she is so drugged up she doesn't and can't function with her husband. Why would she all of a sudden turn slut in space? Did I miss where she would no longer taketh drug and it wears off? I had been thinking she was some part of a sex in space experiment but then you have her a numb zombie that can't perform. So my head was at will she be raped?

As for her husband, either shut up and wait for her eventual return or leave and divorce. If he thinks this is all some evil game go to the media and tell them what is going on. They would have a field day with how NASA is destroying a family.

I really like the emotional developments and grappling with difficult decisions. One specific comment I have, so much talk, so little doing. Gary and Peg have a conversation then Peg and Kathy have a conversation that covers the same ground, then there is an internal monologue that recaps the same points. I think much of this so far is overly repetitive.

Chop, sometimes words can be our friend and sometimes they can be our enemy. Each chapter so far has been around 14,000 words, the problem is that every time you repeat your self , it starts to seem that all you were looking for was a word count just to cuck this guy. I feel that your rocket is starting to blow up, not take off. When I start to have to start skimming the pity party again and again, I wonder if I want to finish the ride. There is nothing worse than a 70,000 word cuck story.

I gave up. It's 50-50 that I'll read going forward. I skipped vast paragraphs of the same type of ground covered previously...every consideration. It was like there was a checklist of issues. First Gary expresses, then you hear them repeated with the one sided Kathy to Peg call, then the Kathy to Peg 1:1 conversation then Peg summarizing her thoughts on the same items when Gary comes back. I'm intrigued by the story and appreciate the effort however it's a rough read for me reviewing the same thing over and over. Yes, this is how it is in real life (I went through a senseless but purposeful divorce years ago and things come up in my mind years later just as they had then), but I don't believe it makes a good story to go through it so much.

Waaay too much conflicting emotions and the results are confusing characters and confused readers. There’s no need to keep explaining the same thoughts and emotions repeatedly even if through different characters’ eyes. Simplify what you want to say to advance your overall story arc, then move on. Rounding up to 4*.

Extremely compelling story but STOP with the monologues.

I have come to the conclusion that Gary has a mental illness. Peg has done nothing to the degree that she thinks she has. And for an Astronaut, she doesn’t seam to be very smart with some of the dumb things she says and does.

As a couple there are many ways to get over her dryness and interesting she is not numbed to loving him just numbed to sex, yet the story makes it out like she is also numbed to loving him. This is a contradiction that is ruining the story.

This is a broken relationship and was broken long before she made any of these decisions.

Gary, just get over yourself and love your wife. Quit thinking of yourself so high and mighty. Seems like you have to be the hero every time and therefore put your wife down every time.

I have enjoyed this story thus far, and I'm looking forward to more chapters. I have also been reading other's comments about the story and I think as time goes on, I understand them more. You have taken this story to a much more in depth look at the underlying emotions and expressions of the characters than is typical on this site. While I do feel that it adds to the story in part, I think it can also distract with the deep, in depth analysis.

For this reason, I have given this chapter 4 stars, but I am also still looking forward to the remaining chapters.

1 star - this story has devolved into just another sick cuck/SLUT crap story where NASA is the ASSHOLE. If the author of this crap believes that a man who works for the USA government in a 3 letter agency, is this much of a whining wimp - it is no wonder the rest of the world believes your whole country is slowly falling into the next huge hole of despair and tragedy.

No need for me to try to get through any more of this drivel.

I am already down to the first and last paragraph of the chapter.

Maybe your next story might be a bit more engaging - especially if you find a few people to edit, BEFORE you post any more chapters or stories.

I continue to be riveted to this story. I felt there was a bit too much of a time lapse between Peggy witnessing Gary's emotional display and being counseled by Kathy, and the remainder of the chapter. It would have been better for a bit of dialogue between Peggy and Gary when he decided to return home. Since there are eight more parts of this story to be published I assume much more that involves intrigue will occur once Peggy is in Space. I hope the story line stays in the believable but I think it just might get out there a bit too far. After all the obvious is that Peggy gets pregnant in space and has to come back to Gary with a little Russian in her belly. However for so much more to be uncovered I fear that international espionage is what will transpire eventually. Anyway nice continuation of an interesting story through chapter 3.

