Clara

"We can go there, but... I need to make a stop first. Fix something that... I broke."

Theo seemed upset when I had the carriage pull into the DuPont estate, but she stayed quiet. I glanced at her. "It's only for a moment, I need to speak to someone, then we can go. Alright?"

She gave me a nod, understanding.

I knocked on the door and a servant answered, looking at me curiously. I didn't recognize him, he was new.

"I wish to speak to Henry DuPont, please."

"Come in, please. Your name?"

"No, I don't want to come in," I told him quickly. "Just... he will wish to see me. Please hurry."

"As you wish," the man nodded, then stepped back and closed the door.

I waited nervously, trying to go over what to say again.

When Henry opened the door, his look disgusted, all thoughts fled.

His look turned to confused shock, then he stepped out and reached towards me before hesitating.

"Clara? Clara... is that really you?" he breathed, looking at me in stunned disbelief. His hand touched my face, fluttering around it as he shook. He slammed into me with a hug, lifting me off the ground. "You're alive! You're alive, Clara! I don't understand?!?" he cried, letting me down and holding me out to look at me.

I shrugged away from his hands and stepped back, looking down in humiliation. "I... faked it. To get away from you."

His hands jerked back as he stood up, looking hurt.

"Thad helped me. We... pretended to be married and lived way down in Manitou... He was killed last month and..."

"And now you come crawling back," he hissed. "Wanting me to take you back! What makes you think I would want you after you did such a thing?!? I ached for you, Clara! I was despondent for over a year! I wanted to end myself! What makes you think I can just forgive that and take you back? Take care of you as if you didn't almost kill me?!?" he cried in anguish.

I shook my head quickly, stepping back further. "I didn't come for that! We are on our way up to Jenova, Theo and I. I just... wanted to stop and ease your mind. Make sure you weren't still mourning me. I hope you've moved on and you're happy, Henry, and I'm sorry I hurt you. You don't have to be sad anymore, you can just be angry and hate me, that's better than thinking I'm dead," I whispered, then turned to get back in the carriage quickly, before he could see me crying.

"No! NO, you are NOT leaving, Clara!" he snarled, yanking me back to him and turning me to face him. "You aren't leaving! Not again! You will NEVER leave again, do you understand? You are still my wife! You didn't die, that means the vows stand! You are my wife and you'll be a wife to me! Do you understand?"

"I understand?" I whispered, confused. "Henry... you can't still want me? Not after what I did?"

"I do want you, Clara. I want to punish you! Make you hurt as much as you hurt me! Get that woman, get her out of the carriage and bring her inside!" Henry yelled, turning to pull me inside.

I shook my head, terrified as he dragged me through the halls, people stepping out of rooms and staring. I heard my name in shocked whispers as Henry pulled me all the way to his bedroom, then threw me in.

I landed on the floor, then stayed there, looking down at it. I deserved to be punished, to be made to hurt the way I hurt him. I would leave after.

He pulled me up and turned me, tears rolling down his angry face as he looked at me.

"I loved you, Clara! I adored you and treated you so well! I took care of you and gave you everything! Why? Why would you do this?"

I shook my head, unable to stop my own tears. "You stole me from him, Henry! That's all I could see, all I could think of! I thought... I thought I loved him! I did love him, in a way, but it was so stuck in my head that I should have been with him and you stole me! I shouldn't have left that way, I shouldn't have broken your heart... but you shouldn't have taken me either! Taken away my choice! Made me feel like something better was stolen from me! I built him up in my head, imagining how much better he was, how much more he was. He saved me and he was so sweet and gentle! I put him up on this huge pedestal!"

"And he didn't live up to it," Henry sneered.

"I don't mean it that way," I said quickly, ashamed that I had even intimated such a thing. Even if it was true. "He was a good and kind man!"

"But you didn't love him. He wasn't all you were hoping for, all you had imagined in your head. That's why you felt so guilty about what you did to me. You missed me and you wished for me."

