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A 5, But...

Tad to fast.
by this I mean that your springing to muscle points of plot to quickly and not enough detail is going into the skin itself.
think abou thte underlying plot as the bones, then you fill that in with filler points, like a sex scene or a fight, that would be the muscle. that's the part everyone really enjoys and its what makes a good story line into a good story. what makes it great is changing the details of the skin. more details on that, moving between fight to sex to history. bring in the scenery, bring in the smell of the air the humidity in the air. stuff like that.
if you need an editor then i'd be happy to consult

im kind of hoping anna is on planet instead of connected through the astral/dream state only.

So ready...

Looking forward to next chapter about Michael. Angelis is really evolving and enjoy the reading about it. He has some interesting ladies in his life so hope to hear more about the assassin lady....:)

Chapter 59 has been submitted

I've finished chapter 59, and have submitted it to Literotica. With the delay for moderation over the weekend, you will probably see it up on the site by about Tuesday next week.

It's 13 pages long, so quite a long one. I hope you enjoy it!


so far ive gotten the same responses in feedback for these 2 titles

Path Of Magic
Guided by Destiny

so how about we combine the 2 as a fifth title choice

Path Of Destiny


This just keeps getting better and better as the chapters flow from your fingertips!! I can't wait till the next chapter arrives!

Even better

It does make more sense. Falling through chaos, that only one would land on the planet.

Thank you onand. For the story and the consideration on posting, but believe me. This is a story worth waiting for (when you've run out of prefab).


Also it is following the classical path of 'harem collecting'
it's storyline is compelling enough to make up for the worn-out 'classical' path of things.
So keep it up, so far I enjoyed it greatly!

Regarding your follow-up title:
"Path of Magic" sounds best to me,
however, continue writing, and once you read a certain point,
look back and decide based on your gut-feeling.

Love it!!

I love these characters!! The Imp is great and their innocent exploration of all things sexual is great! Keep writing!!

Just reached the first page

and I had to say this to you
This story is fucking awesome. its so cool, never mind well written and thought out!

American Dream and continuing this story

So, first some bad news: do to personal reasons I don't want to go into I stopped feeling comfortable writing this character. For now his use and this series is indefinitely on hold, although I might come back to him and it at one point.

Now the good news: I always intended on doing a bunch of stories set in The Academy and eventually having American Dream go off and start a super team after graduating. I recently started a serial I've been trying to add to every week (The Rise of Dr. Akitomi) that at first had a few flash backs featuring American Dream. As the story has moved on she's become a more prominent character in the story and in fact it looks like that series will end up becoming an origin story for a super team lead by her, so you should go check that series out!

Anonymous is on the right track but you will know more as the next title progresses Drevan.

Just to let you all know you can still post comments on the story here the leave feedback is only for voting on the title of the new series.

Enjoying the story, keep up the good work.

Scott's destiny is cloudy to Kadur because the Maker has allowed Scott free will in his decisions, so his destiny is not written in stone yet. The Maker is hoping that his new Champion will make the right choices in the future.

¤Hiding in Port

Nanite loaded railgun rounds.

Terrifying and efficient.

Don't destroy what you can capture.

You also prevent killing opponents.

Capture and facing your crimes is worse than death.

I like you! Stick around and bring more info from those ideas.

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