I am enjoying the story and would like to share a few things.

1. The drama is well laid out. I can empathize with Gary and Peggy. That said, it’s getting to the point of too much. Misunderstandings, poor communication, unintended consequences, and hurtful actions are all things that are important in a good story so long as they aren’t overused.

2. I think it’s established now that there are outside forces involved in this. I’m not sure who is involved or what the ultimate goal is though. Is this something about Gary and his job? About Peggy? About specifics in the upcoming mission? Is it personal? Is someone using the situation to enact some plan and Greg and Peggy collateral damage?

3. I know the story is complete, but I’m curious @Choppedliver if the questions I have are what you want me to have at this point in the story. Is that something you consider when deciding on where you stop and start chapters?

Has there ever been a more selfish, self centered bitch in the world, ever? Gosh, poor Gary. All his wife is thinking about is her 6 month gang bang with three Russian Studs. With no way to stop it. Her only concern is to NOT get pregnant. Gary hated this option, cuz the sex from his wife was cut off. But on the other hand, this birth control was the best option to help prevent his wife from fucking around or even enjoying it when she does. Myself, I would have opted for this Birth Control, so what if we don't have sex for a year. At least the wife won't be looking forward to a 6 month gang bang. Tho she may have it whether she wants it or not. Poor Gary, his wife has betrayed him in every way possible except for actually taking a razor to his manhood. but she has actually done that emotionally. 5 stars to writer, for Great writing, Great Story, and Great effort. I just hope we have a happy ending, tho it doesn't look possible at this time. thks, Buster2U

Way too wordy and repetitious. We don't need stuff repeated over and over.

So it’s still a ‘will she won’t she’ story but it’s just about reached the stage where I really don’t give a monkeys. These are supposedly very intelligent people and if that’s the case I’m pretty glad I’m as dumb as a stump.

He said in part two that he would accept her infidelity painful though it might be, here he’s outright giving her permission, practically begging her to do it.

And there’s still another eight chapters of this…stuff. Yippee.

i wish i wasnt invested in this already, as i would prefer to not waste my time on this never ending drama. get on with it chopped!

So next chapter is the folks in space getting to know each other and build the sexual tension. Then chapter six is the space gang-bang recorded by the Russians the put out on the internet, right??? 7 should be the fallout while in space, then 8-9 the horror back on earth …. Finally 10 they start to talk and 11 they re-unite…

I gave this story the benefit of the doubt and continued reading this chapter. Beyond sorry that I did. What exactly did these 4 pages add to the story?? Absolutely nothing!!! I won't be fooled again. I tend to go by the old saying "Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me".

So…she made his m feel like chopped liver.

My God, she is wishy-washy...how long will she coyly agonize when it's clear she's reflexively putting herself first. My own marriage is one of numb loyalty...a sense of nostalgia is truly all that keeps us together, but if my wife had treated me THIS disdainfully, I'd have walked, and I'm far too much of a weakling to do that unless savagely and serially provoked.

A lot of interesting overthinking here but the constant flip flopping between her libido is completely gone to, she is so sexual that she is bound to screw the Russians, was hard to follow. Nice portrayal of the difference between having sex with a dead fish versus a highly responsive woman, but there are millions of women who lay there and think of England and just as many men who couldn't care less. It was good to read descriptive portrayal of passionate sex.

You have an interesting premise here, but man does this ever read like a dissertation. You say there’s a lot more parts, so here’s hoping you can pause a bit and maybe cut the fluff and replace it with some life.