I looked away. "If you are going to beat me, get to it. The trip to Jenova is a long one."

"I told you, you are MY wife and you aren't going anywhere! And I'm not going to beat you, Clara, I'm going to fuck you. I'm going to fuck you and keep you in that bed for a god damn month! And you won't even try to resist me, or I will beat you! Now take your god damn clothes off!" he yelled, yanking his own shirt off.

I stared up at him, my mouth open.

"NOW Clara!"

I swallowed hard and turned away, reaching back to undo my buttons. I didn't get two undone before his hands were on me and he jerked the dress open, making the buttons fly off in every direction. As rough as he was, he was careful not to actually hurt me as he tossed me on the bed, then climbed on me, holding me down to kiss me.

I didn't fight him, not at all. I was thrilled, my entire body reacting to his hands and his needs. My hands gripped him and explored him as I kissed him back as enthusiastically as he was kissing me.

He pulled back, his eyes hooded as he sneered at me.

"How long since you've come, Clara?" he asked derisively.

I looked up at him in confusion, then shook my head. "Alone or with a partner?"

"With a partner."

"The last time you and I were together."

He smirked, his eyes shining as he reached down and slid his fingers between my legs. "I should get you close and stop. Hold you down so you can't get there. Tell me the truth, Clara, how often did you make yourself come?"

"I... almost daily. Sometimes more than once a day."

He chuckled. "And who did you think about, Clara? Not the old man, was it?"

"No Henry," I whispered, my breath catching as he rolled his fingertips over my clit.

"Tell me," he rumbled, then gently bit my jaw.

"I thought of you," I told him with a groan as my back arched. "I thought of you and all the things we used to do! Of this! Your mouth, your lips, your hands!"

"And what else, Clara?" he rumbled, his mouth on my neck.

"Your cock, Henry! The way you made me feel! Like you wanted me! Like you couldn't get enough of me! Like I was all there was for you and we were each other's worlds!"

Saying it out loud made me realize it was true. I had been Henry's world and I had loved it. I had loved him being my world, too. I was never Thad's world, I was just a very small part of it. He always belonged to everyone, not to me. It was one of the things I adored about him, but I didn't even realize how much I missed being so incredibly close to Henry all the time. Being with him all the time and never getting tired of it.

I tried to recall back to a time when I hated him and realized that I hadn't. Not since the night we were married. Not since I stopped being afraid of him.

Even now I wasn't afraid of him, I knew he wasn't going to actually hurt me. He might threaten and be angry... but he wouldn't hurt me. Even as I looked up at him, behind his hurt look there was adoration and love. He was happy to have me here, back in his life, back in his arms, back in his bed.

I closed my eyes blissfully as I pulled him into another kiss. I was happy to be in his bed. "Please Henry," I whispered, tears falling freely now. "Make love to me?"

"I don't want to be gentle!" he growled, taking hold of my face and looking me over. His look softened slightly as his lips parted. He was still so beautiful with his full lips and smiling eyes, even if they did look lost now. "I've missed you so much, Clara!" he whispered. "I've needed you so badly! Promise me you'll never leave me again! I can be different! I can be someone you can love!"

"No! No, please Henry, don't change! You were perfect how you were, truly... I did love you, I just didn't realize it. I do love you, Henry. I don't deserve the way you feel about me, not at all after what I did... but I will try to make it up to you. Try to be a good wife to you this time and not resent you and pine after another. You were always worth loving Henry, even if what you did before was juvenile and wrongheaded. Please... let me make it up to you? Let me make you my world like you made me yours? I want to Henry!"

"Because you have nothing else? Nowhere else?" he asked, looking hurt again.

"No, Henry... I have plenty. More than enough to buy a house in Jenova and live out my days in comfort... It's because I want you. Just you, Henry. You... can come with if you want. We could live out there in a little country house. You can help me garden and can vegetables and fruit from the orchard. Have some chickens. Theo would live next door, but it would just be us. No one else at all, just me and you till the end of our days."

