by erotica4theshyexhibitionist
Someone should do this app for real. But I have a question, are DarkPassenger or SubtleG someone from Alex's life? Just need a yes or no answer, I'm too curious to wait for an answer!
I like very much this new version. I don't know exactly what has changed but the story is more understandable then last time. I can follow better the development of the dares now. And it's exciting...
You might want to correct this line "Some of it was surely reverential: to some degree it was the same sense of discomfort she had felt once she learned Susie was Professor Grant's nephew." Nephew not Niece? Unless Susie is Transgender and the first I caught it.
They’ve all been good but I’ve liked this one especially.
@jofeyes, that’s mostly what is different. The way the app talks to Alex and explains the situation is more fleshed out. And for punishments, she gets to choose between 2 rather than be given one (so far she’s always picked the one that was given to her in the previous version). As far as I can tell, nothing else is really different.
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That little clarity does help a ton tho. I love this story, but I was making little notes last time so I could keep track of where things were and even what day it was. That’s not really all that necessary anymore. The author updates on the status of the app and what day it is more, now, I think.
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Almost nothing else is changed tho. And I like that. I didn’t really want anything changed from the old story (with one small exception to add more detail to the story involving a dare that’s coming later). I just want to see it continued. It’s one of my fav stories on the site.
Thanks a lot Anon, no matter how many times you re-read and review a story, you always miss something, and that "nephew" slipped pass me every single time. Not sure how it could end up there in the first place: Susie is surely a female character, always imagined her like that. Edited version of this chapter should be up soon enough.
@Steve jo and the others: yes I'm glad you noticed, most of the changes I've done were meant to guide the reader through Turnons features and throughout each day. Proper new content is coming up in the next few chapters and for the dare you mentioned, I think
Me thinks Susi is DarkPassenger or at the very least a users on Alex's turnons freindlist. It would explaind how DarkPassenger would know things about Alex's activity off of Turnons.
Chapter 13 should come up any day now. And on chapter 14 I'll add a recap of the characters to keep track of them as the story goes on
This is easily one of the best written, best devised, hottest stories I've ever read. You have put together an amazing idea with believable characters-- that's what's so amazing, how believeable it all it. I don't really care about a story being "realistic", but you've absolutely cornered how dare-givers on an app like this would talk, the day-to-day tone of academia, and most critically: how awfully friendly and dry these apps and social media terms are when they use their terms, conditions, and ubiquity to shuttle us wherever they want us. As opposed to data collection for third party sales numbers/lifestyle clues this one is dealing in exhibitionism, voyeurism, a kind of lusty voluntary blackmail. It's amazing! I'm sorry to ramble on about it, but if you've ever gotten hate or complaints for this story (or some hardline demand that you shift gears), I say to hell with them!!!
Anyway, sorry to go on and on. I really hope you're enjoying writing, and that you keep doing it! Can't give you enough in the way of congratulations, laurels, roses, lol, anything at all
After reading the next chapter, I must say this one is the hottest ever. Nobody in the real world could write something like this unless she is the real Alex, the fight between fear and the urge to reveal more of her beautiful body has kept my blood pumping.
All I wonder is what the writer would have been feeling while writing it, some part of me believes that you must be as wet as Alex is in the story throughout. This thought makes me seduce even further. But it could be just a fantasy, perhaps.
Anyways, I love it. Please keep on writing like this. Love you..