She is the true definition of a narcissist. I know this isn’t a BTB story, but a little rocket crash would suffice……

Gary really can stop being a martyr now. She's gone, he can stop being a strong supporting player for her now. He needs to use his analytical skills to detach himself from her emotionally in order to save himself. This man will not take it well being publicly humiliated and to be a laughing stock in his field when she begins her trysts with the cosmonauts. So jettison her now, to save himself. Support her as a friend, Mercy kill the love she mortally wounded months ago as an act of preservation. If he is the outstanding and good man everyone espouses he is, then let him be saved from what will be the straw that will change that forever.

Author, it’s really ok to have an unwritten thought. In fact it’s often preferred. Too bad you don’t understand that. In my opinion this would’ve been so much better had it been 50% less on the verbosity meter, and even then a good but not great story. I’m done.

enough with the "psycobable" already.....get on with the story.

A story, which, in itself, is good enough to keep me reading further episodes......but

please get rid of the verbal fog that defeats the whole purpose of your writing

........CAPTURING YOUR READERS ATTENTION

The Crucifixion Syndrome Is Strong In This One

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Oh, the Suffering, the Sacrifice, the Self Immolation! Its a family affair: "And another child grows up to be Somebody you'd just love to burn." At this point I don't think the MC is suffering near enough. Maybe Peggy will come back pregnant in a Polyamory relationship with all the Russian studs. And maybe she won't come back on an American shuttle, but a Russian one, so she can just stay in her new homeland with her child and husbands. I won't be happy till I see this cuck faggot weeping blood. Just maybe then he'll shut the fuck up. God what a moron.

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I'm not even curious about the pity sex he's going to get from Kathy. In fact this story was over about the same time the marriage was. All that's left is the cleanup and disposal. And that's supposed to take 8! more chapters? What a waste of electrons. I hope you're running on solar energy. But, no. Nothing about this story is that bright.

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Better than Sominex. Thanks for the effort.

Horrible story line, poorly written. It's sad when you can skim pretty much the whole story and not miss anything other than boredom from the excessive repetition.

At first I enjoyed the in depth dialogue but it has become monotonous and it is ruining the pace of the story as it rolls out. Gary is turning out to be a cuckold, her a whore in space and I don't know what else. Some real resolution is needed to keep this going.

Ever hear of the morning after pill? The whole pre-flight pregnancy thing is kinda outdated.

@ChoppedLiver

Look up words you do not use very often, but sound impressive. Like ‘bilious’ and ‘furloughed’ and ‘embarrassment’ (just stretched too far) and ‘pie-eyed’ (hyphen needed, and poorly used as a ‘drunk’ sub)

A major international intrigue was foreshadowed by Hubby’s disrespect for ‘suits’ without credentials or passion for NASA and its missions. Hubby pointed out that the crew selection stank like a skunk, dead from salmonella last week. Part3 spans about 4 months. Either this was a deliberate distraction or there will be a flashback of Hubby doing what he does best … fixing important things as efficaciously and quietly as possible. But he would have to have been working on that before Sweetie left.

Still way too much repetition … as soliloquies (no lack of dialogue from this author.

3*. but gonna skim through subsequent parts.

Another waste of an hour of my life. Total crap.

Too much redundancy. Often you repeat the same idea using different words. Often it seems like you have a point to make and you drafted 50 ways to express it, but you cannot choose one so you use all of them. It is almost as if different expressions one theme seem equally valid and you hesitate to identify one as suitable for your purpose.

..... Get the idea?

Way too wordy...

This just keeps getting worse as you paint Gary weaker and weaker with each chapter. He has no pride or dignity. He is pathetic and a loser. No man with any backbone stays with this completely self-absorbed narcissistic bitch, much less offers to die for her so she can go on. Please just have her put a bullet in his head and be done with it, or allow him to become a real man and dump her utterly selfish ass. This is beyond awful. Would give it a minus rating if possible, but one is as low as feedback is allowed to go.

