Miscellaneous Limericks

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Channelling my inner Edward Lear
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This series of Limericks first appeared on a thread in the Authors’ Hangout forum.

The first ten poems each reduce one of my stories to this familiar format. Links are provided to the source material.

1. Wanted to be Wanted

Young Emily wanted to play
But found that her crush was quite gay
She cried on the shoulder
Of a guy who was older
And found he’s a pretty good lay

2. Because I Deserve It

Our Em gets her first taste of bondage
As she’d pushed a fake cock up his passage
She was spanked til was raw
And then tied to a door
Then fucked in her ass deep and savage

3. Fishing Trip

After Amy and I finished class
The strangest thing happened to pass
She met me at a bar
Drove me home in her car
Then shoved her arm way up my ass

I of course recognize that this will rhyme or not according not only to the reader’s country, bu what part of that country they are from. Apologies that I couldn’t do better with this one.

4. Club Emily

A predicament for this little miss
She‘s tied-up and whipped with a hiss
She’s stuck on a pole
And the overall goal
Is to then make her drink her own piss

5. You Spin Me Round

Our heroine’s restrained and ready
And spun round while holding her teddy
She takes lots of cum
In her mouth and her bum
Which made her legs feel quite unsteady

6. Strapped-down & Strap-on

A BDSM session with Amy
Her crops and her whips meant to pain me
She straps on a cock
That’s hard as a rock
And pounds my tight ass just to train me

7. Something Has Come Up

To wake up one day with a cock
For Emily was quite a shock
But she ended up chillin’
With Jana and Dylan
Then fucked, fucked, fucked, fucked round the clock

8. The Pornstar Experience

His dream was to meet her for real
Skin on skin what he wanted to feel
But his cock wasn’t rising
Which was so surprising
Until kissing her turned it to steel

9. On My Knees

It’s Emily here on my knees
You know I am looking to tease
Change my look change my pose
Let me strip from my clothes
Put your cock in my mouth, pretty please!

10. Just Do As I Say

My boyfriend is up in the sky
To Europe on business he’ll fly
And I haven’t been good
In the way that I should
I’m sorry, have this JOI

11. Waking Up

This girl really should still be sleeping
But my stupid phone started bleeping
I’m not smart enough
To turn the thing off
I’m blonde so a “d’oh!” is in keeping

I’m awake now, what rotten luck
And my mind wanders to having a fuck
Should I wake him as well?
Did he not hear my bell?
Perhaps I’ll just give him a suck

The following two Limericks are about Coleoidphilia, but its genesis, rather than the story itself.

There once was a maid all forlorn
As she had to write tentacle porn
When she’d asked them to choose
Which subject to use
They voted her clothes should be torn

There once was a maid all forlorn
As she had to write tentacle porn
But then in the end
She’d an octopus friend
Who filled up her tummy with spawn

The final two are just random, the last is my personal favorite.

There was a young lady called Miller
Who invited a guy once to drill her
Holding open her butt
She was such a slut
And pleaded the guy just to to fill her

There once was a girl who said quick
I must write a good Limerick
But she found it quite tough
Wasn’t quite good enough
To think up a last line that rhymed 😬

THE END

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18 Comments
EmilyMillerEmilyMiller20 days agoAuthor

@roverone - thank you 😊 Emily

roveroneroverone20 days ago

all quite smart

EmilyMillerEmilyMiller3 months agoAuthor

@Tail_Gunner - I have to get round to compiling volume two from TP’s thread 😊 Em

Tail_GunnerTail_Gunner3 months ago

Those are fun! ... I'm not generally a poetry guy; but these brought a smile.

.... One writer, one runner to another

Tail_Gunner AKA Levi Coldwater

EmilyMillerEmilyMiller4 months agoAuthor

@ctarrantella - thank you 🙏. I have a bunch of other ones, so maybe a sequel. Em

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