All Comments on 'Valiant Valkyrie in the Zoo Ch. 08'

Already read this story on Central, but with diff heroines. Mediocre.

So even if Groxx's spawn and the other creature's offspring turn on them because they love the women that raise them more, Groxx will still see this as a victory even if it ends with the offspring killing him?

Though with how the civilians of beach port are treating their heroines, maybe the mother's to be might not mind their progeny taking over the city. They might even encourage it.

By the way, i'm surprised Groxx didn't betray Lady Lana. I was expecting him to turn on her and leave in the same state as the heroines.

@Anon1: Yep, this is based on one I put up on Central not quite a decade ago at this point. I wanted to move it over here as well; but that required some changes based on relative site policies. Lit does not permit NC material using copyright characters, which the original was, so all the heroines had to change. That goes for pretty much all my stories over there, so this is part of a larger project to convert them over to a new ‘universe’ where I have complete control over them. Lit also does not permit depictions of sex with normal animals, which the original 1000% was, so that had to change as well. The overall result is much longer than the original version: the old version of Zoo is about 15,000 words, this one is a little over 45,000 so it roughly tripled in length; this mostly came from significantly extending pretty much all of the sex scenes as well as adding some entirely new ones. That said, the bones of the story are unchanged, that is absolutely true. Apologies you weren’t a fan; I have entirely new material coming shortly so hopefully that will be more to your liking.

@Anon2: Would Groxx see it as a victory if his own creatures turn on him but replace humanity anyways? Yes, partially - it's not the one he would prefer but it would still be a kind of posthumous victory. You can see this as him achieving tactical and strategic objectives at the same time in a way; tactically he gets a bunch more minions while incapacitating his enemies; in the longer term he has planted seeds that point towards his ultimate objective (and which will also pull resources away from those same enemies). On your second point - yeah, it's going to be something of a running theme that the citizens of Beachport are by and large terrible people. On Betraying Lady Luna: this is absolutely a temporary alliance, that pretty much dissolves at the end of this story. That said actually turning on her immediately would be contrary to his aims; he's got enough on his plate 'dealing with' all the heroines and then escaping the authorities afterwards IMO. A showdown between them might come later, though I have no immediate plans on writing one.

I can see the citizens of Beachport being the cause of some of these heroines becoming villains themselves.

"Lit also does not permit depictions of sex with normal animals..." Yeah, for reason. Thats f...g disgusting!

@Anon3: “they’ll become villainesses at this rate” - this is actually an idea on my ‘slush pile’ list - albeit since it’s only at the idea stage if we do see it it won’t be for a while. My process typically involves jumping between several different things at once and letting things lay fallow a while, so any one individual work doesn’t tend to go from idea to final very quickly at all. Rare exceptions, but very rare.

@Anon4: “that’s disgusting!” - yeah I won’t argue too much on that one. As mentioned, the original was something I wrote almost a decade ago and is certainly one of the most edge-lordy things I’ve ever produced. I don’t plan on making anything like it ever again. I will have more nonhuman material at some point, but it’ll be more like aliens or something that came out of a supervillain’s test tube.

Stop War! Stop Putin!

"I don’t plan on making anything like it ever again." Good for you, by the way, you have a lot of unanswered comments under your other stories, check them out.

Great ending, really enjoy the expansions. I've been trying to think of why this story stands out so much amongst your oeuvre, and I think (other than the obvious angle pointed out by so many commenters below), it's that it's simultaneously as total a defeat as you can imagine without being an ultimate defeat. The heroines lost in as utter and complete a manner as one could imagine, but they're still theoretically capable of recovering in the future. It has an almost Saturday morning cartoon quality, insofar as they're utterly humiliated, but you know they'll be back next week.

I actually think my favorite setup here is the kissing booth, which I think is a new one for this revision.

Oh! Another thing.

I meant to say earlier how much I liked Wilderlass's leopard-print civilian panties, both because they're cute and on-theme, and also because she evidently winds up displaying them frequently enough for VV to be aware she customarily wears them under her khaki shorts.

Oh! Two other things!

From Part 1: "One screen showed what was happening to the actual Zoo Director. This was perhaps the least pretty of all, but fortunately, it was the furthest from Vestal's line of sight."

I thought maybe the story would circle back to this by the end... But it didn't! I'm curious because I could see the caged animals having a particular vendetta against their chief captor, and I could see Groxx being extra contemptuous of a human demeaning animals by holding them in captivity while not possessing any notable powers themselves.

@: last Anon. Re: unanswered comments. I'm aware. Apologies for unexpected hiatus, got knocked on my ass a bit, more details in my profile. Regardless, should end shortly, new storyline starts dropping 3/20. I've tried to go back and answer any comments I missed, if you notice any i still haven't addressed with the next few days please let me know.

@ NoComeupance: thanks for the copious feedback! I'm going to go back and start replying to them in order shortly, should get back to this one in due course.

Correction: unfortunately, the 3/20 release date mentioned above is no longer valid. I had to make some edits and that chapter got pulled back to pending. I will update with a new release date once it is available.

Schedule update: got pushed back one day; edited version has been accepted and should now release on 3/21. Many thanks to Lit’s staff for turning the edit around quickly, and helping to cover for my mistakes!

@NoComeupance: yes, speaking personally, this ending has always been one of my favorites. It’s the entire reason the story exists, really; it’s been a very long time since I wrote the original but I’m pretty sure the starting ‘idea’ for the story was this bit with the heroines all in cages; and then the rest of the story basically emerged as the path to get here. ...well, actually, I tell a lie - having jogged my memory, the bit that in this version appears as Sun Idol getting done by the Suaropod was the actual spark, for reasons that don't bearing getting into, but I think the ending came right after that.

Re: the kissing booth; yeah the entire petting zoo sequence is new, as are the ‘hamster wheel’ and the webbed-up ladies giving birth. The ‘original’ only really has the bits that appear here as Hexetress and Black Cicada, plus a few very incidental descriptions of some others.

One thing I am kind of regretful of is that I didn’t do more ‘signs’ for the new exhibits; like the one Valkyrie reads off of at the end for herself. But at the end of the day I couldn’t come up with that many ways to rephrase ‘gigantic slut’ in fake not-latin without it getting repetitive, and the insulting scientific name was kind of a core part of that, so I basically just stuck with only having a couple of those.

Re: the Zoo Director - to be honest I didn’t even think of that. It was originally just kind of a throwaway line to answer the question of ‘what happened to the ‘real’ Director - oh something very unpleasant is happening to them but don’t worry about it back to the smut’. You are right, Groxx would probably have a very low opinion of them. But on the other hand I’m not sure if I could have added them back in in any way that wouldn’t act as a distraction from the heroines - who are ultimately the main point of this whole affair. I mean, they’re a non-character, we don’t even know what they look like. So… yeah; I can see in retrospect how I set up the expectation, but ultimately I don’t think it was worth following through.

What's this central you and some other posters have mentioned?

It's another website I've previously published stories on. I'm not sure exactly where the line is on specifying other sites; I'm pretty sure just giving the URL is not permitted on the grounds that it would basically be advertising. So I'll try to direct you to it in a separate comment right after this one. If you don't see a second comment that means it got moderated and you're probably on your own.

If you click the Website on my profile, it will take you to my author page there. The full name is Danger Babe Central, hence 'central' or 'DBC' for short. Searching for that should also get you there, eventually.