And the trend continues. More and more of these type of writers are making husbands weak and pathetic. Their ‘love’ for the wife is the only thing that matters even if it destroys them and/or the marriage. You have them so emasculated and pathetic they are sickening. You allow the wife to be selfish and a slut with hubby going along with it. Seems to be the goal of the story to have wife be a space slut and hubby her earthbound foolish cuck. Nonsense

Yes the plot line is slow developing. However once I had been hooked into knowing what the author would unfold moving forward, I wanted to continue following the story line. Good writing and very much out of the norm from most stories published here.

Well written but this is a rather wordy relation of a couple speculating things to death, exacerbated by a shrink. Why would she be excited by Russians? Not exactly the country of romance, is it?

It would be a great story if you shortened it by half.

Repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat. Please think about it.

I like the comparison between the different ways they think of Russia. I was a paratrooper in the army during the cold war. The Soviets or Russians will always be the enemy to me. I never thought of them as new friends. There are a ton of Russians here I live now and I don't like any of them

I am rarely happy to see an author's ratings take a nose dive as hard as yours are the more chapters you put out; but in this case, I'm not mad about it.

I'm hoping you'll take the advice and criticism given to you in almost every comment that I've seen on the first three chapters and retool the remaining.

Ultimately it's your story to tell, and if you are happy with it, I guess that's that. But you're tanking your credibility as an author who is capable of crafting amazing stories the longer you don't take the feedback that literally EVERYONE is giving you and maybe edit the remaining chapters with some of the advice that's being given.

I am rarely happy to see an author's ratings take a nose dive as hard as yours are the more chapters you put out; but in this case, I'm not mad about it.

I'm hoping you'll take the advice and criticism given to you in almost every comment that I've seen on the first three chapters and retool the remaining.

Ultimately it's your story to tell, and if you are happy with it, I guess that's that. But you're tanking your credibility as an author who is capable of crafting amazing stories the longer you don't take the feedback that literally EVERYONE is giving you and maybe edit the remaining chapters with some of the advice that's being given.

Struggling to decide whether to stay with this potentially excellent, but s l o w and repetitive sage just to finally get to what can not rationally have a "happy" ending! At THIS point, it's barely a 2!

Perhaps the readers could start some sort of "dead pool" sort of thing. We seem to have time to do it. We can guess dates and outcomes. Will she yield to horny commies and if so, in what chapter? Will she get pregnant and in what chapter? Will her husband blow up the spacecraft and if so, in what chapter? Will cosmic rays have an effect, and in what chapter? Will she bring forth a super species and if so, in what chapter and who will be the father? Will she pleasure all three Russians and if so, by what chapter? Will weightless sex be all it would seem to those of us on earth? Will she blasted across the room when her mate shoots his load, or will the Russian be hurled backwards, possibly smashing his ass into the station's controls, and if so, in what chapter? How long will cream pies float around the capsule and in what chapter will the first pie appear? How many cream pies (floaters) will there be by the time the capsule splashes down? Will it sink, will the parachutes fail, will Gary simply masturbate for a year and what will they name the kid? So many questions. A pool to wager on these issues and many others may be in order.

"He was willing to make huge concessions, maybe even forgiveness of an accidental affair"

??? Accidental ??? 1 cute female vs 3 grown males alone in a little room for 6 months ... accidental ???

So, how much more humiliation the "problem-solving expert planner" childish idiot husband is going to get from the dissociative-minded space b1tch ?

Repetitive, from chapter to chapter, and within each chapter. Hopefully chapter 4 actually starts to tell a story, else this spaceflight is DOA…

Worth the effort to read and reread bits where needed. Fully intrigued to see how this plays out.

I can't believe there are 11 chapters of this? There's like 10 pages of nothing happening. Lots and lots of dialogue, very little action.

Still too wordy and a bit overly dramatic. The administration would not put up with nonsense especially the debauchery being hinted at.

I'll finish though.

11 chapters of psycho-blabbering just to mask a simple sluttish cheating far-from-home story as an adventure space story ? Let's hope not.

