All Comments on 'Yvonne'

He needs to fill her cunt with hus cum and start a very torrid affair.

Extraordinarily fortunate is the young man who encounters such a woman. Equally fortunate is his eventual life partner. I’m eager to see where this story goes.

Good premise.

But sex happens much too abruptly. And it proceeds much too fast.

Needed a lot more in the way of foreplay/preliminaries. She should have given him directions/instructions about how she wanted him to touch her. And how to touch her. And where to kiss her. And how to kiss her.

She should have carried on a conversation about how he liked what she was doing to him. With details.

Three stars.

Good start !

awesome, keep going

Good beginning, keep it up!

Very nice beginning!

I agree with others, nice start - but why are you giving us tidbits with a half page? Write the story and give us something to sink our teeth into. Much too short in my opinion, just when it's beginning to get into something interesting you cut it short - like a weekly half hour television show.