His mouth twitched to a smile. "You'd want that? Just me and you and no one else? No servants or lot's of dresses or people always around?"

"I'd prefer it!"

"So let's do it," he grinned. "My folks have pretty much threatened to disown me if I don't remarry and give them grandchildren. That's never going to happen. Grandchildren I mean and I am fine with that! As long as I have you, I am fine with anything, Clara. It even sounds kind of fun, just us in a little house, taking care of each other." There was pure joy in his eyes and I smiled up at him.

"Then let's go! Say your goodbyes... or don't! Pack a few clothes and let's go! Right now! Well... after you make love to me, but right away!"

He laughed and kissed me again, then made love to me. He was gentle but passionate and he made me scream for him and come for him for hours.

I was exhausted by the time he finally got up and stumbled to the door to flag down a servant for refreshments. As soon as he fell back into bed, this door opened and his parents came in.

They looked confused and upset as I jerked the blankets up. "Henry? What is this?" his father demanded.

"You found a girl who looked like her?" his mother asked, still confused.

"It was all a misunderstanding," Henry answered, sitting up. "She never died, she left. The old man staged it and helped her."

"And our grandbaby?" his mother asked hopefully.

I sat up sadly. "No, the baby didn't make it. I can't have children, my body wasn't made for it. I left for personal reasons that Henry knows about but I promised him I wouldn't speak of."

"We deserve an explanation!" his father snarled.

"Remember I told you she wouldn't say yes unless we allowed her family to stay here too?" Henry asked with a gallic shrug. "It was a lie. I picked on her a bit, flirting with her, but she wasn't interested. I tried to bring her around, even made her kiss me once, hoping to sway her. When she still said no, I went to James and tried to buy her, but she had run away. The old man, Thaddeus, he had helped her get away from James and Kristina after James had tried to rape her. She was staying with them and when I came to claim her after offering James a dowry, they lied and said Clara was already engaged to the old man. I knew it wasn't true, she was just rejecting me still... so I took her. I took her and brought her here and told her if she didn't marry me I would do something awful to her friends and her pet. I only wanted to get her here and married so she was forced to give me a chance to show her we could be happy... but she never forgave me and she left. She came back after discovering she missed me and she did love me after all."

They were looking at him like they didn't know him, then his father bulled up. "You mean she's tired of not living here with servants and..."

"Actually, she's asked me to run away with her. To a little house in the country with no servants. She wants to raise chickens," Henry grinned, learning back on his hands.

"You aren't going to do that!" his mother cried, terrified. "Please say you aren't running away and living like a vagabond! You have to stay, Henry, please! Both of you! Please stay!"

I eased up as Henry put an arm around me and kissed my head. "It's all her choice," he shrugged. "If she wants to stay, we'll stay, but if she wants to go, we're going. But if she does stay, her friend is staying too. What was her name, my love? Thespia?"

"Theodora. Theo," I told him quickly. "Thad's sister."

"That would be lovely, I'll have a room made up for her!" his mother smiled brightly, giving me a pleading, hopeful look.

Henry turned and grinned at me, looking my face over. "There's going to be a lot of explaining and questions, but I'm willing to own up to everything I did. Let them all know why you felt you had to get away. I'm just lucky you came back," he sighed, then pressed his head to mine. "But if you really want to go live in the country with chickens, then I'll learn how to garden!"

I giggled and pressed my face to his arm. "If... we stayed, could I have a garden?"

"And chickens," he shrugged. "And your orchard."

"We have a lot of space, just back behind the estate!" his mother said quickly. "It would be perfect for an orchard! And there is plenty of space for a garden as well!"

Henry looked back down at me, his eyes sparkling. "Need a week or two to think on it?" he asked softly.

"Can we think right here in bed?" I asked in a whisper.

He laughed and pulled me into a kiss, then turned to his parents. "We won't be down to dinner tonight, but we'll come to lunch tomorrow. Could you ask Manda to bring Dodger in? I think he's going to be very happy to see Clara. Maybe even as happy as I am."