NonHuman Comments

Load newRequesting new commentsRequesting new commentsNo new comments, try later

Latest 15 Reader Comments

Very enjoyable for a first time story

I'll admit, I thought the "nonhuman" was a vampire so I was surprised when it turned out to be a werewolf (don't know why vampire came to mind). I did enjoy how you eased into the story by having Emma get drunk, slipping on the ice, then getting rescued by her mate. I also liked how you told us about Emma's personality (too stubborn and drunk to realize she was drunk). I enjoyed how you used the smell of spices to define Jordan and Emma. I grinned at Emma's assumption that Jordan came into the bar with his girlfriend, rather than his sister (So true - most women would reach the same conclusion.)
That being said, I do have a few suggestions - none so major they detracted from my enjoyment of the story, but some things that are easy to fix (having an editor would help as well).
1) Paige stood in the door frame behind him, but at a look from Jordan, pulled the door closed and left.
"Jordan." The doctor said, extending his hand towards the man. I realized I'd yet to know his name.
--> Was confusing to read the name Jordan before we found out who he was.
2) ... my mom used to make this beautiful smelling concoction on the first of December. She would pop in the oven and the whole house would lift with the smell of Cinnamon.
--> missing a noun after "pop". Reads as though Mom "popped" into the oven herself..
3) Ending seemed a little rushed. From the entrance of James, the explanation of werewolves, to mating, moved rapidly. I was surprised how quickly Emma said "yes" to mating, without really think through it all - I would have thought Emma would ask to think about it overnight before answering the question. (Yet her landlord knew Emma doesn't make rash decisions - but decides to become a werewolf in a few minutes?)

BTW, you can also write a Chapter 2 - by reading the comments, I think others would appreciate it too. The additional chapters won't be part of the contest, but 'tis OK.
luv2read2
PS. Glad you decided to write this story! Yeah, I know my comment is way long :-), but want to help so I can read add'l stories from you.

Too short!

I live your stories! It’s like anime, once it gets good it ends and I have to wait for the next episode! Please keep writing! I can’t wait to see the wedding or see which girl gets pregnant first!

Glad you are back

Love the story and so sorry for your loss. You are a great writer and I have read everything you have written. Please do not give up, I am sure you have a lot of fans out there that love your stories as much as I do.

Disappointed

I don't know I wasn't really satisfied that she married darian I kinda wished she just sent him home from the beginning to say he just bit her, no he freaking sexually assaulted her on their first night. In my opinion Ladrian was perfect for her. Lucifer I don't know I wasn't feeling him this whole story because of how weak he is. Like he really needs a 18 year old girl to save him. Pathetic. And just letting her push him around like that he's no alpha male at all.

Thank you....

Thanks for writing more. Story keeps getting bigger, more loose ends. Be careful where your going..

Thanks again
Keith

sigh

never mind. you concluded their issue in 1 sentence and I missed it the first time.

Sweet Sexy Story

I liked this. I enjoyed both characters. Lilith was a little too inscrutable and didn't seem to be vulnerable enough. That said, I enjoyed the dialog, the banter. And the sex was hot, including the magic monster cock. I think the pregnancy angle was novel. 5🌟

First time comment

I finally made an account and this is my first comment. I love your writing and this series. There are a few writers that I look forward too and u are one of them. I love the originality and easy flow of this story and can't wait for the next chapters...

Best wishes!!!

Cynergy

confused

so no ending for nancy and shay?

Ugh Tentacle Porn..

And I was starting to love this. HP Lovecraft meets HR Giger to do Eclipse Phase. This was going so well until the tentacles. Is this site anime central now?

Reveal the monster! Do it bit by bit. Do it slowly, sneakily but don't hide it behind the vagueness of a bunch of tentacles.

It had so much promise.

Some other praise

Very good story Annabelle! The many mysteries and hotties are calling, seducing me to be explored. I do hope that Jenny can be redeemed/helped, so she can find happiness instead of being in an everlasting situation of rage and sadness.

I am so hooked...addicted...enthalled!

Can't wait to read more and see all the ways this entertains! Thank you!!!

Good Girl

Great story telling. Love the little sulfur cliffhanger. I enjoy how you bring each character to life.It almost feels like they could be real.

Very nice

Very nice chapter. I hope we haven't heard the last of Jenny. She kind of got a raw deal. Love the series and variety in the creatures.

Forgot your password?

Please wait

Change picture

Your current user avatar, all sizes:

Default size User Picture  Medium size User Picture  Small size User Picture  Tiny size User Picture

You have a new user avatar waiting for moderation.

Select new user avatar:

   Cancel