Way to much navel gazing and Gary isn’t some sort of super agent he’s a whiny little kid.p who needs to grow a pair.

I can understand your going over the same plot points several times, it is evident that many of the readers on here, have poor comprehension with their comments and the stupid points they make. You've got my attention. Obviously with so many chapters to go something is going to happen in space. I would suspect Peg is repeatedly raped for a 6-month long gang bang. Obviously, Peg isn't concerned, all she wants is to continue her mission. She doesn't give a crap about her poor hubby. Prob won't care if she is gang-banged either, as long as it is in space and Hubby can't stop it. When a selfish, self-centered woman is highly sexed there is no limit to how many cocks she will take. Hubby's only chance to keep his marriage is to take out all three Russians ahead of time. Hubby's thought that there are no "coincidences" will obviously ring true once the three Russians start raping Peggie's ass. When no one can do anything to stop it. Everyone will know on the ground, Peggie will be very traumatized. Hubby will be fucked over by the heartless wife once again because she will be so ashamed. Hopefully, he will be able to find them in Russia, and take them all out! Poor hubby, in love with a selfish heartless cheating wife. Still 5 stars

I hopefully get what you're trying to build here....but really, verbose doesn't even come close. It would have been a good story but your desire to see as many words published as possible has ruined it. I give up and think most other readers will too.

Way too much internal dialogue. I think each character said the same thing 3 or 4 times. Hope part 4 is better

Good chapter!

4

Choppedliver, I am enjoying your story. As others have said it's a bit repetitive but still good. My only fear is that it's an 11 chapter cuck story. Keep the chapters coming.

A few other commenters have called this out, but there is a major plot inconsistency. If the injections turn Peggy into an emotionless shell with no sex drive, why is Gary worried that she will be crawling the walls after a few more months of no sex? She's been a dead fish for the last four months. Under the same conditions what ignites her during the next six. There was a vague mention earlier that her shots might be altered, but other than that one mention, there's been nothing to indicate that is the major concern of Gary. If that is the real underlying reason for his concern it's certainly not been presented well.

Having said all that, other than being too wordy I've generally enjoyed the story and build-up.

I am really enjoying this tale - please go ahead and post the rest.

I am a little disappointed with this chapter. Let me start by saying that I think you have an interesting story going here, but this chapter didn't deem to jibe with the first two segments.

Disappointment is rooted in missed expectations, of course, and Gary doesn't seem to be the same character here. All of a sudden, he has become passive. From the beginning, you led us to believe that he would be kicking some NASA and bureaucrat butt. Now he has apparently abandoned that intention. Only you know where the story is going, but in Chapter 01 Gary indicated that he would be investigating those who recommended the course that Peggy took. I suppose one could argue that after Peggy took the shots that it was a fait accompli, but that seems to be even more reason to dig in. There is no sign that he has made any research as to whether the treatment can be reversed or modified.

In this chapter, it is stated that Gary has been mothballed, implying that he is basically impotent. In the prior material, Gary states that he is working a desk job in an analyst position and has the power to do basically whatever he wants. He is not showing any of that here.

This is the first chapter that spends any real time with Peggy's thoughts and I found her less believable. I had no problem accepting her as a job-obsessed scientist, but unless there is evidence of Ausperger's/autism, I find it unacceptable that she can be that clueless about her partner's sentiments. Actually, autism would probably disqualify her from spending six months on the ISS.

This is nitpicking. I am very much looking forward to the next installment and I will hope that my concerns will be alleviated as the story progresses.

Well written story

I hate that a man that plans and even goes on high stake covert operations is such an insecure basket case when it comes to his personal life. Yes spouses should do everything reasonable to support each other but Gary's life is completely trashed at this point and there is no way to get back what it was before Peggy was chosen for a mission into space. I hope Gary divorces Peggy after she returns from space. As long and drawn out as this is and we are only on chapter 3 of 11, it should have gone in the novel category.